Thursday, November 28, 2013

Nigella Lawson Assistants Trial Is Best Thing In Gossip Right Now

You know how you always want some juice in your gossip but People and US Weekly really never deliver? Most things seem watered down and tame which leaves you desperate for that sweet taste of straight gossip juice. You can't describe it but when you read it you know what it is and it just makes you want more. Even if you don't know who Nigella Lawson is other than her getting strangled by her now ex-husband while at dinner you should spend your day today while the turkey is cooking or you are stuck at work reading about the trial of her two former assistants. They are accused of stealing about $500K from Nigella's ex-husband. Here is what they have said so far.

They took the money with Nigella's permission because they kept quiet about her daily coke, pot and prescription pill usage. They say that Nigella is the biggest coke user her drug dealer knows and that not a day went by where Nigella was not wasted out of her mind on drugs. Not a day just for a year or two years, but a decade. Ten years she got wasted on all those drugs. Oh, and get this. They are going to get to question Nigella about her drug use so she is going to be up there on the stand admitting all of this and still try to keep her television career going. ABC loved her. They love her a lot less as a judge on The Taste if she is a junkie who paid off her employees so they would keep quiet and paid them using her husband's money.

When the husband found out is when he supposedly strangled her at the restaurant. It is also what he was going to say in public if Nigella did not agree to his divorce demands but she did. It turns out they came out in public anyway.

52 comments:

TalksTooMuch said...

So there you have it: an actual explanation of when it is okay to choke a woman in public. Except it's still totally not. Junkies are tough to be around, no joke. Tough doesn't even start to describe it. Choking them, still not okay.

audrey said...

Is this the woman who was on the show where the judges tasted a dish not knowing who cooked it? The woman who likes comfort food like mashed potatoes?

MISCH said...

Lets see what happens…

Freya said...

I really like Nigella. She is one of the few TV cooks who actually look like she eats and enjoys the food she prepares.

Henriette said...

From what I read, this is a big deal since slander laws are so tough in the UK. So it's not a question of if they did it, but that they are making this public.

I can see Nigella as a pill popper and a pot head, but not a coke fiend.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, but there's never an excuse for violence against anyone (gender non-specific). There's also no excuse for a chunky coke user.

Bacon Ranch said...

I would like to think assault laws are still in place in the UK.

Anonymous said...

At the end of her show, when she has an "impromptu" snack raid in her fridge, they've cleverly edited out her doing lines along side that second helping of trifle.

Bleu said...

Jesus, it seems so obvious this is a complete and utter abusive load of bullshit the husband's side is putting out to destroy this woman in public (because strangling her didn't literally kill her off in public first).

Count Jerkula said...

He wasn't choking her, he just yoked her up, to stop the yapping and tell her how it is. No squeeze, just a grab.

$500k just to hide the drug use, god knows how much on the drugs themselves. I'm not for beating women, but ANYONE rips me off for 1/2 million +, they would be lucky to get off with a beating, cause the Pine Barrens are just down the road. That is "Here's a shovel, dig your own hole" type of money.

I am glad she will be shamed in public.

Seven of Eleven said...

What a load of crap. They're accused of stealing a bunch of money, so OF COURSE it's because Nigella let them to hide HER coke habit from abusive a*hole. I hope she sues them for slander.

Kels said...

Its not ok but I'd like to see how you would react to someone spending half a mill of YOUR money on drugs!

frankie. said...

Charles Saatchi is a dark man and is out for blood after those photos ruined him. Team Nigella all the way.

Unknown said...

He is not her pimp, what gives him the right to choke her? Also, I have only done coke a couple of times but how can you eat on that shit---I couldn't for 2 days after!

Meanie Rhysie said...

She stole his money? Oh, okay, alrighty then...choke away!

Give me a fucking break!!

msgirl said...

I'm surprised this is even going to the courts as this is such obvious BS.

Violet said...

In the UK if is #teamnigella all the way. No matter what is thrown out about her everyone is on her side and Saatchi is looking worse by the second. Her mother, sister and first husband all died from cancer - her life has been far from rosy and if she takes drugs to get through then who are we to judge? He is a vile vile man whatever Count J above might say.

Cleodacat said...

I just don't buy that she's been drugged up out of her mind for the past few years, for starters she's been functional enough to be highly successful and secondly, she's drugged out and neither husband noticed until one had their money stolen and the other at the time of said choking. This reeks of employees trying to get out of trouble and a giant smear campaign that her current POS decided to jump onto in order to save his own reputation.

Kelly said...

Interested to see what happens.

Craig said...

This is a huge bunch of nonsense. It's just a character assassination. Here's why Nigella isn't a decade-long coke fiend. She's too fat.

Top-end London dealers talk about their celebrity clients, they can't help themselves. This has never come up before, ever.

I'm not suggesting she's never done any sniff. It's par for the course in London whether you have money or not. Very accessible and pretty accepted. But there is no way that woman has had a major habit for 10 years. I lost a quarter of my weight in 2 years when I had a habit.

The woman has had some serious life upheavals and may well have turned to chemicals to help her cope with her well-documented depression but I smell some major exaggeration here.

Count Jerkula said...

If this was a guy pissing away his wife's money on drugs and cover up and she cracked his head open with a frying pan, every last one of you would be singing a different tune.

If you think being fat or not is a determining factor for being a coke head, I guess you never heard of Belushi, Farley or Lange. Search em on YouTube and get acquainted with comedy gold. Oh, Kinison too.

zeopanonica said...

What Cleodacat said x2... Also, SHE IS NOT FAT... Jesus people!

Craig said...

You are getting the wrong end of the stick Count. Nigella was independently wealthy, very much so, before meeting Saatchi after her husband's death. She's not accused of anything. The assistants are accused of stealing his money. Not on her behalf or for her alleged drug use, but for themselves. Their excuse is that she allowed it for them to keep quiet about her drug use.
I'm still calling bullshit. She's exhibited no signs or behaviour of being even an infrequent charlie user and I've known some coke-fiends.

This boils down to two people who took his cash but they say they had permission from his wife.

marie-ski said...

Wow, the almighty count has fallen.

Count Jerkula said...

Fallen? I think Marie-ski has been dippin into Hi-gella's stash.

marie-ski said...

Jk count. I do find it pretty funny she used his money to shut them up
instead of hers. If that's what really happened.

TalksTooMuch said...

That's not true, count, but throw a couple of 18-year old mistresses in there and you'd definitely get support from some.

Of course you hope she gets shamed in public. Of course it's her fault she got strangled. Of course you don't believe in beating women BUT.

Count Jerkula said...

Man, woman or child, steal from me and there are consequences.

I still say it was a yoke up and not a choke. Neck is soft meat, you would see it if he was squeezing. Plus, it ain't like she was up against a wall. All she had to do was sit back in her chair to get his hand off her.

Yes public shaming on par of what happened to her ex. Now that it had been revealed that she likely told him of the deug use and pay offs while they were at the cafe, it is likely she tipped off the paps, hoping to get pics of a meltdown to use in the divorce. She failed.

Flora Goforth said...

Team Nigella.

marie-ski said...

If he was willing to that in public, what has he been doing behind closed doors?
I could understand if she put their kid's is danger (not sure they have any) but doing that over what he probably spends on a car is a bit much.

Count Jerkula said...

Come on Marie-ski, like it was an everyday occurence that his wife told him she was a coke fiend and let the assistants rip him off for hundreds of thousands to keep quiet about it. That os a far cry from "honey I burnt the meatloaf." It probably took a ton of self control not to stick a fork in her eye.

feraltart said...

Nigella is innocent until proven guilty, at this point in time her scumbag ex-husband is known to have throttled her, in public. I shudder to think what happened behind closed doors.

8====D KermitGossnellKnobjob said...

#TeamNigella
A beater can lie, and being a junkie doesn't mean deserving torture.

Jessie said...

Why so much hate for Nigella, Ent? Calling her a junkie? This story is so over the top and unbelievable.

ForSure said...

Nigella knew Saatchi before her husband died, they were all friends. Her husband could see what was developing between them as his illness progressed and the story is that he gave them their blessing before he died. They do not have children together, they each have children of their own. His are older than hers.


The two former assistants are sisters from Italy who were hired by Saatchi to work for both of them. I would not be surprised if he is somehow trying to use this whole sordid mess to his advantage and I'm glad to hear it's not working.

TalksTooMuch said...

I couldn't say, but since the odds of that ever happening are about as likely as that actually being what happened with Lawson / Saatchi.

Kathleen said...

And we're accepting their story at face value ... why? And it's convenient for him to say that's why he was strangling at that moment when he has been seen getting physically abusive in the past. Yeah. What serendipity for him that there were cameras at the very moment he found out about it ... in a public place. Because of course he was out to lunch at a restaurant the moment he found out. Naturally. We all find out devastating, highly personal information like our wife is a junkie in public. At a restaurant.

Unknown said...

If true she would look haggard after so many years of drug abuse, ala Lohan. Lohan looks 42! I've seen Nigella in person with little makeup, she looks lovely.

Jennabean said...

Idk count maybe it's a jersey thing? I'm with you a hundred percent

OKay said...

I'd think she'd have to be wasted every day for ten years just to be with that guy. Also, I kinda feel like he convinced those assistants to lie in order to publicly humiliate his wife.

auntliddy said...

I dont see nigella as a 10 year coke addict. She isnt paranoid, skanky, or has bad skin. I yhink he and these two chicks are gas lighting her. Somethingbis fushy but i dont think coke is the problem. And who the f*ck uses choking as a drug treatment?!

Count Jerkula said...

@jennabean: could be the high frequency of cokeheads in NJ leads to the low tolerance. I have lumped up a couple cokehead dudes, but never a cokey chick. I haven't been dumb enough to let a cokey chick near anything I care about, aside from my dick.

Crack dealers in Trenton don't punch chicks who beat them for money. They throw bricks through their car window. I knew one chick who got hit in the head and smacked up her hubbies Benz, and another who had to get stitches in her face from the brick and glass.

HannahBanana said...

It's interesting that these assistants never mentioned this, til now. I think Saatchi paid them to say this shit about her. He's a real uber prick.

HannahBanana said...

@Count, curious, I wonder why u say just about EVERYTHING on this site is lies & bullshit. Yet, for whatever reason, you're buying this story? Interesting. You do know she was Rich looooooong before him, right?

Count Jerkula said...

I'm not one of the ones who claims every blind is bullshit, Hannah. I have seen enough fucked up stuff in my life to realize anything is possible and that truth is way more fucked up than fiction.

Also, I saw this story in the NY Daily News yesterday. With the Post & WSJ owned by Murdoch and Newsday owned by the Dolans, the NY Daily News is the only viable source for integrity in daily reporting. Award winning investigative journalists and the best damn sports section in the country, too.

HannahBanana said...

I see. Thanks for the clarification. I

Sandy said...

I call BS on all of this. So Nigella is a long-time cokehead - why was she so zaftig the whole time? She's always struggled with her weight - habitual cokeheads are usually skin and bones (hint: THAT'S WHY THEY LIKE COKE).

Also, even if she's been taking drugs regularly for years, she's not an anomaly in the UK or Hollywood, she's not dealing or giving them to her kids (although I'm sure that's Saatchi's next gambit) and OMG, if I were married to that abusive, controlling asshole, I'd be on drugs all the time.

The timing of these "revelations" is a little too pat, too. If Nigella had indeed been a huge addict with no awareness of her minions bilking her constantly, it would have been written about or at least shown up in a blind, especially in scandal-hungry Britain. She's too high-profile for "erratic behavior" to have been off the tabloid radar there. They're like jackals.

Nah, all of this is crap from Saatch's camp. That dickhead really can't let any of this go. He was outed as an abuser, and now he's determined to make everyone believe that Lawson "forced" him into that role. What an asshat.

Goodnight said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Goodnight said...

I adore Nigella and I'm really horrified that this asshole has hurt her so badly. What she went through with her first husband was so tragic and I don't blame her for needing chemicals to cope.

She has always had a very curvy body so I find it very very very hard to believe she's a massive coke fiend. Pot and pills I can believe but no judgement whatsoever for me.

Fuck you enties for implying the physical abuse was justified and okay in some way because of what two people accused of stealing 500,000 dollars are saying in their defense. Seriously, why the fuck believe them? What credibility do they have that you'd believe their word over hers?

FlirtyChick74 said...

I don't condone the abuse at all. It is terrible and no one deserves that. That being said, human behavior isn't as clean cut or consistent as you'd like it to be. I don't know Nigella. I don't know who her connections are and why she's escaped public scrutiny if she is indeed a drug addict. The world is full of seemingly lovely people doing terrible things. Count seems to have quite a bit of experience with drug addicts and what he said about Belushi and the rest seems probable to me. I've known some high functioning alcoholics who look as beautiful as a fresh picked rose with or without makeup yet these people have the drinking acumen of Nic Cage in Leaving Las Vegas. They're skinnier than I am, which is so unfair.

PJJ said...

Hahaha

Dexamyl said...

I love that she was a raging dope fiend for 10 years but her husband knew nothing about it until now. Right.

Or that the assistants never cooked up this explanation until now...

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