Saturday, October 22, 2011

Sly Stone Has Checked Into Rehab

When you are 68 years old, I think it takes a lot of courage to go to rehab. It would be really easy at that point to just say forget it, I don't have much time left so why bother. Sly Stone has checked himself into Promises for his addiction to crack. Unlike most celebrities, Sly plans on staying a full 90 days to give himself the best chance of getting and staying sober. I also think he wants to have one last tour around the world and it is tough to do that when you can't let go of the pipe.

For the past year or so, Sly has been living in an RV on a residential street and basically getting supplies from a couple who let him park in front of their place. That is quite the fall. Hopefully this will get him back on his feet.

Seniors Having Sex In A Car Plea Deal

Last month, I chose to not write about the 71 year old woman being caught having sex with a 54 year old man in a car because I did not want to see the mugshots and then have the visual that went with it. I had to slowly work my way into it and I am now fully capable of discussing it although I must admit the woman who was arrested looks really happy in her mugshot. I guess being double the legal limit and having sex in a car in front of strangers in a restaurant parking lot will do that to you. Notice that the guy does not appear as thrilled.

The two were charged after people in the restaurant called police because they did not want to see the two having sex. When the police got there the couple was still having sex and the policeman noticed the car was rocking. You know I have to use the line, "when the car is rockin', don't come a knockin'." What kind of person would I have been if I did not use that line. Anyway, the best line though was when the policeman asked the man what he was doing. "I'm f**king this chick." Well, the policeman did ask. I guess the man could have said, "Here's your card."

The two were in court on Thursday and basically paid a fine and will have probation and some community service. Just don't let the two of them near a car together. Do you think the are still hooking up?

Mena Suvari To Play The Black Dahlia

Apparently American Horror Story is going to take a shot at figuring out the person who killed The Black Dahlia. I don't think it will ever be solved. Have they ever tried using DNA at all in this case? It happened back in 1947 so I don't know what kind of samples they even took back then or if they still exist. There have been so many theories as to who killed Elizabeth Short and why and I guess Ryan Murphy can go ahead and give it his best shot. At least what it will do is make more people aware of one of the greatest mysteries of Hollywood. I think it was the same person who committed the Lipstick Murders. If you have never read about those, you should.

Mitchel Musso Charged With DUI

You pretty much knew it was coming, but, yesterday Mitchel Musso was charged with two counts of drunken driving. This is because of last Sunday morning when he was pulled over by cops after he blew through an area where they were directing traffic without even slowing down. They had arrested the Hannah Montana star for driving under the influence and was officially charged on Friday. Musso is only 20, so he was underage too. If convicted he faces a maximum of 12 minutes of jail and two more appearances on TMZ.

Kate Winslet and Her Bra Or No Bra Decision While In A Fire

Kat Winslet will be on the Graham Norton show next Saturday. She taped it this week though and was asked about the whole fire down in the Caribbean where she saved the life of Richard Branson's mother. She says that when she was awakened by the fire, "It was genuinely very scary. We woke up at 4:30 in the morning to yelling that there was a fire. I jumped up and ran immediately towards the fire but then realized we might die so turned around, told my children to go in and shut the door and then thought, 'Now what do I do?' I ran into the bedroom and put on a bra. In disastrous moments like that, you do the strangest things. I started to put on a bra and thought 'No, that’s going to take me too long,' so off came the bra, on came the t-shirt, I grabbed the children and I picked up Granny."

So, I guess we learned that both Richard Branson and Kate Winslet both sleep naked but when he came out he did not even bother to put on anything. I usually just pass out in whatever I was wearing at the time I passed out. Great for most nights, not so much for Halloween when you are dressed as a pumpkin. I still think parts of me are asleep.

Bradley Cooper Stalking Jennifer Lopez?

US Weekly devotes their cover to Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lopez. Meh. The story is pretty empty and lame but at least it is not a Kardashian or Jennifer Aniston so that is a bonus. They will probably make up for it next week with some kind of double issue where one half is Jennifer Aniston and one half is Kim Kardashian both saying "I'm Pregnant." Then down at the bottom will be a picture of Angelina Jolie with a little cartoon bubble saying, "Me too."

So, apparently Jennifer Lopez and Bradley had dinner last month in New York and then she went down to Florida to work on a movie because some producer probably thought he had a shot at her so paid her a bazillion dollars to make his movie bomb. The day after she went to Florida, Bradley went down and checked into the same hotel so he could continue pursuing the romance. The movie was being filmed in Miami. Doesn't Jennifer have a couple of houses in Miami? So why is she checking into a hotel. Again, probably the producer thought it would be easier, if he could say lets go back to the hotel instead of can I come over to your place.

The story does not say what happened after Bradley got there so yeah, it is kind of flat but probably sold some issues. What we need is for The Enquirer to pay some big bucks to Jennifer Esposito and have her spill. That is some seriously good stuff.

Ashton Kutcher Tries To Get Serious - Talks About Lies In The Press

Apparently Ashton Kutcher is not just about having sex with as many people while married as possible. For now he has taken a break in his quest to break Tiger Woods' celebrity record and is focusing on trying to save Two And A Half Men which has nosedived in the ratings the past two weeks and I guess he is trying to save his marriage. I don't know. I do know he probably owns part of chimein which seems to be kind of like Twitter for videos. Like u-share but with followers and everything. Ashton has a new video he posted where he rambles on and on about how literature used to cost a lot to produce so it was all true and now it is free so it is not true. Huh. He must have forgotten that an entire war (Spanish-American) was started by literature that was not true and at the time it was still expensive to produce. I am assuming that when he refers to literature he means news, because there has been fiction in literature forever. I don't think much news has ever been referred to as literature. I am sure the people over the The Globe would love to have people refer to their paper as literature. Anyway, if you want to see his ramble which he does without his wedding ring, click here.

Prince Harry's US Girlfriend

For those of you in the San Diego area, I still think there is time for you to get your hands on Prince Harry, but you better hurry. Harry has already had three dates with Jessica Donaldson who works as a waitress at a club. She met Harry in the VIP area at the club where she works and they went out the next day to a different club together and he has also taken her to lunch. Lunch huh? That is a big step, especially when you have only met someone at night in darkened clubs. Lunch is the harsh daylight of the world. People have been really into me in dark clubs and then get me in daylight at a buffet and they cannot believe I am the same person. One time a person actually thought she was on Candid Camera and that I was not the same person from the night before. I think drinking probably plays a role in their short term memory recall.

Jessica is 26 and obviously enjoys tattoos. Her friends call her Jes. So, chances of becoming a Princess?

Taylor Armstrong Getting Fired From Real Housewives

The writing was already kind of the walls yesterday when Taylor Armstrong gave an interview to Access Hollywood. First, in the interview she lied about dating Matt Nordgren. She said she was not when everyone knows they are and her whining about how it is not soon enough to date is crap considering she was dating plenty while her ex was alive. When they asked her about returning to Real Housewives, it allowed Taylor to plant a seed when she said she had to decide if it was good for her daughter or not. Do you really think she has cared about that for the past two seasons? Please. It is just giving her an out for when she is fired and The Enquirer says she already has been fired and will not be returning next season. I honestly would not mind her coming back. She will be dating people and will have no money so it would be interesting to watch that play out on the show.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Random Photos Part Three

A Taxi reunion of Tony Danza and Judd Hirsch gets the top spot.
This could be life changing. Anna Wintour smiling.
Cheryl Cole makes fun of Hollywood.
Carla Gugino has kind of faded into the background again.
Christian Louboutin made this bar for Elton John so it can be auctioned.
Courtney Stoddard and her grandfather head over to MTV to pitch their reality show called, "I Hope My Husband Does Not Break His Hip Or I Will Have To Go Back To High School."
Dianna Agron at the Chateau Marmont yesterday.
Drew Barrymore kisses her new guy.
Elizabeth Hurley. Tell me again why she is famous.
Karina Smirnoff. Still showing off the engagement ring.

Random Photos Part Two

Yesterday I showed you photos from the chocolate fashion show. I missed this one though where things kind of melted. Fell apart? Free chocolate on the runway kids!
I just really like this photo. If they were actually in love rather than just in an arrangement it would be better.
Carrie Underwood goes all flannel for her husband and Jeff Foxworthy and Michael W Smith.
Whoa. You kind of have to use that line with Joey Lawrence all the time don't you?
Justin Timberlake and Amanda Seyfried pose and then get the heck away from each other as quickly as possible. Justin was at this after party with Jessica Biel by the way.
Kate Bosworth shows off her new guy, Michael Polish.
Katherine Heigl gets dressed up to pump gas.
70's garage sale outfit?
Lady GaGa as Audrey Hepburn.

Random Photos Part One

Three parts today.

Val and Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Carson Kressley enjoying what looks like a lot of wine.
Michelle Monaghan and Aaron Eckhart having a great time.
Never before seen photos of Marilyn Monroe when she was filming River Of No Return in Banff back in 1953.

Olivia Wilde and Matt Bomer get best looking couple of the day award.
Rihanna about to get mobbed in front of her Paris hotel.
Reese Witherspoon must have her own personal pap because there is not a day that goes by where she does not have her photo taken.
Whenever I see a photo of Steve Guttenberg I either get the urge to watch Party Down or his jog through Central Park, but after seeing Michael Winslow yesterday, I think it might be time to revisit Police Academy this weekend.
Wow those are some large earrings. It is like she is ready for horseshoes anywhere she goes.

Your Turn

While looking through photos for Random Photos I saw one of Karina Smirnoff where she is wearing her engagement ring. She says it is just postponed. I think it ends soon. Also this week Crystal Harris sold her engagement ring she got from Hef. So, my question is this. If an engagement ends do you give the ring back? Do guys want the ring back? What happens if you are have spent money on the wedding already? Dress? What do you do?

Sally Draper Counsels Child Stars

Kiernan Shipka takes on some of the problems facing the child stars of today and yesterday.

Ted C Blind Item

I live for a gal who's survived in the movies—shown she has what it takes to star in many of them, some even successful—and then totally reinvents herself afterwards.

That's right, for a second career as a TV star! Of course, where else is there for movie chicks who age, but, that's beside the point.

Which is that Barbie Sinatra started reinventing herself long before she dipped into TV fare by...

Totally changing her appearance. We mean totally.

Whereas many folks guessed about Barbie's nips here and tucks there, we're here to tell you it was all due to nose-candy, baby!

That's right, Barbie, who got famous with an entirely different figure than the one she possesses now, decided she wanted what the rest of the chicas had in Hollywood, i.e., lots more acting opportunities. And Barbie's more natural appearance she got famous with just wasn't cutting it enough.

The drugged-out Pygmalion stuff worked pretty well for awhile, too.

But, just like all addictions, Barbie's coke habit eventually got the better of her and that primo TV gig she landed as a result of her new-found frame is about to be cancelled—not in the least because Barbie's coke-fuelled scenes of over-acting. I mean, Barb gives new meaning to the term scenery-chewing, as she also eats her costars alive, too, hysterical stuff!

Only it's not a comedy she's starring in, dearies!

And It Ain't: Teri Hatcher, Eva Longoria, Jessica Lange

Lewis Hamilton and Nicole Scherzinger Officially Call It Quits

I guess Nicole Scherzinger must be dating someone because she made sure to tell the tabloids that she and Lewis Hamilton have split. Hey, whatever. He has been seeing other people forever and this thing was over a long time ago. I have never really understood the need to make a public statement about not dating someone anymore. When you do that you are essentially saying, "I want everyone to know about my love life so please pay attention to me and who I date next."

Who really cares? Oh sure, there is some interest in the Jennifers of the world whether it be Lopez or Aniston. Also the Jessicas of the world whether it be Biel or Simpson. How long do you have to date someone before you make a public announcement of a split? How long would it be before you would tell your friends about splitting with someone? Apparently because Nicole is on the X Factor she thinks we should know that she is single. Great. Thanks for sharing.

Christina Aguilera Has Given Up

You know that Seinfeld episode where George is wearing sweats everyday and it was said that because of this he had given up. Was not going to try anymore, and was just content to wear sweats and eat cheese all day. When I see the photos of Christina Aguilera as of late I see a woman who just does not care anymore. It was kind of like when Britney Spears would walk into gas station bathrooms in her bare feet and would never take shower or brush her hair. She gave up. This is not Christina coming out of a dance rehearsal or from the gym. This is Christina coming out of a store. In the middle of the day. During the week. While not on vacation. Is she just giving up on pants for all time. Does she have some horrific rash that needs to breathe? Does she feel that wearing something over her underwear is contributing to the 1% and she wants to be in the 99%? Does she not have anything that fits? Give me some reason why she is doing this.

41 Year Old Ronald Reagan Had Sex With 16 Year Old Piper Laurie

Piper Laurie has a book coming out on November 1st and The Enquirer got an advance copy. In the book, Piper claims that she lost her virginity at 16 years old and lost it to Ronald Reagan who was 41 at the time and playing her father in a movie. That last part is kind of creepy. Well, so is a 41 year old guy having sex with a 16 year old, especially since his daughter was not that far away in age at the time. Piper had been warned about staying away from Reagan and not going in his dressing room but when he asked her to dinner she said yes. Of course it was at his place because, come on she was 16 and he was 41. Although, I guess that is better than the 51-16 ration of Courtney Stoddard and her husband.

Anyway, Reagan was divorced at the time but was dating Nancy Davis. When they got to his apartment he took her in the back way so no one would notice her and then fed her hamburger and wine and had sex with her. Apparently he had no idea she was a virgin, was shocked she didn't have an orgasm, let alone multiple ones and she probably needed to see a doctor because something was obviously wrong with her. Oh, and he also pointed out to her that he lasted for 40 minutes so she could note that for future posterity.

Four For Friday

#1 & #2- I don't even know why this couple even bothered to get engaged. You would know the female. Actress/model/foreign born. Oh, and getting older. She is cheating with her ex-boyfriend who is an A list actor and of course was having sex with her even while she was still married. Oh, and she is having sex with her soon to be ex-husband too. As for her boyfriend, anyone he can find at anytime.

#3 - This week at a daytime party no less, this way under age tween (B- list movie actress) who has been in this spot before was so drunk that she could not even make it to the bathroom before puking. She left shortly thereafter with her much older boyfriend.

#4 & #5 & #6- All three of these people are foreign born. So, what happens when you take a B- list movie actor who is known for wanting to have sex with anyone despite his not really good looks with a B-/C+ actress who is from a well known family and has done a mix of movies which tend to be foreign and television which tends to be American? You get some wild sex on the set of their movie. Hey, neither are married so it is all good. What makes it juicy is supposedly the director likes to watch.

Teresa Giudice Is Crazy

I have to admit that I have now watched the first part of the Real Housewives - New Jersey reunion show twice. I just can't get enough. I could literally watch Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice go at it all day. The best part about the reunion is that Andy Cohen just can't believe most of the crap that comes out of Teresa's mouth. I love how with all the bankruptcy and criminal case questions, Teresa just plays all innocent and how everyone knows the real answer, including Andy, but Teresa just sits there and lies. It is one thing when no one knows the truth, but everyone already knows the deal made by Teresa and her husband but she is just in another world.

I still am not sure how a guy who is bankrupt and working at a pizza place can suddenly find $300K sitting around to pay off one debt and how exactly Teresa can come up with $11M or as she says $8M to pay off her bills. She does not make that much. Yes, she makes a good living but she is not anywhere near the Kardashian world of money and even they would be hard pressed to come up with that much money in a year. I figure it would take Teresa another 3 years to come up with that money.

Oh, and when Andy asks, "so you withdrawing your bankruptcy kept you and your husband out of jail right?" Teresa acts like there was never going to be jail. Yes there was which is why you withdrew from the bankruptcy in the first place. Because it was fraud. The court papers say it but she just kept saying no while taking that one finger and adjusting her hair. She does it in the most annoying way. It is like she is saying f**k you everytime she does it.

National Enquirer Blind Item

THIS 50-something, Oscar-winning film star recently left her cheating husband in NYC and moved to Los Angeles with their three kids. The theater- trained performer dumped her hubby after learning about his mistress! Who is she?

Brooke Mueller Moves Out Of Charlie Sheen's House

Apparently Brooke Mueller was not a fan of Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards hanging out in New York together and has packed up herself and their twin sons to a house in the valley. According to Radar, Brooke had been hoping Charlie was going to buy her a house after she sold her last one for a loss. Well, I have seen people on crack selling cars for like $100 so it does not surprise me she sold her house for $1.1M less than what she asked just so she could get her hands on the money. To go from that to a rental is kind of sad. The good news is that she is allegedly sober. I say allegedly because the report comes her friends and I doubt they are going to say, "yeah, she is as high as a kite and has been tweaking for three days straight while chanting winning."

Filming Has Ended - Kris Humphries Moves Out And Takes Off Ring

The new season of Kourtney and Kim Take New York or whatever it is called has finished filming. So, yesterday Kris Humphries packed up the hotel where he had been staying with Kim Kardashian and did so without his wedding ring on. Later in the day, while not moving boxes, but getting a pedicure he also was not wearing it. I wonder how many NBA players get pedicures. Anyway, there is no need for them to be a couple until and unless the cameras roll for another season. Considering that Kim's agent dropped Kris, I am guessing this could be the last season for the show. Actually, I hope and pray it is the last season of the show.

BuzzFoto Blind Item

This D list actor, who is most well known for being a son on a sitcom that was on during the late 80′s and early 90′s, once acted in a family movie that was made for television. He told a source that several years later, he met up with a child actor that played his sibling on the movie and hooked up with him, only once. The D list actor is straight.

Harold Camping Disappears As Doomsday Arrives

I feel like this doomsday is just not as good as the one Harold Camping had back in May. It is kind of like in Big Daddy when Adam Sandler ruined the good surprise. When May 21 came and went without everyone dying, the man who made the prediction, Harold Camping, said he had miscalculated and the date was actually May 21. The problem with Harold and all his calculations is that he beat the odds on his life. He made the first prediction when he was younger and probably thought he would be long dead before May 21, 2011, came around. He probably figured he would not make it to 90 so it was a safe bet with no repercussions. Note to future evangelists, make sure the end of the world is going to happen after you would be 110. Just to be safe.

Ever since his prediction turned out to be wrong, his radio network of 60 stations has crumbled and he is down to just 25 people a week at his church services. Apparently people want their doomsday predictions to be accurate.

This time around Harold has dropped out of sight, but his church has already reserved space this Sunday in the place they worship. Guess that means we are safe.

Jessica Simpson Wants Bucks For Baby Announcement

Nothing comes free anymore. According to The NY Post, Jessica Simpson is not going to publicly say a word about being pregnant until she gets at least $500K from a tabloid. Baby photos to be negotiated separately. Until she gets that amount, the clothes will remain large and whether she is or is not will remain ambiguous. I am probably wrong, but I am still not even convinced she is pregnant. Of course as I say that some tabloid will probably say she is. And no, I do not count OK! Magazine's cover as confirmation. They would say Brad Pitt is pregnant if they thought it would sell magazines. Is she really hurting for money that much where she has to sell a pregnancy announcement because if celebrities start getting $500K just for saying they are pregnant, I think we can safely say that Lindsay would seriously think about jumping on that bandwagon.

Dina Sells Out Lindsay

That Lindsay Lohan sure is something. When the judge in your case says you really need to go to the morgue and put in some community service time prior to your next hearing, it seems like a no brainer that you would go. Well, no one ever said Lindsay's brain is normal. All those years of drugs and booze and prescription medicine may have just permanently damaged all those circuits. Lindsay had to be at the morgue at 8am. She was 40 minutes late. They did not let her in and told her she would have to come back today, at 7am. That is about an hour from now. I don't know if she can do it. That is really early. She probably will say to herself, "I will just get a fresh start next week."

Meanwhile, Dina Lohan, obviously realizing she is not going to make much off Lindsay in the near future and with Ali getting work but not making enough to cover Dina's monthly hair coloring bill, Dina is shopping a book around town which spills all the dirt about Lindsay would ever want to know. I would expect this out of Michael, but I thought Dina would at least wait until Lindsay was dead before exploiting her shamelessly.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Random Photos Part Four

Mary-Louise Parker gets the top spot. I feel like she is still not appreciated for how good of an actress she is.
Agyness Deyn shows off the hat she stole either from some Amish farmer or Jakob Dylan.
Because walking and holding an umbrella is just too hard for one person to accomplish.
I love Busy Phillips, but this is awful.
D.B. Sweeney tries to have his own little Corey Feldman hair strand.
Emmy Rossum and Selma Blair.
Umm, how come no one told me there is a chocolate fashion show in Paris? There better not be a bacon one someone is hiding from me.


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