Jurassic Park Goes From Classic To Crap
Casting is underway for Jurassic Park IV. Laura Dern will reprise her role as Dr. Ellie Satler but there is no word on any of the past Park performers except that Sam Neill, of course said no. They must be paying Laura Dern a ton of money because this movie is going to be crap. Don't believe me? Here is the plot.
The government has trained the dinosaurs to carry weapons and use them for battles.
I guess maybe the idea was to bring back Godzilla, Mothra, Hulk, and every other superhero and just throw one big digital CGI jumping the shark blowout. I'm hoping that is the thinking because the idea sounds like crap and can't believe someone said, "Hell Yes. Let's spend $150M making this."
11 comments:
Unless Rodan isn't it in, I don't want nothin' to do with JP. :p
Didn't Laura Dern crap out on the first 2 sequels? I don't remember her in them. She must be hard up for money, it's too bad. I could see the idea of the government taking over the island and doing additional experiments (human-dino clone-people), but umm.. didn't bullets kill dinos in the first movie? All you need is armor-piercing. it's the same reason we don't use rhinos and elephants in battle anymore
That alright Ent. I can't even make it past the first sequel. So sequel to the sequel to the sequel doesn't hurt. And the 4th Rocky didn't hurt Sly...it's the fifth and sixth that sucked balls.
I have a big head... and little arms!
Oh man, Laura Dern is laughing all the way to the bank. I wonder who was the guy who talked the right morons into buying his pitch. That guy must be laughing even harder on the way to the bank.
I am completely bored out of my mind. Enty - where's the rest of those party pics??
Oh my God! What a horrible idea! It's amazing what is being churned out these days. You have to sift through a dozen rotten movies just to get to a good one.
Why am I the only person who finds this idea hilarious? I might actually pay to see dinosaurs carrying weapons and battling humans (and maybe, if we're lucky, each other?), as long as I can hit the reefer first--hey, it worked for Snakes on a Plane.
It could be worse...the government could be spending $150M on something like this. =)
Dear screenwriter,
I have heard of a little thing called Dino Riders. You should be hearing from their lawyers soon!
Ent - PARTY PICS - NOW!!!!!!
Cyn
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