Monday, March 19, 2018

Blind Item #4

This former A+ list athlete who recently retired to enjoy the life of celebrity/part-time reality star/frequent strip club patron is developing a line of custom collectible bats to commemorate his home runs.  For whatever reason, his A list girlfriend is the money behind the venture, although it is technically billed as a joint venture. 

The original artwork for the collectibles is very on-brand - uses a former team's color scheme, very masculine.

The artwork his girlfriend wants used is very off-brand - feminine colors with lots of pastels and much too feminine for this type of item.  Looks more like what you would see used for a line of cosmetics or skin care.

Our former athlete's people want to go with the original artwork because they know it makes more sense with the theme for sports collectibles.  The girlfriend is pushing hard for her vision.  Since she is the real money behind the venture, she's got big sway. The boyfriend is stuck in the middle.

Will be interesting to see if money beats out good business sense in this venture.

27 comments:

Tricia13 said...

ARod?

andrea said...

A rod and Jlo.

Tricia13 said...

And A list every thing in her mi d Jlo

Brayson87 said...

Designer bats, how luxurious.

totaji said...

Are these bats battery operated?

Jack_H said...

Bedazzled jersey and gloves?

justanothergossipgirl said...

Allegedly he is worth 480 million dollars, so why does he need money from JLo? Makes no sense....

Shawny said...

Feminine bats...hilarious. Do both and see which ones sell. It’s not that big a deal.

Scandi Sanskrit said...

Pastel bedazzled bats sound like they’re good for going “Lemonade” like Beyoncé... 🌶🌋🔥✨ #HotSauce

Dahling said...

@Scandi - or for going all Carrie Underwood on a souped up four wheel drive. She probably shoulda done that way earlier "Before he Beats!".

Scandi Sanskrit said...

To be fair, Enty, Manchester City’s kit is technically pastel (it’s a light sky blue colour). But I get that that’s part of the joke since they’re just a parody club...

*Quietly walks out of the room before Noel Gallagher hunts me down to murder me*

Scandi Sanskrit said...

PS: And their away jersey’s magenta... 🌺

Ernie McCracken said...

How about travel-sized, luxury bats for the Hollywood Lady needing to "beat off" entitled producers and directors. Something with flair for a high-end, niche market.

T. W. said...

@Ernie McCracken - Thank you for my laugh today.

longtimereader said...

@Scandi - man city still drew a 30k crowd when they were two divisions down a decade or so back, that's a team with real fans. We still used to pull 20-25k the year we were down there.

kiki71 said...

This is ridiculous. Definitely ARod and JLo. He just wants to NOT spend his own money if it fails and still get his way. It will fail as a female focused line. You could have a SUB line of it that caters to the more feminine aesthetic but really people buying bats play ball and that is men/their sons/maybe their daughters. My son plays Little League and he has a few girls on his team but women in baseball is rare. Maybe a softball superstar could cater to that clientelle but otherwise the whole idea is ridiculous and makes no sense. A Rod sells bats to and for guys as a figurehead.

Nawlins Jim said...

ARod is famously cheap-he apparently made Cameron pay for their dates-including hookers and blow-while they were together

Samantha Willow said...

lmao battery operated...

jessorella said...

Do it in both sets of colours!

Jen Ty said...

More girls and women play baseball than you think - heck even I played baseball recreationally. More women should play baseball.

Just taking a Google boo and the 2018 Women's Baseball World Cup is being held in Florida this summer. Only the 8th year. But look at the WNBA. Gotta start somewhere.

I don't think these competitive women would be caught dead with frou frou bats either. They probably have their favourite male players and they would buy those bats - A Rod is not a baseball player I would respect.

Poppymann said...

This is obviously Denagamage Praboth Mahela de Silva Jayawardene the Sri Lankan batsman.

GOPinsider said...

Do the hats have an illustration of the syringes he used to inject the PEDs he used to hit all those home runs?

Scandi Sanskrit said...

“FROU-FROU BAT”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

I would proudly be seen in a girly bat. I’m unapologetically girly like that, to an extreme. Like if I had a big superhero franchise, I’d see themed/branded nail polish for merchandise.

What’s this BS about people being offended about how Lego used to be gender-neutral and bashing them for making pastel bricks like it’s a crime to enjoy pink things? Isn’t THAT (the girl-shaming) sexism?

I get that in the context of the blind item, Sugar Mama should’ve stuck to the original thème (because what’s the point of something being branded if there’s nothing to identify the brand). Maybe she should just start her own line of WAG Bats™.

Scandi Sanskrit said...

YEAH. Like do a “For Him/Them/It” and “For Her/Them/It” thing.

Scandi Sanskrit said...

Oh and speaking of WAGs, Posh should’ve designed her own set of footballs. They’d be a shiny black, minimalist, and appear to be almost seamless with gold prints/engravings that read “POSH/BECKHAM”.

They’d be these heavy balls that don’t bounce a lot—like you’d kick it and the thing would just roll, fitting to her personality (just like how she never smiles).

orangesoda said...

Man Shitty drawing in a crowd of real fans?! Hah! You must be from Stockport. Or Thailand.

Scandi Sanskrit said...

To be fair, Monty Python has “real fans” too...

*In all seriousness, tho, I am from SEAsia and I remember the old days when Oasis and Blur and Suede and the Spice Girls and the European boybands were big. And you’d have MU, Liverpool, Arsenal, etc. And I was genuinely confused that Man City existed? I was like, “that’s so weird of Manchester to have to clubs like that? Isn’t that like a country having two national teams?” People think I’m just being mean, but it was really based on my being a clueless foreigner.

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