Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The Most Ridiculous Story Of The Week - Jessica Simpson's Revenge Diet


There is nothing a tabloid that loves more than a breakup followed by the woman in the relationship getting photographed exercising. Instant diet cover. The latest example of this is OK! Magazine which talks about Jessica's revenge diet and how she has already lost ten pounds in ten days. But wait, there's more. If you buy the issue or at least can take notes at the checkout stand fast enough you can find out the exercise plan she used and her simple and easy diet.

Considering that OK! didn't actually interview Jessica for the story I find it fascinating they were able to obtain her diet and know that she has in fact lost ten pounds in ten days. Then of course, I could picture Pimpa Joe yelling at Jessica to get on the scale while he has a writer from the magazine on the phone.

Pimpa - "Jessica get on the scale. You have to lose ten pounds for me to get my money."
Jessica - "I have lost 9 pounds."
Pimpa - "Well take off your clothes and get naked. Here, let me help. I want that money. I can go buy a speedboat just like the one you bought Tony and then we can go fishing together and he can be my best friend and he will let me manage him."

I love the line on the cover which says, "Her sexy body is back." The translation is that ten pounds ago she was a fat hag who lost her boyfriend. What kind of message is that sending to anyone? It gets worse inside. In the interview with the "source," there is a quote about why Jessica is losing the weight. “She doesn’t want to give anyone more reason to not take her seriously." Umm, so the source is saying that people who weigh ten pounds more than Jessica are not taken seriously or that we as the general public don't take her seriously because she weighed ten pounds more? We don't take her seriously because she blew off her tour this last summer and didn't try and improve. She made horrible movies but thought she was great in them, and she wanted to throw herself a Barbie birthday party for her 29th birthday. I don't think any of those things had anything to do with her weight and it really ticks me off that weight is supposed to be the determining factor in everything you do.

Pimpa Joe - (to the writer) "Hang on a second will you. I need to put the phone down. I can't get her bra off with one hand."

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Plus there's the implication that she's now "ready to date!" Like people who are 10 lb. over their ideal weight don't date? Please!

canadachick said...

ICK NAST at the Papa Pimp commentary LOL

califblondy said...

I can't get her bra off with one hand."

That's sick.

ItsJustMe said...

"It really ticks me off that weight is the determining factor in everything you do."

Enty, you're a peach. I couldn't agree more.

lmnop123 said...

What's with the bra joke? I've heard comments about Jessica's father crossing the line on several websites. Did he do this or something similar to this in the past?

RocketQueen said...

I agree completely that they are degrading her (and all women) by suggesting that by being overweight (which she wasn't), she's essentially a lost cause both personally and professionally. Disgusting. No wonder eating disorders are so prevalent.

Babs said...

AnonMom, you beat me to it. Enty, I love you more for that statement than anything you've ever said on this blog. (And I love a LOT of things you've said...)

The body image beliefs that we are instilling in our daughters (AND sons) is beyond frightening. Why can't we value people for what they ARE, instead of what they look like?

Babs said...

And let me add - health threatening obesity is one thing; a few 'extra' pounds is quite different. Jess is FAR from obese.

Pookie said...

yeah! what Babs said. *applause applause* :)

leeloodallas said...

bottom pic photoshopped to look "fat" plus top pic photoshopped to look thin and you have instant tabloid story!!!
enty that pimpa joe stuff was really disturbing. doesn't he have a new singer that he's working with? jessica tweeted about it the other day. scary scary.

Audrey said...

Thanks for the being the voice of reason Enty!! For too long, women have put their lives on hold "until I lose those last 10 pounds". Enough already.

GladysKravitz said...

Enty, you rock. I agree with Babs. I already loved you for so many things you've said on this blog, but this post makes me forever loyal to you. In my opinion, this is your best post EVER.

THe only thing wrong with this story is "I can't get her bra off with one hand." That's not true. He's done it thousands of times already. Pimpa and Hulk KNOW their daughters.

ms_wonderland said...

10lbs in 10 days is physically impossible without surgery. Why do people ever fall for this BS? Oh yes, it's so that they can feel like failures when they can't do the same.

Lisa (not original) said...

Jess never lost her sexy body. She merely dressed it in unflattering clothes. No one looks thin in gigantic sweatshirts.

MISCH said...

WHEN YOU HAVE A NASTY BREAK-UP YOU EITHER EAT OR DON'T EAT....SO THEY HAVE A 50/50 CHANCE OF BEING RIGHT...BUT POOR THING...SHE'S STUPID THIN OR CHUBBY...NO GETTING AWAY FROM THAT...

Anonymous said...

That cover shot looks more like LeAnn Rimes than Jessica Simpson.

Maja With a J said...

Well said. I have high hopes for that TV show she is supposed to be doing, "the price of beauty" or something like that. I think it could be really good if she allows herself to be herself and use all the stuff that has happened to her lately, in regards to tabloids saying mean things and such, in a positive way.

captivagrl said...

I ca do without these postings, when she does something of value, i'll be happy to read about it.

jax said...

if i had to live her life the past few years, i'd slit my fuckin wrists. bloggers and media people are BRUTAL to her. please get a new target. do people get off on kicking a puppy? the girl can't win no matter what and if she stumbles, all hell breaks loose.
jess, go away and live a nice life, you can't win this one.

Enty- nice sentiment about body image..but the bra thing..ick nast indeed!

Kim said...

"Pimpa Joe - (to the writer) "Hang on a second will you. I need to put the phone down. I can't get her bra off with one hand."

That's sick. But I'm still laughing.

Unknown said...

Here's the thing: when did anyone ever take her seriously, "fat" or thin?

But I gotta say, I saw a photo of her coming out of the gym the other day and her calves are killer. Like enviable killer.

ardleighstreet said...

Actually she lost about
224lbs...it stood about 6'4" and I think Jess will be better for it.

bionic bunny! said...

@ms_ wonderland-
actually, it's NOT physically impossible. unhealthy, probably not permanent, but absolutely possible.

poor jess.

Advertisements

Popular Posts from the last 30 days