Saturday, July 14, 2007

Random Photos

All the ho's Bret Michaels is going to take a shot at on his new show.

Would have never guessed this is Britney Spears' house. Where is the doublewide?

Lindsay leaving an AA meeting. Hey at least she's going.

Drew Barrymore in Vogue

Keira Knightley for Chanel's Coco Mademoiselle

Music News And Photos

Bert Jansch - Bridgewater Hall - Manchester, UK
Kasabian - Somerset House - London
John Legend - THISDAY Events Center - Lagos
GZA - Union Park - Chicago
Fantasia Barrino - Good Morning America - New York
Eagle Eye Cherry - 114 Hope Street - Cape Town
Sonic Youth - Union Park - Chicago
Supergrass - Stoke Park - Guildford, UK
Slint - Union Park - Chicago
Pop Levi - Somerset House - London
The Ordinary Boys - Stoke Park - Guildford, UK

Saturday Links

I don't know that I really care but Meg Ryan is secretly dating Matthew Perry. How can it be a secret if we are talking about it?

Nicole Richie discusses how she likes her franks cut if you know what I mean. Let's just say she likes them Kosher.

You know I think Aubrey from Danity Kane is a little pissed that Diddy just used her like any other woman he dates.

X17 is convinced Jennifer Garner is pregnant. I think I may have said something about that a few weeks ago. Of course now that I say that she will probably go out and get drunk off her ass.

A bunch of great inside scoop about Jack Nicholson. Did you know he made a pass at Nicole Kidman at The Oscars? Damn that would have been a good blind item.

Britney Spears bought a tennis racket while wearing this outfit. Now she only bought one so maybe she's going to use it for something else. I seem to recall an incident with a baseball bat but that was just method acting. Now she did take up tennis while at Promises. Didn't she play for ten whole minutes or something? Well, whatever it is, it should be fun. Photo courtesy of Just Jared just in case you couldn't tell with that big yellow frame.

That American Idol winner likes some other guy now. Can you imagine being a 17 year old girl and changing your mind about what guy you like? The nerve.

Friday, July 13, 2007

The Guy From Celebslam Is Really Good

After you read the transcript, then click here to read more details of the encounter.

A Little Equal Time

Don't want you to think I forgot about the gender of most of my readers. I already gave you nude photos of one guy this week. Tyson isn't naked here, but not far from it. See you tomorrow.

Four For Friday

#1 So this A list actor in name recognition and actually can open a movie on his own but you just don't really think of him as A list is getting a divorce although there was some question about whether they were really married. Anyway our mystery actor has been signing false tax returns for awhile and his wife didn't quite catch on until recently that he was hiding money from her. She finds out and then relationship go bye bye, and our actor better hope he doesn't go bye bye to prison.

#2 This parasite was seen giving a lap dance to a record producer you don't want to cross. A photo was taken of the incident and immediately the record producer's thugs grabbed the camera, took the memory card out and gave the camera back to the photographer.

#3 This A list actor is already very tired of his fairly new wife. The problem is his fans expect him to be a certain way and getting divorced from the mother of your child(ren) is not something they want to see. So, he puts on a happy face and tries to find other people to act as a buffer.

#4 Speaking of lap dances. Well not now, but in #2 anyway. This B list actor from a very long running television series which ended gracefully loves the strip clubs and loves the lap dances. What he doesn't do is tip though. He pays exactly the cost and nothing more and gets really upset if he feels the song is too short. All of the ladies are tired of his act especially since he said he was just doing it for research. Of course his research has been an almost every day for six months kind of research. His wife must be thrilled.

Random Photos Part Two

Jessica Alba licking an ice cream cone. I am a dirty old man and proud of it. Ooops. Don't spill sweetie.
Emma Roberts for Dooney & Bourke.
Just because they are not "dating" doesn't keep them from shacking up together at the Four Seasons.
How long exactly are they going to be in Prague?
7 foot 9 meet 2 foot 4. When you subtract the difference you still have someone taller than Tom Cruise. See, I can get the kids to learn. You don't really want me teaching them, but I can get them to learn.
It's like a mirror cracking.

I have no idea how this is supposed to sell hair extensions unless she's offering to throw in a free f**k to whoever pays for them.
One of these is a princess.
See, I've decided it's more like a David Niven mustache.
Seriously. Is she still pregnant? It's been like two years right?

Random Photos Part One

I could talk about bald heads or bald heads or why I am aroused when I look at this photo.
Whoops. There went any kind of arousal. In fact it's running for the hills. Has America come to the point where we are actually paying Kim Kardashian and Brandon Davis to host parties at a club? Seriously? I honestly don't think there will be a more horrendous photograph all year.
"I have some special, spicy rum just for you Amanda."
Nick still has that sunburned pornstar look going for him. But actually, I posted the pic because Kristin Davis actually looks normal, and pretty. Less makeup works for her. I'm actually attracted to her which is a first for her. Of course now that she knows that she will run away quickly. For some reason as soon as I say I like someone they think that I want to kidnap them and force them to bear my children so I do get many restraining orders issued against me. Sometimes there are just a line of process servers at the door all serving me papers from some woman or other I may have said hi to or called 67 times in a four hour period.

I think the force is no longer with Luke.
or with Jim Belushi. I know he wasn't in Star Wars although he could have been dressed up in a costume and who would have known. But, he was in a movie about a force. That's right the police force. Who could forget K-9? I actually like that movie although the Tom Hanks one was better because the dog was funnier although he and Mare Winningham getting together didn't make much sense. Of course a crime fighting dog doesn't make much sense either so I guess you have to accept it or not. Sylvester Stallone tried the same thing but used that old lady from the Golden Girls instead of a dog.

Elliott Yamin came in like 35th place on American Idol and he is dating Jamie Paetz? Maybe it's the teeth. I heard he got new ones. Think if I get some of mine replaced he would let me say hi to her?

Chuck And Larry Premiere (Warning: Extra Snarky)

Jackie gets the top spot because she got Adam to finally put on something besides shorts and a t-shirt. I think she may have had to give up her bra to win though.
I love Anna Faris, but what happened to her? Just a nose job or much more?
These are sisters and they look frisky. I'm feeling a little frisky. One of my blow up dolls popped this week so I've been kind of lonely. Someone asked me how I wanted the Duff sisters to pose? Like this, but with less clothes.
We're all thrilled you showed up too sweetie.

Jessica Biel looks good when she's really far away.
Because when you get up close it looks like someone broke her jaw and restructured her face.
Mr. Price Is Right.
Immediately after this photo was taken, Emmanuelle Chriqui went to the girls behind her and gave a lecture on the mysterious wonders of double sided tape.
Still living off that Thorn Birds thing huh?

Is Mickey Dolenz the Monkee with the really hot daughter?
A lesser man wouldn't have posed in front of Wetzel's Pretzels.
Acting skills like this should translate really well for her box office success.
They do kind of look like a very cute gay couple.
It's one thing for a couple to dress alike, but you have to love the fact they pulled it off in lime green.
No one saw Taylor Dayne for 20 years and now we can't get rid of her. Did I miss something? Did she get a show or an album or something?
Candace Bailey with her greatest acting challenge to date.
His career has come down to saying four words in each Adam Sandler movie.
I'm guessing they are all his and all headed one a one way ticket to spending all of dad's money and not working a day in their life.


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