Friday, June 20, 2008

No More Free Food For Paula


In case you were wondering why Paula Abdul was looking much more thin lately it is because the restaurant dude who was living with her moved out. I don't know what possessed him to move in with her to begin with unless he had just been kicked out of his parent's place and needed somewhere else to stay for free for awhile.

I mean she was probably so blitzed half the time he could have been living there with six other people and convinced Paula that it was just a rehearsal for Idol. She would have mumbled, slipped on her dog and just fallen back to sleep right where she fell.

Paula is of course now, ahem 46, and still wants to have a few children. I know, I know, and I'm not a biology expert, but I'm guessing she would have to adopt and hopefully there aren't any countries that are stupid enough to give her a kid. Just give her a doll that makes noises and she probably won't notice the difference.

She can bring it to Idol with her and prop it up on the judges table. Every year or so just switch it out with a new doll and she won't ever know. Lets face it. The woman doesn't need a kid. There really is not enough money in the health care system to ever fully treat someone for the trauma they would face as the child of Paula Abdul.

11 comments:

fiveleavesleft said...

Restaurateur? I thought Prescription Drug Rep would've been more her speed. Or downer. Or muscle relaxer.

fiveleavesleft said...

Opps, forgot liquor distributor.

jax said...

they both look f*cked out of their skulls.

he has molester eyes. ew.

captivagrl said...

i hope the idea of being a mommy just floats out of her head.

what is eight past six? said...

Paula has always wanted kids. It's the (supposed) reason she and Emilio got a divorce, if I recall correctly; she wanted kids, he didn't. I used to wonder often if she ever regretted that divorce, after going through another one and after all this time having no kids to show for it. Not saying either of them should regret the divorce; but I just ponder how she feels about it.

I also wondered why she didn't consider adoption, particularly after her second divorce. I realize I am taking a liberty here by assuming that she had a sober period in her life (she looked like she was sober on the first two seasons of AI).

But now...I agree with Ent that she shouldn't have kids, but at the same time I don't think she would be the WORST mother in the world. I think she would be more on the neglectful side due to the alcohol or drugs or whatever her particular poison is, which just means her kid(s) would be like 90% of the other celeb kids raised in Hollywood. But not verbally or physically abusive.

RagDoll said...

I think she should be allowed to adopt Barron Hilton. I know, he's already 18 and all, but still....I think they could make it work.

lutefisk said...

Maybe she can adopt Ben Affleck--he doesn't seem to need a lot of care.

boobsu said...

Anyone see her reality show? I can't believe they actually aired that and that people sit by each day watching her behave in that manner. She was seriously fucked up! She went to clap and practically missed her other hand!!

Ayesha said...

I agree with gayla. I think she would love her kid, but I don't think she is capable of the amount of WORK that goes into keeping a child alive.

Honestly, I don't understand the women who want children but wait until their late 30s to really get serious about it. It's like me deciding I want to be a doctor at age 37. Technically it's not too late, but it wouldn't be a good idea, either.

RagDoll said...

adrian--

but he's got SO much more body mass than little Baron...I don't know if Ben could keep the peace with Mommy were he doing her whole stash of, uh...everything... Baron could just sip, like a hummingbird...

lutefisk said...

ragdoll--maybe we can keep Barron for the gay blinds, & Ben for everything else?
Hopefully Paula & her saggy boobs won't insist either of them have to breastfeed.
I am still trying to figure out how to work Ben, Jennifer Garner, & Clooney into the Blind item. If I ad Scott Foley....hmmm??

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