Friday, April 04, 2008

Four For Fridays

#1 - This fairly recently married B list film and television actress also known for something else, and it isn't singing doesn't want her most recent marriage to end. Knowing she will get a lot of crap for divorcing so soon, she is going to stick it out by just not seeing her husband. Right now they try and do everything apart. The husband is up for it because he loves being known for having married our actress in the first place, and he is hoping that it works out. If I were him, I wouldn't hold my breath. (No, it isn't Katherine Heigl)

#2 - This singer of a very popular hard rock band is having his own marriage problems, but it is nothing his wife has done. It is more of what he has done, and so now in an effort to save his marriage to this famous offspring he is going to anger management classes and rehab.

#3 - This television celebrity chef professes lots of love for his wife. The problem he is that he is also professing it to his girlfriend of six months.

#4 - This television host refused to say anything to anyone when she went to a recent event. She posed for photos and made it look like she was enjoying herself and mingling, but in reality, she ignored everyone who spoke to her. At one point even turning her face to avoid talking to someone. Total time at even was about 15 minutes. Total amount of people she ticked off was about the same.

Best Of PR

This week, I got 142 e-mails from public relations people trying to get me to post their stuff. On Friday's I am going to pick the very best thing sent to me and post it here. This week it is the UK singer Duffy. This was a no brainer because I already like her and the song "Mercy". If you are going to Coachella this year she will be performing on the third day. Get there early though if you want to see her because I think she goes on like 10th.

Random Photos Part One

An airbrushed Cameron Diaz gets the top spot. It is a welcome to Los Angeles issue, and I think airbrushing a celebrity fits really well into that theme.
I have to say that Bruce Willis and his girlfriend look good together.
It is amazing what they can do with wax these days.
David Tennant and Catherine Tate.
At this point I wonder what judge is not going to vote for Chloe Marshall.
Well if you have any spare change in your cars, I know who would like to earn it. I really don't think it is possible for a woman in a beehive to look like Keith Richards, but Amy Winehouse is really trying.
Chris Evans on the other hand looks great.
David Spade and Kid Rock are hosting the new Fox reality show, "Who would you rather do?"
I just can't look at Kristin Davis the same anymore now that I know she is kind of a biter.
The amazing Johnny Knoxville.
I think this is the start of 30 days of JC Chasez being seen with a different woman each night. It would help if he was not being so obvious in his attempt to actually be touching her.
That is a big piece of fur Eva Herzigova is wearing.
Lupe Fiasco - London
Linda Evangelista looks amazing.
Kanye West - New York
I guess I don't pay attention to Kelly Ripa because I have never noticed the tattoo. Was it in that Shape Magazine bikini cover?
Keanu Reeves always looks better when he shaves.
It must be take your family to work week here in LA as Rick Schroder shows off another son and
Keanu Reeves brings along sister Kim.
Yes, I know you all love Mena Suvari's ass, but the reason I am showing this photo is because it is new and explains better the arm around the girl. It looks like the three of them are getting a photo taken and so I am going to say that this is not Mena's girlfriend.
Minnie Driver looks great.
I guess we all know what Mariah Carey's favorite position is.
Well I think f**king Dominic Monaghan would be a step down from Matt Damon, but that is just me.
RIP Wayne "Frosty Freeze" Frost. In my opinion he was the best break dancer that ever lived. He died yesterday at the age of 44.
Taryn Manning is a mess. New hair color, but still a mess.
The Kooks - London
I'm not going to go. Are you going?

Lainey Blind Item

She isn’t eating. She hasn’t been eating for weeks, hellbent on losing what she calls some extra padding but what everyone else calls … nothing. There is nothing to lose. But still she needs to lose it.

Started dieting furiously a couple of months ago but wasn’t seeing results quickly enough so she’s cut back the food and as a result has turned into a total hag, chewing people out during production meetings, yelling at catering staff for daring to bring food near her, and getting into a little shoving match with her own publicist, who has the unfortunate position of having to attend to her as she ramps up promotion, over scheduling.

On the plus side, she is indeed growing ever slimmer. But the thinness is now accompanied by a telltale glassy look in her eyes which isn’t entirely unfamiliar. Being skinny can make you dependent and cranky and weak…

Which is why she hasn’t been able to finish a day’s work all week, always begging off early, complaining of the flu, or a migraine...and now the project is behind schedule, her agent has been called, and a talking-to is in the works. Career not in jeopardy… yet. But probably soon if she doesn’t start eating.

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which celeb is so hooked on the old Colombian marching powder that he had to pop out to powder his nose no fewer than five times during a twohour film?

**Note** They did not separate twohour so I just left it together in case it is some kind of clue.

How To Waste An Entire Week Of Work

Most of the time I find ways for you to blow off 30 minutes or so of work. Today however, I have found a way for you to waste away an entire 40 hour work week and be entertained and informed at the same time. All of that sounds like an infomercial doesn't it? So Mike Wallace of 60 Minutes fame used to have an interview program back on ABC in 1957 and 1958. He gave those interviews to the University of Texas and they are all online. I tried to embed them, but I am lazy and there are lots, so you will just have to click over to their site. If you click the link for Gloria Swanson's video it should pop up, but if not, you can click here to see the entire list of interviews. You have to watch the Anthony Perkins one. Oh, and if you can't understand what they are saying, if you click on the T button on the video box, up pops a transcript.

Gloria Swanson


Gloria Swanson, one of Hollywood's most spectacular stars, talks to Wallace about why she is not making films, sex appeal, Hollywood in the 1920s, marriage, plastic surgery, and cancer cures.

Watch Video Read Transcript

Nicolas Cage Whines And Whines

Kathleen Turner had to say sorry to Nicolas Cage for alleging in her book that Nicolas was arrested twice for drunk driving and for also stealing a chihuahua. Apparently Nicolas Cage didn't want all four of his fans to think he was some kind of menace on the roads or enjoyed the company of dogs.

Fortunately for us, all of this apologizing stuff is limited to the UK. The rest of us can just laugh and laugh at Nicolas because he wouldn't have any kind of chance of winning over here in the US.
You know if he had just let this alone it would have been done. The whole purpose behind all of this was he really does think he has a bunch of 10 year old fans because of the National Treasure films. Maybe he does. How many ten year old kids are begging their parents to read them excerpts from Kathleen Turner's book? Does he think Nickelodeon is going to break into programming to say that Nic Cage is alleged to have stolen a dog 20 years ago? Hell no. Are kids taking the time each morning to read The Daily Mail? What do you want to bet that maybe he made a move on Kathleen all those years ago and she turned him down. She was decent looking back then, and now he just wants to get back at her.

I think the chances are much higher that a 10 year old kid is going to be horrified by his acting in Peggy Sue Got Married than in anything he may have done off the set. I notice he doesn't seem to care that a kid might turn the channel and see him killing himself with booze and hookers. That is a great example to set for the kids. One paragraph about dog napping and drunk driving in a 300 page book is kind of going to get lost in the shuffle when a kid is watching Honeymoon In Vegas and asks his mom why the man from National Treasure is selling the woman from SATC to another man for money.

Pimpa Turned Jessica Into A Bit Of A Freak

Lost in all the shuffle yesterday of Perez Hilton outing John Mayer was the little throwaway line that said while the two made out, Jessica Simpson spent the entire time rubbing John Mayer's crotch. I always thought Ashlee was the freaky sister. I mean being with Pete Wentz you have to know that at some point, freaky s**t is going to happen. Whether it be animals or little people or unique uses for velcro, things are going to happen.

But apparently Pimpa must have taught both his little girls that it is ok to be freaky. I think we are all in agreement that Jessica was never freaky with Nick which is why he found the freakiest person he could. Anyone who saw Newlyweds and realized that Nick had to beg for a month and spend a couple of thousand to get anything other than missionary once a week from Jessica knows someone else brought the freak out of her.

So who was it? Dane Cook? He isn't funny but he looks like he could be a freak. Bam Margera? Another person who likes to play both sides of the ball so maybe. Maybe she was pulling trains on Dukes Of Hazzard, or Pimpa had a talk with her. Who knows. I do know one thing though. Tony Romo must have told everyone in the locker room. Remember how all the players thought she was a jinx, and then Tony had a talk with them and they all changed their stories immediately. Yep, obviously they all think they have a chance now.

I could just be seeing too much into this. She could have just been drunk as crap and didn't know her boyfriend was making out with Perez and just was doing what Daddy told her to do.

Hulk Hogan Gay?

Oh, wait a second. I guess that is a woman. I think. Are those breasts? No, not the ones on Hogan. The other person. She/it reminds me of that woman that Howard Stern used to always have on his show who said she was a woman but no one believed her. She finally took a test, and turns out she was a woman. Kneepads Magazine has obviously taken sides in the divorce proceedings and realized that Hulk's wife doesn't really have much of a future. Kneepads says that Hulk Hogan is in a much better place now that he is with Jennifer. Oh, huh. Well she has a woman's name, so we will go with woman for now. I mean Brooke is a woman or so people tell me, so I guess this person could be as well.

Kneepads Magazine said this photo is Hogan frolicking with Jennifer. Hey People how about that cover story with John Graziano. When is that coming out? I don't think he is going to be doing much frolicking in the near future. Where is the mention of the lawsuit against the Hogans and the pending criminal charges? None of that huh? Nope, just a lot of crap like the following sentence, "Best known for laying the smack-down, Hulk Hogan showed his softer side this week in Miami Beach – splashing around with new girlfriend Jennifer McDaniel."

Excuse me while I go throw up.

Ashton Makes It A Little Obvious

Let me see if I get this straight. No paps ever follow Lisa Rinna. She has to go to them. Yet somehow, Lisa Rinna ends up on a balcony in a bathrobe drinking wine with an 18 year old kid who has a sock in his pants and the pap just happen to be right outside the correct balcony at the correct time to take photos. There are about ten photos in the set and this is as close as they actually come to kissing in any of them. Lisa is laughing so hard that a kiss would probably be impossible anyway.

The only way that kid would be with Lisa is if she were chaperoning his high school prom or paying him lots and lots of bucks. For a woman who really has no remaining natural parts she is not bad looking, but to think that guy would be interested in her without some form of compensation is just not believable.

Ashton needs to start becoming more creative or this idea of his is going to go nowhere. Now, if he came out and said his marriage to Demi was part of a five year prank, and that he is really her adopted son, then that would be cool, and would explain a great deal about why Bruce hangs out with Demi so much. What they should have done is left a bathroom door open at a restaurant, and had Lisa's husband bent over the sink looking like he is doing lines of coke. Now, that would get some attention and some press.

All of the above comments go for the Marla Maples, Bachelor dude photos as well.

Ted C Blind Item

Fey Oiled-Tush is a very rich man. He’s also a very desperate man, as so many celebrated Hollywood players ultimately are. After all, doesn’t success just beget the desire for more success—rather than satisfaction? Always. Just ask Michael Eisner, Mike Ovitz, Meg Ryan and assorted other colossal check cashers who once thought the green would never stop coming, only to see the influx dwindle considerably. But this Vice ain’t about power, it’s about fag-hag ass kissing, sorry.

Margarita Screwed-'Em-All is a reigning queen of Tinseltown. And even though she doesn’t go out much, she sure as hell did at one time—always with one of her myriad lovers/husbands/pets. (Paris was so not the first to make a pooch a photo-op accoutrement, Margarita beat her on that score ages ago.) Instead, M-babe stays home at her art-filled mansion (which is a little on the tacky side, I must say, unless you prefer brass deer next to your masterpieces and that sort of overpriced mishmash style). However, she loves to receive. Particularly the gays.

True, she’s doing it less nowadays, but still, a flaming fagola—along with fewer and fewer members of Screwed-Em’-All’s own fam—still makes it up past M.S.’s fancy gates. And Fey, utterly distraught by the current downturn of his previously magical movie touch and sorely needing a pick-me-up, was dying to be one of them recently. Don’t think FOT mentioned anything about bringing the wife-unit when he—and not one of his minions—rang up Margarita’s secretary to request an audience. “Get him to buy me those jewels I liked,” Ms. S barked, via her assistant, back to Fey, message being no rocks, no tush pecking.

So Mr. Oiled-Tush, armed with the location of the baubles that tickled Margarita so, actually went and picked out a piece from the overpriced jeweler. Had it delivered pronto to Margarita, who, after tearing open the box which contained a sweet little piece, screamed: “One! He only got me one?”

Indeed, Fey had made the lethal error of purchasing not an assortment of expensive sparklers for Margarita to choose from—but only one already-selected lonely little lovely. Not good. Result being, there was no audience.

And the gift was not returned, bitch you very much. Poor Fey. What will he do for his mood-altering now, I wonder? Start up with the boys again?

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Today's Blind Items

#1 - Apparently someone is living out whatever fantasies they can think of. This Academy Award winning/nominated A list film actor and his girlfriend decided to go car shopping. They picked out a modest $150,000 car to take for a little test drive. When they got back an hour later, they said thanks, but no thanks to the salesperson and drove off. Inside the car was the smell of sex and a used condom. Apparently someone decided not to clean up after themselves. The owner of the dealership placed a call to our actor to say that he did not find it humorous and was not sure if the car would be able to sell now because of the smell and was going to contact his attorneys. Our actor then decided that perhaps he ought to just go ahead and buy the car.

#2 - This rock star's divorce has been so acrimonious (nice word huh?) and he hates his C list ex so much that he loves calling her up and talking to her or leaving messages while he has having sex with whatever woman he happens to be with him at that time.

Random Photos Part One

When Agyness Deyn wears this outfit, it looks cool. When Juliette Lewis wears it, not so much.
You know what I love about Heather Matarazzo? The fact that she is proud of who she is and doesn't care what people think. Wish more actors would be the same way.
Eddie Vedder - Vancouver
David Foote scares me. He is a talented artist, but he scares me.
Mr. Ben, "I use Grecian Formula" Stiller and his lovely wife Christine Taylor.
The lovely Ali Landry at a hot moms event.
Louis C.K. is hilarious.
I would be getting drunk off my ass also if I was getting married to Beyonce on Friday. In fact, it would be the beginning of a lifetime bender of biblical proportions.
That whole Full House thing was kind of a premonition huh? That is one Full House Jodie Sweetin has going on.
I love Jena Malone. Love her, love her, love her, but she really needs to hook up with David Foote and they can make their very own Addams Family.
Julianna Marguiles certainly seems happy with Keith Lieberthal.
Mena Suvari and her boyfriend.
Mena Suvari and her girlfriend?
Is there a flood coming? Matthew Broderick must be expecting one because those pants are about a 1/2 inch from being embarrassing.
Lindsay Lohan visited the set of N.E.R.D.'s new video. Want to know the name of the song. Everybody Nose. Kind of appropriate huh?
Lifehouse - New York
Wow. Norah Jones looks amazing.
This cartoon seems appropriate in light of Naomi Campbell being arrested for spitting on a London policeman today. Hey, at least it wasn't a cell phone.
I admit it. I watched Perfect Strangers.

The lovely Melora Hardin and her equally lovable daughter.
Zoe Kravitz and Ben Foster are still going strong. That new haircut though just screams "I loved my mom on Cosby."
The Sutters. Dad doesn't seem to be working out as much.
Tell me again why Taylor Dayne isn't the female judge on American Idol.
Wow. When you become royalty they must just teach you from day one how to look as stiff and uninterested and emotionless as possible.
Norman Reedus looks like he could use some sleep.


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