Friday, March 07, 2008

Four For Friday

Full Frontal Friday promises to be even bigger than last week. More from today and yesterday's stars. There will be enough twigs and berries and franks and beans to make all of you happy. Look for that in a few hours.

#1 & 2 - So we have a female singer with many millions of albums sold who has always been in straight relationships. Oh, and it is not like her relationships have been quiet. They have been some really huge ones. People know who she dates. Never a hint or whisper of our singer aver being anything other than straight. Then along comes a C list television and film actress. Everyone knows her name, and most of you have seen the television shows she has been a regular in. What we have never done is see her with any guys. Oh, every now and then she might drag a guy to a premiere, but never anything serious. She has already been in one secret relationship with a woman on an ABC primetime show, and now she is in a committed, although secret relationship with our singer. Not a secret to their close friends, just to the rest of the outside world. It is leaking slowly though and will be out soon.

#3 - Breathing a huge sigh of relief are the producers of this hit reality show. In what would have been another embarrassment for the show, one of the female contestants who has been voted off the show is pregnant.

#4 - This married A list film actress by name, but with a body of work that makes her B list, unless of course we are talking about her actual body, then it might be a B+ spent most of her time at a charity event and a store opening away from all her fans. Even though she was being paid big bucks to attend each event, she spent most of the evening doing line after line with her "assistant" who is a good looking guy, but doesn't speak English or appear to do anything but keep our actress company.

Random Photos Part One

No clue here. Just been a really long time since I saw Andrew Shue anywhere. He looks pretty good right?
The new poster for Iron Man.
When she wants to actually try, Charlize Theron still looks amazing. Amazing I tell you.
The Chemical Brothers - Sydney
This is Carla Bruni naked in GQ. Let us all close our eyes for a second and imagine Laura Bush naked in GQ. Not quite the same thing is it?
Christina Aguilera in one of her new ads. Finally a place that her hooker makeup fits right in.
Another blast from the past. Lynn Whitfield. Remember when she was like the next big thing? Unfortunately there are lots of other people that you can apply that very same sentence to.
Wow. So the hero to all these little girls is Lindsay Lohan. Nice. They then went and purchased Paris Hilton perfume and Amy Winehouse wigs to cap off their day.
Julieta Venegas - Mexico City
Juanes - New York City
Jeremy Piven is doing Broadway now. Guess he ran out of women in LA. He looks good though.
Soulja Boy - London
Which one is Robert Downey Jr.?
Yep. This should be interesting.
Nick Cave - New York City
Thank you Mischa Barton. Before I begin ragging on Mischa, I want to make it perfectly clear that this is not on the set of a new film. Nor is Mischa wearing this on the way to a costume party or some kind of Sienna Miller tribute party. She is not auditioning for a role in Hair, and she doesn't like to be called Pocahontas when she has sex. I think that has it covered except for the fact that she wore this to lunch, on a patio and got the guy she was with to make out with her while she was wearing it.
I just love this picture. I hate Elmo, but love this photo. Will Arnett cracks me up by doing nothing.
Victoria Beckham in Vogue
The Teenagers - London
Haven't seen Sharon Lawrence in awhile. She always looks the same.
This bright smiling face actually sleeps with Corey Feldman each night. Why don't you trade with her for a weekend and see if you can force out a smile like that.

Rebecca Loos Is Evil

You remember when David Beckham allegedly cheated on Posh with Rebecca Loos? I remember it, but was never really sure what happened. Rebecca insists it still happened, but that her new song called Your Boyfriend which talks about men who cheat because their women don't pay attention to them is not about David Beckham. No, of course not. It just came to her as a vision while she was sleeping.

"Of course it’s not about David Beckham. The song has nothing to do with the Beckhams at all. It’s not a dig at Victoria - I’d never, ever do that.

"I had a relationship with David, who was married, but I never tried to steal him or take him away from Victoria. And David is still with her - I’m not a marriage wrecker. They are still married and so strong together.

I love the part about how she is not a marriage wrecker. She admits she had an affair with him while he was married, but because they are still together she is not technically a marriage wrecker. Love that logic. That is some serious rationalization on her part.

It gets better though in Rebecca's crazy world. "I recorded it two years ago as a p*ss-take and it was never supposed to be released. Now it’s the most listened-to song on the internet. We haven’t got a clue how it’s ended up on the web - we’re trying to find out who leaked it.

"But who has a better singing voice, me or Victoria? I couldn’t possibly say."

I haven't got a clue who leaked it either, but I bet it might be someone with the initials RL. Just a guess. Maybe while she is looking she can find the real killers too. How hard do you think she is looking? Also, I have never even heard the song, but if all of you have listened to it then I would think it is the most downloaded song on the internet. My guess is that she has some computers in her house that are busy downloading it 24/7.

I want you to know that I had to go through almost 5 pages of photos before I found one of Rebecca that didn't have her naked or showing off her breasts to anyone who wanted a look.

You Know Today Must Be Slow

God help me, but I am about to write a post about some guy Jennifer Aniston is dating. I know, I know. Who cares? I don't even care, but I am going to prattle on here for a few minutes and talk about how she is dating a grip from that film Traveling In Vancouver. Considering that she is already filming a new movie which will go straight into the toilet like the others, she must have liked this guy enough to meet him in LA. The guy's name is Brian Boruma and I am sure he is loving the attention, unless of course he is married. Even if he is married he probably is loving the attention. Do you think Jen puts out on the first date? I am asking this because it seems so rare that she actually goes out with anyone a second time. The media just loves trying to put her with different guys.

On the set of the film Jennifer was allegedly dating Aaron Eckhart, but obviously that didn't take since she is with this guy for the next few days. For his part, Boruma says, "I don't want to talk about that." Well at least he can keep his mouth shut. For now. Give him a week and a plane ticket back home and he will be spilling. Not that I will care.

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which macho singer faced being dumped over his girlie habit of painting his fingernails?

His girlfriend wouldn't have minded so much if he hadn't insisted on using her favourite Chanel limited edition red.

Didn't Know Even Know She Was Still Alive

Turns out that Kathie Lee Gifford is alive. I didn't really know, because honestly I wasn't looking for her, and that big career she was planning after Regis really panned out for her didn't it? I know, someone will comment or e-mail me and say she is on some show that no one watches or that she is on Broadway or doing this and that. Whatever. In my world she isn't alive. I can't think of a morning I woke up and said to myself, damn I miss Kathie Lee Gifford. Apparently the world does not think like me, or at least NBC executives anyway.

Seems that NBC has decided that Kathie Lee Gifford is going to be the host for the fourth hour of the Today show each morning. You do realize four hours of the same show means NBC basically devotes 20% of it's entire programming to one show. Why not just have a Today Show cable channel and then in the mornings the rest of us can sit down in the mornings, put our feet up and watch a little Mixed Martial Arts.

I hate morning shows. I don't need anyone smiling at me or being in a good mood at the butt crack of dawn while I am struggling to decide why in fact I do work for a living, and how anyone could ever be that cheery. Oh, they get paid that's right.

Anyway, in a move that is either brilliant or misguided. Covering myself there huh? I think it will work for awhile and then everyone will remember why they stopped liking her in the first place. An announcement is expected in the next two weeks. Wonder if it will be on Regis. You know I think she did that show for 15 years. How old is Regis anyway? OK. I looked it up. He is 76. Wow. It seems like he should be even older. In case you were curious, Kathie Lee is 114.

Who Cares If It Is True

You remember Ashley Cole don't you? He is the star soccer player from the UK who has repeatedly cheated on his wife, Cheryl Cole or Cheryl Tweedy from Girls Aloud. Surprising many in the world Ashley actually cheated on Cheryl with other women. I actually thought the guy preferred dudes, and maybe he does but was more careful with them. So he and Cheryl had a big fight, she moved out, and now wants to move back in, but only if Ashley sells the house they currently live in. Cheryl has visions of being the next Posh and wants fame more than any other person on earth. OK, everyone clear and up to date? Do I need to talk about the other girls in Girls Aloud? I am sure they have a wiki entry if you want to catch up. Just remember that Nicola drinks if you call her ugly, or the ugly one.

Now, the good part of the story. According to The Mirror which I love because they sent me a very nice note, Ashley Cole's mom is making Ashley apologize individually to each and every member of the Tweedy family for being a cheater. He also then has to apologize to each and every member of his own family. Of course this could be right up there with the selling the house thing, so I don't know if he would go through with it unless he was going to get back with Cheryl.

You know that show Cheaters right? Do they have it outside the US? If not, it is a show that gets a tip from a person who feels like they are being cheated on, and then the show follows the other person to see if it is true or not. Since it is television, they are always caught cheating, and there is always a huge confrontation at the end. I would love Celebrity Cheaters. Yes, the paps will get a photo every once in a while, but I want the full television crew and the night vision following them around. That would be great. It could be D or even E listers I don't think anyone would care. It would be better than watching Flavor Of Love 14.

As far as this whole Cheryl and Ashley thing goes, I don't think there are anymore stories that can be rung out of it. I think it is done until Ashley cheats again, or Cheryl cuts his hamstring while he is sleeping.

Madonna Is A Jackass

So in case you didn't know, and honestly you probably didn't, the Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame Show is on Monday night. Although the Hall Of Fame has basically screwed itself over the past few years by not inducting groups and singers it should have and thus removing itself from any kind of hope that you will find the show live on television anywhere, it has always promised one thing. That unless someone is close to death, dead, or the biggest asshole in the world, they will play live at their induction ceremony. Apparently no one told Madonna this, and so she just plans to put her smug ass right down in a chair and let Justin "I'm A Big Ass Too" Timberlake introduce her and induct her and blather on and on about how wonderful she is.

So, who on earth is going to sing a medley of Madonna songs? Why Iggy Pop of course. Now I know we all love Iggy and if he sings Like A Virgin or Material Girl I think we will all laugh our asses off, but let us also ask why Mr. Pop is not in the Hall of Fame. Let us ask ourselves why we went from the 60's to the 80's in one swoop with these inductions. Where are all those 70's artists and disco pioneers who made us try to forget that the 70's were really a crappy decade despite what a television show based in Wisconsin would have you believe.

This induction show is so bad that unless you are one of the four people who has VH1 Classic you won't be able to watch this show until March 22nd and then only on VH1. That is a Saturday by the way, so I am sure you will stay at home that Saturday night and hang out with the kids watching Madonna look haughty with her fake accent, and teeth and face that seem to get more haggard by the week.

Is performing in front of your peers for free that shameful? Is it just the fact that you are performing for free that you detest? I thought music was supposed to bring the world together. So, instead on the show performing you have Iggy (not in the Hall) Patti LaBelle (not in the Hall) Lou Reed (In the Hall, but doing Leonard Cohen music so you never know) and John Mellencamp. Yes, John is getting inducted, and guess what? He is actually going to perform, and he is bringing Billy Joel with him and trying to get others to come so that way Madonna and her band of sycophants don't ruin the entire thing for everyone there.

Below is a great video from one of the ceremonies with Aerosmith and Led Zeppelin performing together.

Converting The Strippers One Lap Dance At A Time

I guess Michael Lohan is taking this ministry thing seriously. For his latest crusade he and two guy friends went to Rick's Cabaret in New York to convert strippers. So when I read that last sentence I think of Michael and his two friends outside the club, standing on a soapbox, railing against the imagined sins of the dancers, and how their evil customers should be living a more wholesome life.

Well apparently when you get ordained from some place off the internet, they teach you a different way to convert people. According to the National Enquirer, what Michael and his friends did was to go ahead and spend a few hours inside the strip club. While Michael handed over a huge wad of Lindsay's hard earned cash to his friends so they could have lap dance after lap dance, Michael spent about an hour just talking to a dancer. He apparently never tipped her and never asked for a dance because he is a cheap bastard and was probably trying to get her to go home with him so he could get some for free. I really don't know if she did, but if she has the brains of anything larger than Paris Hilton than she probably went home straight after work and read all the bible verses that Michael was whispering in her ear.

Michael didn't drink, and he didn't get any lap dances from anyone. He did keep a very close eye on the lap dances his two friends were receiving and also managed to sneak a few peeks up on the stage because he is interested in putting a stripper pole in his house for Lindsay. What dad wouldn't want something like that for his daughter? OK. I know the answer is most, and I doubt that Michael is going to install one in his house. I mean what would be the point. You just know that Dina already has one at her house.

Ted C Blind Item

Vicky Vamp Void recently had some work done to her famed bod, though we think her old mug is just as shrugworthy as her new one. The unnecessary surgery seemed completely cosmetic, but ya never know—cocaine does do some pretty rancid damage to the ol’ septum, boys ‘n’ girls. Stick to Diet Rockstar, kiddos, ‘kay? Vicky has been spotted in the past casually snorting the white stuff at the Spider Club, the semiexclusive hot spot atop Hell-Ay’s Avalon. Spider might be a private place, but Vicks nonchalantly nosedived in front of tons of spying eyes like it was no big deal. Usually, it sure ain’t, since who's left in T-town to throw stones at when everyone’s taken a sniff or two time and time again? But so it goes when you’re a superceleb. Your fun night out becomes game for goss, fer sure—not that getting caught with coke could sink this supposed young role model’s rep much lower.

Recently, VVV’s been seen around just about every hip hang with her intriguing, sexually mysterious partner in crime, Humpy Harlow. The tingling twosome are more than happy to parade in front of the paps, soaring as high as weather balloons. But why is H2, a heretofore pretty iconoclastic star, going along for the Us Weekly upchuck ride? Dunno. Might have something do with the fact that, prior to being attached to V3’s barely there notoriety, Hump was known to not exactly party.

Just a hunch there. But, uh, look for Harlow’s brand-new puss, too, sometime in ’09, we suspect.

Guess H.H. has picked up some average (and lethal) Hell-Ay habits from this wild child gal-pal.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Today's Blind Items With Another Mini- Kindness

#1 This 60 something B list for his entire film career was out to dinner two nights ago with a woman not related to him, (unless sharing tongues is accepted in their family) who was carded when she asked for a drink. As the waiter asked the question, the blood drained from our actor's face. He tried to stop her from showing her i.d, saying that she really didn't need a drink, but it was already out. 17, but the good news she was almost 18. July actually.

#2 This good looking B list film actor who is making an awful mistake if the recent stories of his love life are true is the subject of this mini kindness. A teacher was walking through the lobby of a building when he spotted our actor waiting for the elevator. The teacher is a high school teacher and he recognized the actor immediately. He approached him and said, "Hi, I'm a big fan of yours and I show your movie (fill in the blank) to my high school Government classes." The actor shook his hand and thanked him and then asked why he would show his students that movie. And this is where the teacher could tell our actor was a decent human being. The elevator opened up, actor looked at it, looked back at the teacher and said, "There will be another one. Tell me about your class." The teacher explained what the movie brought to his students and they spent another ten minutes talking with our actor saying he might have enjoyed his Government classes when he was in school, if only he'd had such a teacher.

Random Photos Part One

I don't know how Bradley Cooper made it to the top, but it is not really a bad thing. Did I ever tell you that sometimes when it is not a regular on top, it is actually a clue to a blind item from the past.
I really like Evermore. Nothing else other than that. Just thought I would share that I liked them.
Delta Goodrem - Sydney
Congratulations to Christian Siriano on winning Project Runway. Now he and Chris Kattan can film a remake of Twins.
I saw RV last night, and yet, I still like Cheryl Hines. She looks like she has been working out.
Now someone tell me again why Beth Ostrosky is still with Howard Stern? Oh yeah. The money.
Mandy Moore- Sydney
I like Lea Thompson a lot. I just wish she wouldn't try and bring back the Macarena all by herself. Long way to go for that joke huh? She did have some really nice things to say about Patrick Swayze at this event. Like she would say anything bad. I mean is she going to call the guy an ass? I don't think so. I would also like to tell the NY Post at this time to shut up about Patrick's rep lying to you about Patrick's condition. There are medical privacy laws in this country, and I am glad they lied. So the NY Post needs to STFU.
Kelly Clarkson - Sydney
I am glad to see that so far at least Gabriel Alexander has not inherited his father's baldness genes.
Hellen Keller and Anne Sullivan in a new photo that was released. Amazing.
I guess Shannon Elizabeth just took that Persian rug from her foyer, wrapped it around her and called it a dress.
Wow. This is just not a good look for Rachel McAdams. At all.
Nor for Paul Giamatti. It's ok to wear t-shirts guys, especially if you are going to be showing off your pasty white chest.
OK. Three in a row. I have never seen a worse photo of Portia de Rossi and remember she is one of my fantasies. Not so much anymore.
Love the vacant look that Michelle Trachtenberg has. There are no thoughts running through that head.
How about some Zachary Quinto?
Or perhaps you enjoy Zachary Levi better?
Well the people have been pretty fug all the way through so why should Katie and Tom be any different? Katie Holmes has a nice body, but she always is wearing these smocks.
Steven Strait looks ok.
Sean Kingston - Sydney

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which wealthy TV presenter is so concerned about his thinning locks that he has secretly visited a top London hair-loss clinic to enquire about a transplant?

Fast And Furious Together Again

Michelle Rodriguez has just signed on for the Fast And The Furious 4 which means the entire original cast of the first film is in place. I know most of you probably hated the first film, but I actually thought it was pretty damn great and since this is my blog I have to say that I am pretty damn excited that the entire cast is coming back.

If Vin Diesel didn't get such a big ass head. Well, he does have a big head, so maybe I should have said, if Vin Diesel's ego didn't grow as large as his head, they would have done this film five years ago. Instead I will have had to wait 8 years between the two. Here is the list of the people who made the worst career choices ever in order of time. Shelley Long, David Caruso, Ben Affleck, Vin Diesel. Yes, there are others, but these are people who gave up great roles they were already in. You don't think that has crossed Matt Damon's mind a few times and played a big part in him signing on to do more Bourne films. You don't give up the franchise roles. David has made his way back to where he was and maybe above. Ben Affleck is more well known, but hasn't had a great role in a long time.

I am sure Vin Diesel is hoping this will put him in the David Caruso column rather than the Shelley Long column.

Hugh Hefner Has Not Lost His Mind

White Oprah has made a dramatic comeback. I was really enjoying not seeing Dina Lohan very much. It was kind of peaceful actually. Now that a network was dumb enough to give her a reality show we will have her thrust upon us much as she has thrust herself upon so many others. Can you imagine how much we are going to have to put up with her when she starts doing publicity for the show? Are you ready to see her whenever you turn on your television or open a magazine at the checkout counter?

You know the network gave her the show so that Lindsay would show up and they could watch the self destruction of Ali in person. Do you really think that anyone in this world gives a rat's ass what Dina Lohan does? Me either.

Dina is good for a quote though. Much like her ex is. Unlike her ex though, most of the time Dina waits for the phone to ring and isn't the one making the call. Dina has denied that Hugh Hefner and Playboy offered Lindsay money to get naked. They must know that Lindsay will get naked for food. She even has a sign that she wears on the exit ramps of highways.

What this shows me is that Hugh still has some sense. If he marries Holly Madison though that would be a big mistake. Don't do it Hugh. Not that you are reading this. I didn't mean to change the topic, and I really don't want the show that much, but Bridget seems more the marrying kind and Holly seems to be the one who will make sure you die without any money and try to take the company away from Hugh's daughter. Don't even get me started on the "sporty" one.

Now that Hugh has declined, I think Larry Flynt should call Lindsay. Dress her up like a nun or put her on a cross, and have her get naked. Larry has a huge wallet. It would be shocker.


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