Wednesday, January 04, 2012

Paris Hilton Makes Up Nights With Prince Harry & William


For some reason FHM decided to put Paris Hilton in their magazine. I have no idea why. She does not sell magazines and no guys I know think she is even mildly attractive. Any portion of the brain that may have thought she was attractive has been overwhelmed by everything that has come out of her mouth and the fact that well, she is Paris Hilton and has been with what seems literally everyone and by everyone I mean people you would want to disinfect before coming near, let alone having sex with. I literally just got shudders.


Anyway, as part of the torture FHM is inflicting they also interviewed Paris who blathered on about her business empire and how she has had over a billion dollars in sales in the past 6 years. Uh huh. In the interview she talks about how she was filming a reality show in the UK and went out a few times with Prince Harry and William a few times and that they were really nice.

She makes it sound like they agreed to meet up and go out or they picked her up or she dropped by their place. None of that is true. She ended up being at the same club as them once, I think, and maybe just maybe it was twice. They ignored her every second despite her trying her very hardest to make them notice her. Do you honestly think that if they had actually hung out with her that she would have failed to talk about it incessantly and posted photos to Twitter every five seconds. In her mind she went out with them. You know what? In my mind I had sex with Angelina Jolie the other day with Eva Mendes on the sidelines cheering me on. Does not make it actually true.

30 comments:

Rita said...

Even Royalty visit whorehouses.

figgy said...

Yay! Paris has finally descended to the nadir of utter patheticness!

Can Kim Kardashian be far behind? I think not.

EmEyeKay said...

@Rita, oh SNAP!

Off topic, that's got to be the worst magazine cover design I've ever seen. That's bad.

Patty said...

She obviously provided favors to the editor. Why else would she be on the cover?

Cheryl said...

If I recall correctly, Paris just happened to be at the same club as the princes and she stopped and said hello.

parissucksliterally said...

she is so fucking pathetic...hahahaha

she looks like shit in that picture. Time has not been kind to this woman.....ugliness working it's way out.

FrenchGirl said...

Harry can like her (he likes blond easy party girls and he's known as big players)

Texshan said...

That's not hot.

RocketQueen said...

FHM must be really hard up for content. And by content, I mean women who can shove entire cigarette packs full of cocaine up their hoo-has during flights.

timebob said...

I think Paris knows she is at 14:59 on the fame clock.

There is nothing she won't do or say at this point to get some press.

Cheryl said...

Lol RQ. Hoo-ha has always been my term of choice.

Now! said...

Wonder if the cover star they'd planned fell through for some reason, and they knew Paris would be available on very short notice.

Sylvia said...

Parasite is so pathetic. Hopefully 2012 will be the end of her LOLOL.

Sherry said...

Hoo Ha is also my favored term along with LaLa. But that is one crapy design and nope Paris..You're not aging well dahling.

BigMama said...

First let me just say that the cover is horrible. I mean, seriously, her legs look like lumber with stockings


Second - Enty, I love you but the mental image you just put in my head it going to stay with me a long time, longer than a 6 pack at least.

Shay said...

Why is she popping back up? I thought she had finally disappeared for good.

Mango said...

LOL @ lumber with stockings!

She reeks of desperation. Next stop, Kardashian Junction, please!

mikey said...

I'll accept Hoo Ha, but Doo Da is my preferred term.

Del Riser said...

This is not a good photo, she does have fairly nice legs. I believe we are seeing her in the US again because she has fulfilled all her requirements after her bust in Las Vegas.
You do not piss off Steve Wynn, her then boyfriend Cy Waits lost his very lucrative job with Wynn, and Paris was banned from all his properties. The judge told Paris if he heard of one whiff of trouble from her he would throw her ass in jail for the full year.
And, our jails have room.

ForSure said...

For all her money, why do pictures of her always scream FAKE HAIR FAKE HAIR louder than a fighter jet landing on an aircraft carrier.

Cousin Eddy said...

Paris Hilton is a pay-for-play high dollar prostitute. Her specialty is kinky fetishes and she's been spending a lot of time in the Middle East lately.

Rita said...

@EmEyeKay, Lol! Boys will be boys, even royalty has to learn the hard way how to differ good from bad stock;)

Bleu said...

Oh man I got bored reading about her before it even got to the William and Harry part.

The Black Cat said...

It looks like someone photoshopped her head onto someone elses body there, no neck?

The Flower Girl said...

loves her!

mooshki said...

Del Riser, for some reason Wynn forgave her, and she was back partying at his club this New Year's. Wait, why the fuck do I know that? I've gotta spend less time on the internets...

Sis Cesspool said...

What the fuck is going on? I thought you had a moratorium on mentioning that scab? Pay much?

El Roy 13 said...

Sure...and Kate Middleton raids my closet and I'm married to John Frusciante (and he Worships me). Puh-leeaze

Del Riser said...

Well Wynn just recently got married so maybe he was feeling gracious. The court considers all her requirements met here. She has been in Vegas but not at Wynn or Encore, until New Year's Eve.

lutefisk said...

South Park nailed her correctly---Stupid Spoiled Whore.

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