Friday, January 12, 2007

Four For Friday

This actor has always been known for his HUGE ego. Well now it turns out he has something down below that is just as huge. Talked about in London, but really was just talk, even a legend. It was all supposition really, until he was filming his latest movie. Thinking our star was out and about, an assistant walked into the actor’s trailer without knocking and saw our actor changing clothes and what he saw has been repeated over and over and would put even Mr. Diggler to shame.

Lots of actors make the leap from daytime soaps to primetime television or the movies. This young actor made that jump and more. Coming out of nowhere he made it to the top. However, he might be headed right back to the bottom. Since his big role, our actor has got an enormous head and as a result has a list of demands a mile long for any future employer. Most execs did not think he was that great to begin with and have a grudge against the soon to be in-laws. The demands are just a way of saying no. Despite no new roles, the demands have yet to go and so our actor has yet to go back to any kind of work.

Hit television shows and hit movies, a new dream husband. This B list actress thought she had it all. She thought she knew the guy she was marrying, but it turns out he kept something very secret from her and might as well have been a stranger. When they were dating she always thought it was cute that he wanted to wait until marriage before living together. The reason he did not want to though was his drug problem. Going home everyday allowed to him to medicate until they got married. When they got married he would wait until she left for work, and then get his fix. One day she came home early and his secret was out. She made him go to rehab and he readily agreed. When he came out, everything was fine for a few months but he relapsed. Not wanting to give up and believing that marriage is for life, she made him go to rehab again. Since his release in the last year, she has taken him everywhere including work. Instead of take your daughter to work day, she has made it take your husband everywhere you go. People not close to her assume it is because they are in love. The reality is she does not trust him or want him out of her sight. So far so good, but how long can she be a babysitter to her husband instead of a wife?

This actress was always the goody goody. She has worked hard to change that image by doing less family friendly films and making sure to wear enough see through dresses on the red carpet. She wanted to lose the squeaky clean image to get better roles, but also to sell the idea that she was sexy and desirable to men. She has no desire for men, just wants the world to perceive her as a sex symbol. Everything was going according to plan until her last movie for which there were raves. There she met another actress and love was in the air. They were inseparable for the entire shoot and even got an apartment to share. Once filming ended, our actress decided to end the relationship for fear it would damage her career. The new lover who has been quietly out for sometime and is quite the scene stealer thinks our actress should get smart and stop pretending and start living.


Yesterday's blind item. You should read it as 1,2,3,4,5.

The adjectives - some of you were on the right track -- you are just thinking way to much

GG date - the chocolate that was guessed is correct

The Kate Bosworth article gives a HUGE hint to one of the People's Choice blinds.

Friday means Four For Friday so it will be coming up later today. I thought you would all find the hints to be more helpful, but in some cases I guess that did not occur. Perhaps I will steer you in a more understandable direction later for the ones you still are having trouble deciphering.

Since I have no prohibition on Nicky Hilton let me tell you that she is going to be at the Golden Globes on Monday night. I cannot wait to talk about her and she who must not be named on Tuesday's blog. I do not know if I want them close to me or the other side of the room. It is kind of like an accident. Should I look? Should I just pretend to not care?

Posh Spice in Playboy? Yesterday, Hugh Hefner made a very public offer to Posh to take part in her very own Playboy pictorial. In addition, the two believable girlfriends of Mr. Hefner also stated they wanted to do a pictorial with Posh and they have big plans for her and her alien body. I think she will pass on the opportunity to become a third, but think she will actually do the solo pictorial. On the link is a video from Hef making the offer.

"Hi, I am Siena Miller and for the past six months you may have noticed I talk about sex a lot. I talk about how it is now with my alleged boyfriend and how it was with all my ex-boyfriends. But, really what I am most proud of is my extremely realistic sex scene in my upcoming movie. Now, I understand no one really wants to see the movie. They just want to see the sex scene. So, to save you the time and trouble of actually going to the movie theatre, I am just going to let you see my sex scene. And for those of you at work, it is not safe. Remember it is realistic." (EL's note - you may have to click on the screen to get it started)

Pam Anderson thinks Sacha Baron Cohen should get a Golden Globe for Borat. I agree, so the world must be about to end. Pamela wants to also get involved in more issues worldwide. This is new LA codespeak for I am going to adopt a few babies also so watch out.

That guy from the "cat" blind item is allegedly getting married this weekend. Two pieces of advice for Ms. Moss. If you are arguing over who the best man is going to be, this is probably not going to work out. If you are always doing things at your house or your vacation home because he spent all his money on drugs this is another sign that things might not work out. Now, I could be wrong. I am sure there are a long line of drug fueled, money hungry marriages that have lasted a lifetime.

K-Fed is not getting $50 million or anything even close despite what all the "insiders" say.

Take one guy from four different boy bands and put them together. What do you get? A reality show that actually looks interesting.

Ummm, Courteney Cox says there will never be a Friends reunion show. I say she is wrong and that there will be one within the next two years. You say, EL, she would know. And I say, yes she would and she is not going to say anything to distract people from her new show Dirt. The reunion show will happen.

Last, but certainly not least are some congrats to Spicy over at celebritysmack who is having her very first radio interview over the weekend. She is a great person and manages to juggle even more than me to make her blog work. Spicy does not want you to confuse her with Posh Spice or the pictorial with the Girls Next Door and does not want to be any closer than necessary to the alien.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

I know I do not usually do links in the afternoon, but this one was too good to pass up. Ask Men magazine is reporting today that Nick Lachey is not getting married anytime soon. This was the first blog to tell you that and we told you on December 18th. I guess their source is not as good as mine. Either that or they just used my information and waited awhile so they would not get caught. That is the second time in a week this blog has been waiting for all the rest to catch up.

Now, with that being said, lets all get to what you really want to see.

If you are involved romantically with an actor or actress, you really should think 2,3,4, or even five times before letting them run off to some international movie set leaving you home alone. (I know what you are thinking/too easy) Well this actress has taken a shine to her new castmate. From the time filming started recently, they could not get enough of each other. She has been dating the same guy for awhile and this break from the mundane is exactly what she needed. At first she was going to treat it just as a fling. Not usually a tabloid victim means she can do what she wants and who she wants without much trouble. The problem is she has started to fall for her co-star and is maybe even PG(not like the movie). Her current boyfriend meanwhile is just waiting for his girlfriend to come home.

Hints are what you want so hints you will get. This is where we will start.

Adjectives will give you the advantage in these. Two you can see and one you cannot. If you call the event by two names rather than one, you will soon be having all the fun. To have more fun just rhyme the second name to find the missing adjective which will solve the Jackass part of the game.

Let us continue here.

These were supposed to be easy, but somehow you have gone astray. My latest Golden Globe date has a special chocolate relationship which should help put at least one in place. Sometimes a cat is a kitten, but they can still tear apart things if you let them.

Britney Update and so much more. I think for this afternoon's post I will just post one or two blind items because some hints are needed. So you can definitely look forward to that in a little bit.

So, I finally got a phone call returned from my "friend" and I asked the questions you wanted. I did not always get the answers, but I got the general idea. The guy she was with this past weekend is nothing serious. She does not want anything serious. She just wants to date and have fun, but not be as wild. She really felt like she missed out for two years solid of her life by having back to back babies. She does not understand why she cannot date people with no hidden meanings or thinking they are going to be with her forever. She went from one serious relationship to another and had children and feels the only thing odd is that each and every step she takes is photographed. There is nothing sordid going on in allowing Kevin to have some time with his kids and have joint custody. His parenting skills have never been seriously questioned. There were not many specifics about the children offered which I can understand. NYE was a combination of too much going on, too many people to entertain, too little sleep, a long night, and the stress of the previous month. It was just too much all at once. She is excited about her new CD (had to get the plug in) and is always working on it even when not in the studio. I could tell this is something she is really proud of. Oh, and as a final note, she does not think she is the worst dressed person in the world, but is never going to be the best and does not really care.

So, you go into a restaurant you have never been to before and ask for some recommendations. A wonderful idea and often the waiter's will be happy to help. You take the waiter's recommendations and when the food is delivered, eat one bit of soup and let the rest just sit there. If you weren't going to eat the food Kate Bosworth and were not going to take it home, then why the big production? Not a lot to say in this comment, but the article has a hint so I could not let it slide.

David Arquette speaks out about Jennifer Aniston. First I am shocked Courtney let him go on Howard Stern. Well actually I am surprised she let him speak. But, he did good and actually revealed more in a few minutes with Howard then any magazine or gossip blog managed to get in a year.

You know the world is ending when David Gest lands his own television show. At least we will get to meet his housemaid Vaginica. (yes, really her name)

So when you are the Extreme Makeover doctor, you basically just move from one Playboy model to the next. I am actually a little worried about the future of Dr. Makeover because of who Ms. Canseco was previously married to, and the tell-all book she wrote about that marriage. Doc, you might want to think that one over again.

In order to try and get some type of publicity, the Kim Kardashian alleged sex tape rears its ugly head again. Why is it back? Because someone made up some new stuff about it including the fact Kim and Ray-J are trying to sell it for a million bucks. (Not going to happen), Oh, and that there is a golden shower at the end. Who does it to whom is unknown. (Lovely). I also love how Nick Lachey is considered her ex. I guess the one time they went out to dinner was enough to make him an ex.

In order to keep my promise to Lindsay Lohan and find some good news to report, I went to her official website. Not some website maintained by 18 year old wanna be stalkers. One would think that any publicist worth a nickel would make sure the website was updated at least weekly if not more often. They should be scouring the earth looking for any paragraph that praises Ms. Lohan. Alas, the thing has not been updated since November 2005. I guess this is why they have not got back to me about my offer to make this a love fest week for Lindsay. Seriously, I am too lazy to check and see who her publicist is, but they should be fired. So, I say to myself, Lindsay is a big writer. We all know she loves to take pen to paper or stylus to Blackberry and just wax poetic. So, I clicked on her journal and it was last updated in 2003. Well, I moved on over to the charity link. Surely, ms. Lohan has been involved in charitable good works. Something that a KINDNESS item could be written about. Well it seems that yes she has been involved in charitable functions. The most recent took place in January 2002. What was she then? 12?

Being the cynical guy I am, I figured that if I click on the store link, it will be updated and ready to go. Everyone wants money and that is a good way. Well everything is older than ________ (fill in your own joke) But then I realized that it was not a publicist who was at fault, but perhaps Ms. Lohan herself. The reason? In the very first item for sale, the word separate is spelled seperate. I just do not think that is adiquite. Check out the site and the store for yourself. Photos are from her website so hopefully they will not sue.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

People’s Choice Awards Special

I have been waiting for this day so I could have a theme of sorts. All of the people involved either were nominated themselves or are/were involved with a show that is nominated. That was the standard I was going to stick to. BUT then something happened at lunch yesterday and I said to myself, I can expand this to things that happen on the day of or even the night of the People’s Choice Awards. Had to expand because this item was one of the funniest things I have seen in a long time.

Going back to the earlier post today. I used the Burbank Holiday Inn as a link for a risque photo of she who must not be named. Imagine a couple in Toledo getting tickets to Jay Leno and looking for hotels close by. They love those Holiday Inns and so they Google Holiday Inn Burbank and see a link for something entitled the nether regions of said hotel. Click on it and at least one of them will make a remark about how LA hotels really are different.

Anyway, so at lunch yesterday. Popular place, but nothing outrageous or pretentious about it. A few celebrities were there and this particular B actor(movie and television) was in a corner being friendly with his date. VERY friendly. The kind of friendly where you know that this is date 1 or 2. The kind of friendly where she did not bother to wear much on top or bottom. The kind of friendly where this was just the start of something that was going to continue long into the afternoon. They were definitely getting their groove on. I had no reason to suspect what was going to happen next because I did not know he was married. I just thought he was enjoying being someone. A waiter interrupted their groping/petting at one point to whisper something into the actor’s ear which was unintelligible. However, he stood up quickly and said "My wife?" He grabbed the girl, pulled her up from her chair and dragged her out the back door of the place in about 15 seconds. I really did not think someone could move that fast. At about the time the laughter died around us, a woman I did not recognize, but presumably is his wife came through the front door with two of her friends, and the entire place, en masse kind of shifted to look, looked, and then went back to what they were doing. Only in LA.

This B list actor is starting to ride high. He has been in the business since he was a toddler but has just started to change everyone’s perceptions about him. He is loving life right now and in his mind things could not get any better. In addition to acting, he owns his own company with two of his friends. Moving from one project to the next and his rise up the ladder caught the eye of a still teenage C list actress on the way up. She has always moved from one guest spot to the next and always finds someone to sleep with at each of these stops. Whatever she is doing is working. Instead of one off guest spots, she is starting to get some multi-episode jobs from her grateful previous co-stars. She used our actor to gain a couple of film roles and now wants to move on. She is tired of sleeping over at his place, pretending to still like him and making small talk like she still cares. She has larger fish now to find in the film world. He is crazy about her, knows nothing of her past, and would be crushed to learn that she is using him and his name and is counting down the days until production starts on her new film next month. Thanks to his help, it is her biggest role yet and should vault her to the B list. But for him there will not be that fairy tale ending.

This actress has had her ups and downs and been big and small in her television and film career. On her current hit show, all of the cast and crew have tried to play cupid, but to no avail. Although she was recognized in the past, nothing prepared her for what she is going through now. Previously, even when on a popular show she was able to be with her female lovers in public, but that is no longer possible. Instead she goes on a blind date with a guy and finds something wrong. She then delays as long as possible before being set up again. She longs for her old life where she did not have to hide. She used to have a long distance beard but that ended when her relationship with her ex girlfriend ended. She wants to come out but is afraid despite the fact that real life and fiction are not always so different.

You know I am just grateful to be able to talk about something other than she who must not be named and her extended minions. I think London Sheraton is really feeling the lack of attention since she did an on purpose boob slip last night. No links to it because frankly, everyone has seen at least one if not both of them being photographed, filmed and groped and there is no need for more. (Besides there is a ban on her until the 15th)

Marilyn Manson who has been diverting attention from Barstow Marriott is not usually a target of the pap, but in this case is too good to ignore. First there were the late night calls from Lindsay Lohan which will always get you in the tabloids. But now, there is more. Seems our gothic one has a thing for 19 year olds that look nothing like his wife. Evan Rachel Wood is the lucky girl. Now, I am not one to jump to conclusions, but the list of activities the couple has shared seems to be lengthy and I wonder if any of them happened before Ms. Wood became 18?!? Of course now that she is 19 and he is 34, that is much more respectable. Of course it could be that Marilyn (woman's name) likes dating Evan (man's name) for other reasons.

In today's episode of the Lindsay Lohan love fest, I want to take you back to October of last year to the 10th Annual Hollywood Film Festival Awards where Lindsay was given the Breakthrough Acting Award for her acting in Bobby. We are all so proud of you Lindsay. Even Emilio Estevez says you are the best and that is saying a lot from the guy who is Stakeout and Men At Work. Not to mention that he had to sleep with Paula Abdul or at least pretend to.

If that thing with Kate Hudson and I does not work out, then at least I have a back up plan. Drew Barrymore can be my date to the Golden Globes. Yes, she is all over with Fab. Actually, as much as Drew would like to go to the Globes with me, I actually think this relationship was good for her. Whenever I saw them together they always looked happy and nothing was forced for the cameras. For the record, NEVER say how much you love someone and love being with them in a monthly magazine interview because inevitably you break up with that loved someone by the time they ever get the issue to the newsstands.

Kelly Osbourne. Playboy. Fully nude. What can I really add to that?

It has been awhile since we got to trash Heather Mills, and I miss it. I really do. So, this article talks about how she went skiing in Slovenia and stayed at a place that only costs about $50 a night and is two hours from the closest skiing. The article accuses her of being cheap by staying there. Honestly, I don't really care that much except to say that it appears she was staying with at least 4 other people in the room. That is the story. That, and in the box on the right with related stories is the headline Mucca hit me with false leg. See, that is class baby. That is money.
Baby Spice needs money. There really is no other reason for wanting to reunite the Spice Girls. She is kind of like the other Jacksons who all need Michael to say yes to a reunion so they can make some money. Otherwise they end up on UK Celebrity Big Brother.

See, when you make a deal with Melanie Griffith for an autobiography. You have to remember a couple of things. It probably is going to only cover the last few years because it is going to be hard to remember anything past that. The other thing is, she was supposed to do it when she turns 50. My guess is she does not want to admit she is even close to 50. She probably thinks she is still married to Don Johnson or doing it with Ryan O' Neal while Tatum was allegedly watching. I do know that if she really did tell ALL, it would be incredible and as much as I am not a fan of hers, I would be at the front of the line to buy the book.

"Hi, My name is Sienna Miller and it has been two days since I had an article written about me so I need to talk about myself again. I have the best publicist in the entire world. I love talking about the sex scene I did in my latest movie. We made it as real as possible. To make it seem like I care about anything other than myself or Jude Law, I am pretending to date this guy who used to work at the hotel we are staying at. We are reenacting our sex scene everyday so that way we can keep talking about it forever."

"Hi, My name is Mariah Carey and it is the media's fault for portraying me as sexy. It was not my decision to wear next to nothing as often as possible. I just do what everyone else does and everyone wears nothing."

For sticking around this long, here is the link to the nether regions of the Burbank Holiday Inn

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Some easy ones today just in case you are not interested in the Jay-Z and Beyonce story

This very smart actress finally got her big break and then the show was no more. Hopefully her new movie will be a hit. She recently made sure her boyfriend never would forget his birthday. Besides the bars and the food, she arranged for a private show in their hotel suite featuring two lovely women. What was supposed to be just watching by the celebrity couple, turned into so much more. Our actress decided to take a turn and participate as well. After enjoying the talented women, she wanted her man to join in the fun. The foursome proceeded to make it a night and made some birthday wishes come true. What will he do for her birthday?

In order to support his drug habit, this cat like rock star used to be a gay prostitute. Wonder if he thinks his current girlfriend is as pretty as the boys he used to love.

Are Beyonce and Jay Z already married?

Yes, we have heard the rumors before, but this is the first time that an actual location is being offered as the place the wedding occurred. In addition, for the first time a source has identified photos which were taken immediately after the ceremony took place and are at the end of this post.

It is generally acknowledged that Jay and Beyonce began dating in August 2002 in St. Tropez. They had previously worked together while recording "03 Bonnie & Clyde," but this was the first time they had been seen in public as a couple. Throughout that fall and winter there were rampant rumors about their engagement which they always denied. In fact, they even denied they were a couple for most of that initial period.

In spring 2003, Jay-Z confirmed they were a couple in a backhanded way. He told the New York Daily News on March 12, 2003 that he and Beyonce were a thing of the past. When Jay-Z was asked about Beyonce not being in his new video, Jay-Z replied, "My point exactly."

During that time frame, the April 2003 issue of Playboy was released and Jay-Z stated in that issue, "I used to see her all the time. We are not engaged, by the way. We’re just cool. We’re just friends." In order to drive the knife as deep as possible, Jay went on to say, "We don’t really, ah, know each other like that. Me and Memphis Bleek, we’re tighter. He’s been with me since 1994. Between Beyonce and him? Beyonce’s got to go."

Showing that forgiveness is a part of love, Jay-Z and Beyonce were seen together two weeks later having lunch together in NYC.

We have now confirmed they are a couple. Now, let’s get them engaged.

On January 28, 2004 Jay-Z attended a party for his great friend Lyor Cohen. At that party, Jay-Z made a speech where he stated, "You’ve (Cohen) been one of the best friends I could have had...Apart from this woman (Beyonce) beside me, who I love and will marry soon." After the announcement the crowd at the party went crazy. No official announcement of this engagement was ever made, but none was needed because Jay-Z told the world himself.

Shortly after Jay-Z’s engagement announcement, Beyonce stated that she had no immediate plans to marry. During that summer of 2004 when the two could have got married, Jay was in the middle of rehearsing for the now infamous Best of Both Worlds Tour with R. Kelly while Beyonce was finishing a tour with Destiny’s Child and started filming The Pink Panther. In May of 2004 at a press conference announcing the beginning of production on the film, Beyonce was directly asked whether she was married and she answered, "I’m married?, No, I am not married. She was not evasive and answered the question.

We have them engaged. Now, let’s get them married.

In the summer of 2005 Jay-Z and Beyonce returned to the Mediterranean which was the sight of their first time together as a couple. It was late June 2005 and the weather was great. They were having the time of their life and now was the time to get married. On June 15, 2005 just before dawn they were married in Italy. The pictures below were taken almost immediately after the ceremony.

Shortly after the ceremony, Beyonce was interviewed by Vanity Fair magazine for their November 2005 issue. Again she is asked if she is married. Unlike at the press conference the year before this time she answers, that they are not even engaged. (That was not the question. Any couple who marries is no longer engaged.) She then goes on to say "how can someone be engaged and married at the same time?" She then changed the subject and it never came up again.

In December 2006 when there were reports that Beyonce and Jay-Z were going to marry, a representative of Beyonce stated the couple was not going to get married that weekend. The rep continued by stating that Beyonce had no plans that weekend or any time in the near future. ( No need to, because they are already married.)

If you are looking for hints and clues for yesterday then you will have to wait until Friday when some will be revealed. This afternoon I will post a couple of blind items and possibly a story that I am still trying to check out. It involves Beyonce and Jay-Z and is HUGE. It could explain so many things about their relationship.

See, everyone is tired of the Rosie and Donald story and everything that goes with it. I am just leaving all of it to the great people over at Page Six and their New York brethren. On this site we dig for dirt that examines the underbelly of the gossip world including 25 year old allegations concerning William Shatner trying to kiss a woman. I think sexual harassment is abhorrent, but what is the point in waiting 25 years to say that William Shatner tried to kiss you?

Do you think the reason Kylie Minogue won best dressed female this year is because she wore clothes, while Kate Moss has a tendency not to?(NSFW) I agree Kylie is an incredible dresser, and deserves it. You have to realize that many of these best dressed and sexiest men alive, etc. are all compiled by which publicist can kiss the most ass of the various editors involved. The top of the lists can be held sacrosanct, but the rest is in return for interviews or exclusive invitations to events and premieres. It is all just a game. That being said, I am thrilled for anything positive that happens to Kylie.

I would have never guessed that male porn stars took Viagra. Jenna Jameson is just glad she got out of the porn industry before it got too out of hand. I guess she is okay with everything else that goes on. She must think that Viagra cheapens the experience or makes porn seem less realistic. Well I for one have always thought it was all real so am glad she told me that some people are faking it.

Well I for one never thought I would be giving Lindsay Lohan a standing ovation. First there was her miracle cure from appendicitis, and now she has thwarted Marilyn Manson's attempt to procreate. Lindsay along with many others called up Manson each night wanting to come over and party. Manson who is alleged to have a drug problem was very happy to oblige. Thus, Dita von Teese who wants to have a baby was never able to get Marilyn alone. Therefore no spawn as of yet. Thank you Lindsay Lohan. For that you get a free pass for a week There will be no links to you alleging drug or alcohol use. No use of the word firecrotch or Blohan. We will not reprint allegations of promiscuity whether it be with a man or woman. There will be no stories about your ex boyfriends. No snide comments about Wilmer and your mom. No photos will be shown of you in a bikini or revealing side boob. No upskirt photos or anything unflattering. No gossip vaguely designed as a blind item. If you are Lindsay Lohan's publicist, this is the week to get in touch. For one week it will be the most sunshiney, happ happiest stories I can find about you and your life.

Yes, the article is about Matthew McConaughey and how he woos women. No word on if this would be the same if he wooed men. The reason I linked to the story is that the man owns three trailers and he picks and chooses which one each lady will get to visit. If any other man said, "honey I got three double-wides and one of them has your name all over it" that woman would be out of there unless you were paying her or giving her one of the trailers. Do you think he bought them or took them from his movies? Are they themed by movie role or by sexual escapade?

Another wedding in which no one really cares. Courtney Thorne-Smith got married last weekend in which it appears that the only people present were the couple and the official marrying them. You know it is bad when the press does not care if you got married. But isn't even worse when your family does not care enough to come? And why did they get a confidential marriage license? If they had gone the regular route, they might have earned the crawl on E. In this scenario, they just get bloggers like me writing a few lines. Summer School seems so long ago when I had that crush.

Monday, January 08, 2007



This past weekend I was leaving one of my favorite restaurants in LA. I love a good steak and this place has the best. Like everyone else does here in LA, I was waiting in line for the valet. There were about four people ahead of my group. I had seen this actor inside, and although we are not friends, we certainly know each other enough to say hello. Throughout the evening I had seen this actor enjoying drink after drink and growing louder and louder. He was being obnoxious, but nothing out of the ordinary or worth a mention here. UNTIL, he and his companions emerged from the restaurant and proceeded to push their way through to the front of the valet line. For some reason there was only one valet working and so things were moving a little slow. However, everyone was in a good mood and no one was complaining because they could all see how hard the one valet was working. He was not walking anywhere. He was running flat out. The valet looked to be in his mid 20's and was from Mexico. His English was poor which was going to cost him in a few minutes. When our actor came outside, the valet was not there because he was running to get a car. This immediately sent Mr. Ass into a rant about how no one has good service anymore and he had a movie opening soon and companies just did not value customer service.

So, the valet comes back with a car and now there are three people ahead of my group and the first in line prepares to give his ticket to the valet. The valet is about to grab it, when Mr. Ass says, "Hold it, I need to go first. I have a talk show I am supposed to do in twenty minutes." Well it is almost 11pm and no one is buying that story. The valet did not really understand what Mr. Ass was saying, just that there was an angry man getting more angry by the minute right in his face. The valet kind of gave a half smile and a shrug, and went back to the person who was first. At that point, Mr. Ass decided to play the do you know who I am card. I hate that card and to have this almost A lister recite what he has done and is doing to a man who did not understand a word was really humorous if you were not being the guy yelled at. It is so LA and so annoying. At that point, Mr. Ass lost it and his friends were trying to slink away. Mr. Ass said he would just go get his car himself and where were all the damn keys. The valet pointed and Mr. Ass got his keys and then asked where the cars were parked. It turns out the cars were about two blocks away. That sent Mr. Ass into a rant about how could the cars be protected if they were that far away and there better not be any damage to his car, etc. BUT it was too far for him to bother with it and that the valet should get it NOW. Well, it looked like we were in for another outburst of yelling and screaming, but everyone agreed Mr. Ass should go first. We just did not have the guts to watch it and you could tell the valet just wanted to escape the wrath of Mr. Ass.

The valet got back a few minutes later with the vehicle and Mr. Ass actually had the nerve to say it’s about time. No tip, no manners, and not the first time. Needless to say, the valet made a ton of money off the rest of us, but Mr. Ass needs a good ass kicking.


This actress has not been in many things, but everyone will know her for all time anyway. Went from bit player to big star almost overnight. A lovely woman who never let her stardom give her a fat head like Mr. Ass up above. Anyway, it turns out that our actress has a habit. Every Monday she gets $500 in fives from the bank and over the course of the week gives it all away. She generally gives away $100 a day, five days a week. A homeless person asks for money, $5 and she just keeps on repeating this over and over. She knows how lucky she is to be where she is and never wants to forget where she came from. Each day as she runs into people who ask, and in LA there are plenty, she never says no and always gives $5. Homeless people who have no idea what she does for a living, just know she is someone they can always count on for a kind word and that $5. Just in her $5 plan she gives away almost $26,000 a year. She does not do it for publicity and obviously does not get receipts. She does not try and claim it on her taxes. She does it just because she cares. The $26,000 is not a bunch of money, but it is 5,200 people she has helped over the course of the year. She has looked in their eyes and knows she has a made a difference.

In reality, the $26,000 is not all she does in public. From Thanksgiving until Christmas, she raises the $5 to $20 and for one month, she gives away about $400 a day. Each person she runs into gets a $20 bill which can mean several days of food or even half the cost of a hotel room. Homeless people stop and thank her and quite often do not ask for the money again. They instead bring other people or tell her a story of what happened after she gave them some money. It is truly incredible what she does each and everyday, no matter where in the world she is. What makes it even more incredible is this story which I have heard once or twice before was a topic of conversation during the dinner with Mr. Ass.

This is the first Monday of the year that has actually been a workday, and I have to say I kind of like it the other way better. I have some gossip for you of course and later today either some regular blind items or Jackass v Kindness. I saw some truly incredible asinine celebrity behavior over the weekend and so thought it would be a good idea to share. If I can find the time to write, then you get it today, otherwise tomorrow. Truly asinine.

Chris Robinson was forced to do the "Tara." In case you do not know what the Tara is, it is the walk of shame after being denied admittance to Hyde right in front of all the pap and the gawkers which Tara Reid was wrongly subjected to. It would have been much nicer to call it the "Paris." Honestly, Hyde is not really Chris' kind of place. Still though, the Tara is bad. What is worse, is the Tara with a twist which would involve Kate Hudson showing up at the same time ala "she who must not be named" and having her get in while you watch. Then there is the Tara with a twist with a slice of video which means it is out there to remind you forever and ever. Chris did not have the twist, but there is video when you click the link.

I do not really know how helping a woman out of a car and helping take her to a midwife is delivering a baby, BUT it makes for good press for the reality show that will have LaToya Jackson serving as a police officer along with Erik Estrada and Jack Osbourne. I really do not know where this show places in the hierarchy of reality television but at least it is a place for those celebrities who missed out on Celebrity Boxing. Do they get to have guns in this show?

In my attempt to move further down the D list in gossip reporting, Alan Cumming was married this weekend to his boyfriend of two years. Alan Cumming is a very fine actor and a lovely man, but Marc Malkin the reporter on E thinks he got the biggest scoop in the world by hearing about this first. Alan Cumming's rep probably made 50 calls about it before someone would even pick up the phone. I am happy for Alan, but Marc, calm down. You could have reported this a month from now and been the first. Marc probably ran down the halls at E yelling, "I got an exclusive. OMG Alan Cumming is getting married, and he is going to wear an oatmeal colored linen kilt suit with a black shirt and tie. OMG, I have to tell someone. Where is Ted?"

He who must not be named for another week is in talks to star in a movie with Kelly Brook. I honestly do not know what insurance company would take the risk with this movie, so these talks are probably just going to be that. Just talks.

I think Kylie Minogue is probably the number one gay icon. However, I still think this poll is messed up because Dolly Parton is number two and ABBA is number 3. "Um, excuse me. Cher? Madonna? Barbra?

Is Wentworth Miller gay? The Prison Break star insists he is not but loves that men and women fantasize about him, as long as they keep watching the show.

Daryl Hannah says she almost became a sex slave. She managed to escape out a window or else she fear she would have been forced to remain in Las Vegas and be in a sex slave ring. While she was staying in the hotel, they must have volunteered quite a bit of information to her. So, because of her close escape, she is going to take a camera crew and travel all over the world looking at brothels. I am sure no one at the brothel will wonder what the 6 ft mermaid is doing there and what she wants with a girl for the night. Seriously, I think it is a noble quest and I wish her the best, but am not sure she is the right person for the job.


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