Friday, November 13, 2009

Today's MV Clue

No Four For Friday today because it would just end up getting caught up in all of this. The final clue for this anniversary week is MV was born in the United States.

Random Photos Part One

You throw Derek Jeter in a funny wig filming a movie with Mark Wahlberg a week after winning the World Series and you get the top spot.
Amanda Peet gets the silver though. Now I'm thinking about tequila. Tequila and Amanda Peet equals drunk dialing.
I'm guessing by the look on Des Moines Jungle Book's face that he realized Ashlee Simpson is his mom or he saw Joe Simpson flashing someone. Or gas. Or he could have seen his future if he hangs out with Paris Hilton like
Brandon Davis
Bridget Marquardt is looking lovely.
Ditto Devon Aoki.
Eva Longoria pulls out an old bridesmaid dress.
While Emme looks stunning as usual.
Eva doesn't seem to like the picture. Funny enough I kind of like it.
George Lopez looking at Zac Efron playing with his ball.
Also at the game were Jack Wagner and Heather Locklear.
The cast of Glee shows what they think of Tyra.
I think this is the first time in a long time I have seen Julianne Moore with her son.
Joan Osborne - New York City
I guess I will read the book. Everyone is talking about it.
Also at the book launch were Stephanie March, Sandra Bernhard, Sara Switzer and Bobby Flay.
Liev was there
As was Elizabeth Berkeley
Not there, and not sure where he is himself is Kenny Chesney.
That is one way to bring more of the Twilight cast with you.
"I bought this. Can you believe I actually paid for something?"
Madonna looking at orphans in Brazil.
A million dollar car takes a swim. The guy was talking on his cell phone. All I can think of is a million dollars gone, and of course the Office episode where Michael drives into a lake.
Marcia Gay Harden has some pretty good form.

Goodness she is excited.
Mr. Hudson - Manchester
Muse - London
Russell Brand's new DVD must come with a naked picture of him.
A first time appearance for Scott Adsit.
Simon Rex in the same shirt he has been wearing for a week.
Hey look it's Ja Rule being fondled by Tila Tequila who has said she is now exclusively a lesbian. Until her next offer comes along.
One of my favorites. Tamara Tunie.

Your Turn

These are two very simple questions, but since I have been discussing this endlessly with people in the office I want to know what you think.

Will you be getting a flu shot?
Will you be getting a H1N1 shot?

Ted C Blind Item

Poor Judas Jack-Off. He now has it as bad as permanently closeted movie star Toothy Tile. Only, I fear Judas is not even pretending to be happy, quite unlike Toothy.

Remember, our very handsome and very unkind Judas is still trying to get the ditched BF to have sex, all the while out prancing to the gullible world with his gorgeous girlfriend—whenever there's an available photo op, that is.

But whereas Toothy actually likes hanging with the beard at home and out with the kids, Judas doesn't, at least not as much.

Maybe that's the reason Judas has suggested to the GF, whom he glumly now lives with, that they should both take up...

...flying. As in, in a plane. As in 37,000 feet in the air. These two beauties are supposed to take their lives in their own hands, all 2012-like, and fly over Los Angeles like it's a damn movie set, or something?

Now, either this is a true effort on Judas' part to make their prearranged living arrangement genuinely more exciting (i.e., bearable), or Mr. J.J. is planning on using one of those parachutes that go up with these schooling planes and jumping off with his after the dimpled girlfriend's chute suddenly disappears, or better, yet, malfunctions?

It's all just too weird, too much. The sudden interest in having a hobby together (and a life-threatening one, at that), after getting shacked up in a living sitch Judas has never wanted to be in the first place. What's up, Judey?

But then, some guys are just p--sies when their managers and their agents tell them to stay put and figure out how to make it look real. Know what I mean, Toothy?

Don't go up in that plane with Judas whatever you do, girlfriend!

And It Ain't: Jake Gyllenhaal, Lance Armstrong, Matthew McConaughey

Emmy Rossum Thinks Far Too Highly Of Herself

In an interview with the DJ Valentine, Emmy Rossum spoke about her secret marriage to producer Justin Siegel. She said that she kept the marriage a secret because, "It's hard to have a private life and keep it private and hope that people don't pick you apart and that's kind of what's difficult about this job." Umm, I don't think anyone really knew you existed until they found out about the secret marriage and that you were now dating Side Show Bob aka Adam Duritz.

Did she think we would spend hours picking over her marriage? That she would suddenly put her in the Jennifer Aniston stratosphere and wonder if she was pregnant or how the marriage was progressing? Does she really think she is that famous?

She says all she wants now is her freedom and to be happy. I noticed that when she found a famous guy to date that she didn't try and keep that a secret.

Happy Birthday Chris Noth & Gerard Butler

Thanks to Rose for reminding me about Gerard's birthday and the photos.

Quentin Tarantino Does Kung Fu For Japanese Commercial

Wow, the headline is almost as long as the actual video. Quentin Tarantino managed to get paid for doing a Japanese commercial. In the commercial he is going to do Kung Fu. Uh huh. Well, anyway here is some footage of his rehearsal.

Nick Hogan Haunted By Prison - I'm Haunted By His Sister

Nick Hogan must have needed some walking around money this week because he opened his big mouth and decided to go ahead and give John Graziano a good swift kick in the ass.

Nick spoke wot Life & Style about his time behind bars. Yes, that is how he refers to it. Like he is some kind of f**king lifer who gets thrown back inside every year or so. The little bastard spent six months in jail and spent most of it on the phone with his dad trying to get a reality show deal so when I see things like this quote it really, really pisses me off.

"There are moments that haunt me to this day. There are times when I'll be watching a prison movie and hear the sound of a gate slamming, and I get the willies. It was horrible."

It was six months in minimum security. It's over. John Graziano is home now, but is a vegetable for the rest of his life. I bet he would love to have had his nightmare be over in six months but it is going to go on forever. I know Nick served his time and I am willing to stop talking about but not when he makes idiotic statements like this in an attempt to make us feel sorry for him. Where in the f**k was the question from Life & Style about when he saw John last or talked to his family? Huh?

"Time away from my family was the most difficult part of my sentence. One of the things which makes you feel comforted is talking to a family member. But you don't have a phone - you have to wait until it's your time of the day to call. You miss being able to connect with people because everyone there is just cold, just brutal."

Uh huh. Do you think John can talk to his own family? And think of the f**king sacrifice Nick made. He didn't have his own phone and had to wait in line. F**k. I need a drink.

I'm A Little Confused

I read about the whole Cindy Crawford extortion thing last night and maybe I was already too drunk, but I am trying to understand this whole thing. Should we do this together? Maybe it will help if I talk it out.

1. Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber have a child.
2. Cindy Crawford & Rande Gerber hired a nanny for the child.
3. The child, who was 7 at the time gets photographed by the nanny bound to a chair and gagged.
4. Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber have no idea such a photograph exists.
5. Cindy Crawford & Rande Gerber forget they have a child.
6. When finally her parents thought to ask about her day several months after the fact, the child says they were playing cops and robbers.
7. The nanny is lonely at work and has a model come over and spend some adult time with her
8. The model at some point sees the photo and takes it.
9. He also takes a copy of a note the nanny wrote which is a "joke" kidnap note.
10. The nanny is fired for something unrelated.
11. The model meets with Rande Gerber and is paid $1000 for the photo and copy of the note.
12. At some point the model gets arrested and deported back to Germany.
13. From Germany he attempts to extort more money from Gerber and Crawford who notify the cops.

OK, so here are my questions. The guy was arrested for what? Extortion? I know he was deported on an immigration violation. Is Rande Gerber such an idiot that he thinks a photo made from a digital camera is the only one? And a copied note? Really? How is any of this extortion? Is the model going to sell the photos and say that Crawford and Gerber like to play bondage games with their kid? Really? There is waaaaaaaaay more to this than we are hearing right now.

Harry Potter Says He Wasn't Smoking Pot

The Mirror published pictures today (see above) of what they say is Daniel Radcliffe enjoying a spliff. You know his name is just made for smoking pot. You have the whole Potter and pot. Then you have the fact that spliff rhymes with Radcliffe. You just don't find that kind of literary, lyrical symmetry very often. Oh sure, maybe in a Katie Price book or the biography of Paris Hilton, but really it is rare.

Anyway, most of the time celebrities don't care if you picture them smoking a joint. An exception would be well, I guess if you saw some 15 or 16 year old A list tweener who should know better considering how often she is photographed, but anyway, I digress.

Anyway, Daniel is pissed and says he is going to sue. His rep told the BBC, "Daniel does smoke the occasional roll-up cigarette, but he was not doing anything more than this. We categorically deny the claims regarding Daniel Radcliffe published in today's Daily Mirror. We are considering our position and will be taking all necessary action in relation to such allegations."

That is a strongly worded letter. Well, a phone call, or maybe an e-mail. Anyway, you get the point. I think this one is going to cost The Daily Mirror about 100K in damages and legal fees. But, if they sold more than that in papers then it is a win.

OctoMom In The New York Times

I never thought I would see Nadya Suleman in the pages of The New York Times. I guess somewhere in my head I thought the only time I would see her in there would be looking at the tv guide listings. Well, not only is Nadya Suleman in the pages of New York Times Magazine, I think she is also their cover and there is a huge article about her and they sent a reporter to her house and it just goes on and on.

You have to read this article. It is really long but the reporter was there while the television crew was there and so you get this slice of reality television.

"McLeod and Campbell began with Jonah, the octuplet with the cleft lip. The moment he was placed on the inclined board, he began to squirm and slide downward. Then he started to cry. McLeod began shooting. But a kid turning away from the camera, crying and sliding out of frame? Not so hot. The grown-ups looked pained. A strip of Velcro was attached to the board, and Jonah remounted. It helped. For a few seconds. It was hard to know whether the shot would be good enough, but the show had to go on.

Nariyah came next, a willing and even performer, looking up and smiling as if on cue. She was followed by pure pain. Jeremiah, swaddled in blue, was something of a wiggler. Evidently, he was having a hard time connecting with what a Method actor would call his motivation. He began to cry. Violently. Isaiah, the next, was equally dispiriting, and on it went. One by one, each baby was placed on the slippery, uncomfortable board, secured — or not so much — with the Velcro swatch and filmed. One by one, the babies cried.

The exertions of the grown-ups became more and more strained. As each crying baby failed to love the camera, Campbell, McLeod and Suleman gathered around the lens, each time imploring the baby to look up, even if just for two seconds."

Nady Suleman says she hates doing it but it is the only way to make enough money to take care of her kids. The reporter seems to sympathize with her decision, but also seems determined to bring us every last gritty detail involved in filming 8 kids. The other six kids are generally ignored.

Julianne Hough Is Cold Hearted

I don't like Julianne Hough and I probably never will. There I said it. I think I previously revealed her as a blind and she is just only looking out for herself and doesn't care who gets in the way. She has dated almost every one of her partners on DWTS. She canceled a wedding because she was cheating. The list goes on and on. She does it to stay in the spotlight which is why she grabbed on to Chuck Wicks. Julianne had a country album coming out, was new to the genre so why not grab a guy already established in country music.

I say all this because she was asked the other day by US Weekly about her breakup with Chuck and this is what she had to say.

"It's a good thing for us right now. We are both extremely busy and working on our careers and really focused on that." Chuck didn't feel the same way and everyone said he looked like a zombie at the CMA Awards.

Her brother Derek who is also not one of my favorite people said his sister was far too busy for a relationship. This is the part that killed me though. You go out with a guy for what a year? She was asked if there was any heartache.

"Not at all."

None? You don't even miss the guy? She is cold hearted. She then went on to say that they are really good friends and that she hopes she sees him at the show although she was there with another guy already. Can you tell how much I dislike her? People break up with people all the time. It happens and it is a part of life. In my opinion though she has used every guy she has ever dated and only goes out with someone if she thinks that it can further her career.

Jon Gosselin Is Too Famous To Work

As you may or may not know, or may or may not care, Jon Gosselin are involved in a legal tussle. Basically TLC is pissed that Jon ruined their show with his actions and that he has been doing media other than that arranged by TLC. Well, Jon filed a suit against them and so now everyone is filing things left and right and Jon filed a doozy.

He says that by TLC enforcing the contract that he signed and agreed to and was paid for that he is being kept from getting a job. Oh, and not just any job. See, Jon can only work in an entertainment job.

"Now, I find myself unemployed and without the ability to secure non-entertainment related engagements because the enormous Media interest, cameras, reporters and public interest makes it impossible to carry on normal daily activities, let alone find, secure and maintain a job with an employer who is willing to be exposed to the daily Media intrusions that has impeded by life."

First of all I doubt the f**ker ever tried to look for a job and if he is going to play this game he is going to lose. The press would be crazy for a bout a week but if the moron actually just worked his job the craziness would die down because there is no story. He can have a normal life beginning today if he wanted. He might as well get used to it because no one wants him for anything as it is right now and six months from now it will be even worse.

Too famous to work? Seriously. Get a life a-hole.


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