Friday, February 06, 2009

Four For Friday - Bad Drug Behavior

Every so often I like to have a theme on the Four For Friday and one of my favorites is always drug use. Sure, there are the times where nothing beats a great bestiality story like the time that, no, you don't want to hear about that do you? I didn't think so. I will tell you about that another day. What? OK, well it does have drug use in it so that's ok. We are going to have to go back a little in the way back machine.

Not too far. You certainly know both of the actors involved in this. The two actors at this point were both C list. They had already descended from their highest levels (B+ with A list name recognition) and were now staring at their own mediocrity and failed careers. On this movie though they were stars and filming outside the US and in the middle of nowhere. Well, with nothing to do at night, the two were doing non-stop drugs day and night. Well, one night they woke up the animal wrangler for the movie and paid him a significant amount of money to bring them a sheep. I don't need to go into details, but it is fair to say they both took a turn.

#3 - There was a party at this celebutard's house about six months ago. At the time he was kind of on a tryout with his wealthy parents who had decided to give him another chance. All of you know this celebutard. You don't want to know him and would never want to meet him, but you know who he is. Anyway, jacked up on enough coke and speed to kill a rhino our celebutard decided to do his own feats of strength. How so? He took a sledgehammer and totaled the brand new car of one of his guests. The guest was not amused and absolutely beat the living crap out of the celebutard.

#4 - This Academy Award Winning actor was filming a movie about two years ago. He gave a great performance but it was not the performance the director had in mind. What was supposed to be an uptight character turned into a sleeping, slow witted, type of character which caused the movie to go over budget and shoot for twice as long. The reason was our actor was shooing up heroin almost constantly and could barely even function and could only remember a line at the most for each shot.

Rachel Bilson Goes Off On The Paps

I think one of the things that paps are going to regret is the introduction of video into their world. The reason is that by now we have seen what kind of inane questions they ask, and the way they try and provoke celebrities into a reaction that will sell better.

In this instance, there was none of that but I am completely on the side of Rachel Bilson. She and her little sister were out shopping yesterday at Toys-R-Us and were being hounded by a group of paps who were calling out her name to get her to look up and kept racing from aisle to aisle to try and get a better shot and were basically just being annoying.

Earlier in the day Rachel had been really nice to them and let them take shots of her alone and even one or two of her sister. However, by the time they got to the store things had got way out of hand and none of the employees of the store had any experience in dealing with paps and no one was willing to kick them out and so it really got crazy.

As you can see here, Rachel finally had had enough and let them have it. They have definitely made an enemy of her and Toys-R-Us didn't do any favors for themselves either by not kicking out the paps when they had the chance.

Random Photos Part One

I just really love this photo, and Kate Winslet on top is definitely not a bad choice. Wow, I didn't even expand on the double entendre there.
A first time appearance for Alison Brie in the photos. Have I told you how much I like cheese? I wonder how many cheese jokes she has heard in her life.
Andie MacDowell looks really different than normal.
I almost didn't even recognize Boyz II Men without their matching clothes.
I don't know if it is the angle or what, but if it wasn't for the entire tube of lipstick on her lips, I am not sure I would have immediately recognized Christina Aguilera who is standing next to jewelry designer Stephen Webster.
Cut Off Your Hands - Perth
Apparently Jennifer Aniston has a mock up of the Friends set in her house. No, it is the original set, but still, that would be kind of creepy if she did.
Yeah, I really need to think about stalking Isla Fisher.
The looks like oral sex photo of the day.
Any guesses? How about Katarina Witt. Have not seen her in forever.
Apparently Lara Croft can also kill you with cell phones.
Melora Hardin turns on the lights at The Empire State Building and
out pop a couple of guys. I think the clapper would probably be more convenient than going to the Empire State Building, but whatever works for her. She looks damn good here.
Love Nikka Costa. Don't love what she is wearing. She should give it to Carrot Top after she is done with it.
N-Dubz - London
No, that isn't your 70 year old grandmother it is Renee Zellweger.
Slash - Los Angeles
Tame Impala - Perth

Your Turn

When I was watching Groundhog Day this week and watched Bill Murray try to kill himself in a variety of different ways, I was reminded of some scary moments of my own. There was the time I stumbled into a macrobiotic restaurant. When I realized what it was, my eyes glazed, my heart started beating faster and I kept hearing Gwyneth's voice in my head saying, "I hate chocolate." I never thought I would find the front door in time to escape.

Now, what I want from you today is the scariest thing you have ever done or the scariest thing you want to do. I will take either. If you have done something scary though, I want details. I don't want to just read, "I went sky diving." I want to know if you had to be pushed out of the plane or if you jumped on your own. Tell me scary.

Quick Hits Part Two

Free Food For Everyone - Val Kilmer is thinking of running for Governor of New Mexico in 2010. Apparently the message he thinks will get him elected is free fast food for everyone. In order to demonstrate his willingness to do what he promises, Val will make it a point to eat at every fast food place in the state at least twice a year.

No One Likes A Loser - In an interview with ABC News, Kate Winslet has said she doesn't want to be the Susan Lucci of the Oscars. Although she loves the fact she has been nominated for so many Academy Awards she would like to win one of them at least once. She doesn't want her headstone to read the most nominated loser in the the history of the Awards. Well, sure no one wants that, but think about how many people don't get nominated or make more than $10K a year acting or the starving children of the world or the fact that Nicolas Cage wears hairplugs and you can see there are more pressing issues than actually winning one of those statutes. That being said, I hope she wins also.

No Beads For Carlos Mencia - Apparently all those really bad jokes Carlos makes about Hurricane Katrina victims finally made their way to the city of New Orleans and as a result, Carlos was yanked as a celebrity rider in the Orpheus parade during Mardi Gras. Mencia had also been scheduled to perform after the parade, but is probably not going to do that either. An Orpheus spokesperson said that Carlos was not sensitive to the needs of the community and is not someone they want to have associated with the parade. Joan Rivers is his replacement. Nice. Just please don't let her flash for beads.

Gwen Stefani Gets Recalled

Well, at least it isn't news that Gwen Stefani was having 8 year old kids make all of her Harajuku clothes. That would be bad, and embarrassing. No, instead it is just a normal, wear it and it might kill you kind of recall. It seems as if the RSL Hoodie and Lovers Leopard hoodies sold for toddlers "have a drawstring through the hood which can pose a strangulation hazard to children."

Now, no one has died and as far as I know, no one has been injured as a result of the jackets, but I'm guessing that someone must have been or else why would there have been an investigation? Do you think someone saw it in the store and knew right away something was wrong with it? I would think no one would really notice unless it happened to their child and then they sent one in to the US Consumer Product Safety Commission.

If you bought one of the jackets you spent $75 but you can get a full refund where you bought it. Oh, and a free best of CD from Gwen. No, not really.

Brazilian Botox?

While Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes continue enjoying the sights and sounds of Brazil and mangling the language, they did also find time to visit the private island of Brazil's best plastic surgeon. According to the NY Post, Tom and Katie and Suri went and visited Dr. Ivo Pitanguy who is known not only for his abilities as a plastic surgeon but also has his own Island of Dr. Moreau thing going with a bunch of exotic animals. Hey, when you are Tom Cruise you don't take your kid to the zoo you fly to her an island with exotic animals and let her loose. While she runs around screaming and crying, the family looks on as if to say, "hey, we really are giving her some new experiences." Of course the cynics of this world might think that Tom paid a visit to the doctor for some plastic surgery for himself, or maybe Katie? I mean I doubt he would go the whole Sharon Stone route and think that Suri needed botox injections in her feet.

It could also be that Tom was trying to help the world economy. I read that the company that manufactures Botox is laying off 500 people because in a recession, people just are not injecting themselves with botulism as much as they do in a thriving economy. The final possibility is that the doctor had been skipping out on his Scientology bill and Tom was there to collect.

Katrina Darrell Doesn't Want To Stunt Her Career

I don't think I have laughed this hard since I don't know when. I have not watched American Idol this year but I do know all about Katrina Darrell and her bikini audition and the videos of her that have surfaced of her doing pole dances at car conventions. I even know she was kicked off the show and of course she is now trying to exploit her 15 minutes of fame. Instead of being realistic about her 15 minutes though, she has decided that somehow she is going to have a huge career in the entertainment business that does not involve her photo being plastered on the cards people hand you on the streets of Las Vegas.

Because of ratings, Access Hollywood of course had her on their show. Priceless. Seriously, it does not get any more delusional than this.

When asked what kind of offers she had been receiving, this is what she said, “[I’ve had] a lot of different offers like Vegas promotion offers. Of course Playboy has called. I wouldn’t say no, but at the same time I don’t want to stunt my career by jumping into that too soon and be labeled once again, as ‘just a body.’ But I don’t knock it."

Oh, Katrina. What kind of career do you think you are going to have? What is there to stunt? All of those Vegas calls. Those are going to be your bread and butter for the next year or so. At that point people will forget about you and you will discover you really didn't have a career at all. Oh, sure you will have posters and be forever known as the bikini girl from American Idol. No one will know your name though and pretty soon you will be autographing photos of you in a bikini for $10 at the local grocery store opening while telling everyone you are working on an album that is going to come out as soon as you can work some things out with a record label and your manager and agent and a million other excuses.

Take the Playboy and run, run, run to the bank and deposit the money they give you. Don't think there will be lots more after that because there won't be.

Quick Hits

Apparently Kellogg's Has Never Heard Of The Munchies - Michael Phelps has lost his first sponsor because of the photo released earlier this week showing him enjoying a bong. Apparently Kellogg's has chosen not to take advantage of this opportunity by selling itself as a snack for people stoned out of their minds and craving cereal, and instead will focus on the elementary school crowd instead with wholesome, nutritious cereals that are good for you like Kellogg's Honey Smacks which is about 50% sugar and one serving has more sugar than a glazed donut. They are missing out here. I'm telling you.

The CW Wants Some Vampires - Everyone wants vampires and to try and find a way to make some money off of them. The latest to try will be the CW which has picked up the pilot for a television show called Vampire Diaries. I was hoping it was like Red Shoe Diaries but it seems to be instead based on a series of books about two vampire brothers who are fighting over the soul of a girl in the town where they live. Oh, and they want the souls of everyone else in town as well. Not a lot of sleeping at night in that town I'm thinking.

Yoko? - It is unanimous. All the members of The Kills except for Jamie Hince have said they don't want Kate Moss on tour with them and sure as hell don't want her on the stage singing any vocals. Apparently Jamie Hince has told Kate she could go on tour with the band and sing and of course Kate wants that because hey, she is a major talent and her kid can look after herself at home. I mean she must be all of 8 by now. Apparently the rest of the band said they didn't want to even see Kate for the next six months while on tour. She really knows how to win people over doesn't she.

NY Daily News Blind Item

Which young magazine editor dispenses bags of blow to Hollywood starlets so they can be “extra up” for the photo shoots he arranges?

The Engagement Is Not The Issue

Yesterday afternoon Star reported that Fast And The Furious and not much else actor Paul Walker was engaged to his teenage girlfriend Jasmine Pilchard-Gosnell. Well, US Weekly immediately got on the offensive which basically meant they fielded a call from Paul's people who said the couple was not engaged and US Magazine was indignant that Star was wrong and US was right.

Hey, kids, stop arguing. What the hell does it matter if 35 year old Paul Walker is engaged to his 19 year old girlfriend or are still dating? Who cares. The story is the fact that they have been dating 3 years. Yes, the pair got together when Paul was 32, she was 16 and Paul's daughter was 6. Creepy isn't it? I wonder if that is how they met? I wonder if Paul is looking for someone else now that she has reached the age of consent or if he is ok with her until she starts drinking. I'm not sure exactly what a 32 year old sometime movie star sees in a 16 year old girl, but, perhaps he thinks she will be a great step mom to his daughter or they can have sleepovers and invite their friends over and do each other's hair and talk about boys. Or middle aged men.

Do you think Paul lived in fear everyday that her parents would turn him in? If you were her parent would you let your 16 year old daughter go out with a 32 year old man who had a 6 year old daughter at the time? It's creepy isn't it? Now, I do remember Paul being Mormon so maybe it is an arranged thing or something like that. Wait until they start doing the promotional stuff for the new Fast & Furious movie. Wow, he is going to get some uncomfortable questions. Between his teenage girlfriend and the legal troubles of Michelle Rodriguez, it is going to be a lot of work for the publicists.

Brangelina Baby Bonzana - Adoption Time?

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are in Thailand this week touring refugee camps. It makes a nice change from the flashy premieres and glitz and glamor, and of course all the kids. Angelina was doing her UN thing which, unlike other former celebrities in her position, she actually seems to care about and work hard at bringing attention to the plight of refugees.

It isn't unusual of course for Angelina to go on these things. What is really unusual is for Brad to tag along as well. Now, maybe he just tagged along because he wanted to see the plight of Rohinyga boat people that he had been reading so much about in, well, lets face it, he probably had not heard of them until Angelina spelled out the word for him and showed him on a map where Thailand is.

So, they could be there for what one government minister described as private time but which I like to call the two minute drill. Yeah, that is why I don't get to practice my two minute drill very often. I'm just wondering if it is time for another child. It would be the perfect time and have escape so far the glaring eye of the paps while they make this move. What do you think? Will they come home with another kid? Do we even care? Even with as much money as Brangelina has, is there a cutoff point to where they should stop adding to their family? Can you imagine if Brad and Angelina ever split up what the juggle will be like to make sure all the kids get to see both parents? That will be one crowded McDonald's parking lot when they make the switch. Of course Billy Bob will be honking the whole time, calling everyone sport because he can't remember the kid's names, making cat calls at Brad, while chewing gum and drinking booze and asking Angelina when they were going to do it again. Good times.

Octuplet Mom Nadya Suleman Speaks

NBC interviewed the octuplet mom and the interview is going to be aired in its entirety on Monday during sweeps and will go head to head against the US Airways crew over on CBS which is devoting their entire morning to that story. Hmmm, airline crew saving 150 lives or mom who has created 14 lives. It will be interesting to see which show gets higher ratings.

The octuplet mom says a bunch of crazy things in her interview about how she felt powerless as a child. Ummm, most children feel powerless. I don't think that is a new feeling and doesn't usually make them want to go off and have 14 kids. The thing that gets me about this is that she says that she tried for seven or 8 years to have a baby before she finally had one. OK, lets do the math, shall we. She is 33. Her oldest child is 7 so that means she was 26 when she had her oldest child. 7 or 8 years of actively trying to have a child would put her at 18 or 19 when she started trying. Interesting.

Anyway, below is the excerpt from her interview.

I Feel Sorry For Jennifer Aniston

I actually never thought I would ever write the words in the headline unless of course you know someone died or something that she knew. Oh, and if she got a grey hair or there was a pot shortage and she didn't have any that she was growing. I don't know if she is growing any, but would it really shock you if she was? No, the reason I feel sorry for her is because Bret Michaels is in love with her. Apparently he isn't going to stop professing his love for her until he gets her attention.

Earlier this week he tried to get people to pay attention to his proclamation of love for her but no one really paid him any mind. But, to prove he was serious he has been talking about it every chance he has had since then. Seriously, it is like high school. Earlier in the week he had a friend call and e-mail some media outlets saying that Bret liked Jen and when that didn't work, Bret started calling them himself. Now, Bret, I don't know what to tell you man, but I think you are probably going to strike out on this one. Hell, I know you are.

Have you seen the women on your show? Yeah, and still you slept with all of them. It isn't like you have a very discerning palate when it comes to this and now you want to add Jennifer to the feast? I don't think so. No, your best chance was before you became a balding, yet long haired Gallagher looking caricature of your former self. That was your only chance to get Jen. You needed to get her when she and Courteney kept alternating Adam Duritz like he was choice beef.

I know what it is like to have those unrequited crushes Bret. I have had and have lots and lots of them. My best advice to you is on your next show, have the casting agents find you a bunch of Jennifer Aniston look-a-likes, but strippers and porn stars of course. And if that doesn't work go find C.C. Deville, put a wig on him and call him Jennifer.

Ted C Blind Item

This baby's sure to break a lotta hearts out there. Now, it's certainly not news that Nevis Divine is undeniably sexy. He's got a steady following from fans and paparazzi to a bevy of nearly naked gals, all vying for a piece of luscious Nev's sorta hairy frame.

But as so often is the case with the hugely slobbered set, Nevis doesn't always look to the chicks to ignite his fire. In fact, we very nearly could have a potential Toothy Tile on our hands, 'cause just like old beloved Tooth, boy Divine was once as carefree with his attraction to guys as he now is with the fairer sex:

Nevis has been famous for a while now, but his white-hot infamy's only recently been building. And we just learned that only a couple of years ago, N.D. showed up to a very prominent Industry function, and as his date, brought along another man. Love this dude's nerve! As N.D. introduced his non-famous plus one, Nevis-babe was sure to label his companion a boyfriend, while the two were nonchalantly "couply" all evening, say those who hang with Mr. D now as they did then.

And no, we're most decidedly not saying this was a boy-date who was simply a friend, but a friend with nooky benefits, for sure. Pals close to our semicloseted heartthrob claim that N.D. would "fool around" with guys sometimes, but that he considered it "no big deal."

Which is ironic because, really, it isn't. At least, not until one of those fooler-arounders heads to the nearest checkbook-dispensing tabloid office.

And it ain't: Robert Buckley, Corbin Bleu, Penn Badgley

Thursday, February 05, 2009

Today's Blind Items

Been awhile since I did a rock star one. This now married B+ rock star and father with A+ name recognition had a very weird crab obsession. No, not the eating kind. Seems that whenever he went on the road and decided to have some groupie sex, the women he decided to be with had to be completely shaved because he was paranoid about crabs. If she wasn't, she had to right then. Seems he had been the recipient of the infestation not once, but twice and had to do some explaining when he got home from the road.

Random Photos Part One

Lux Interior - RIP
Everyone always seems to like when I put Aaron Eckhart in the photos so here he is with designer Anya Hindmarch.
This was not Amy Smart on a red carpet, so don't jump all over even though the guys might like to. She was actually filming a music video.
Have I told you how much I love Celina Carvajal? And, no it has nothing to do with the fact she is a Facebook friend and reads the blog. OK, maybe it does a little.
One of the few times I have been scared of Cindy Crawford.
Is that? I think it is. Clive Owen is wearing velvet. Who wants to touch?
Cheryl Tiegs was in the same music video as Amy Smart. Cheryl still looks great.
David Bromberg - New York
This relationship between David Katzenberg and Nicky Hilton must be over a year by now right?
I love Helena Christensen, but something seems wrong with this photo of her.
Nothing really seems wrong with this photo of Hilary Duff though. Believe me, I'm looking.
That is a lot of coffee even for Hugh Jackman.
This is priceless. Not just the look on Henry Rollins face, but that he and Verdine White posed together.
I will say it. Fergie looks good here. Josh always looks good.
Is it just me but does it seem like Jane Seymour is always wearing red?
Lindsay Price standing at attention.
I will just say it is Mary Hart and leave the rest to all of you.
The title of the movie kind of seems to fit with Michael Kors doesn't it?
This man will try any form of exercise anyone has ever thought of to get out of the house and be seen.
The too good looking to be real photo of the day goes to Olivia Palermo and Johannes Huebl.
I want all of you to try and look away from Paula's face and check out the mirror behind her. What on earth is that yellow thing she is wearing?
I don't think Rihanna is shopping for more rings. Looks like she has got them all covered.
I know, the ban, but I had to. "WTF is that $1 bill doing in there?" Thanks to Becki for the photo.
The puffy shirt finds its way on to Salma Hayek.
Salman Rushdie just so the blog seems more intelligent.
Taylor Momsen just so the blog can appeal to the lowest common denominator.
Good lord, my grandma gave Tilda Swinton her wardrobe.


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