Monday, May 28, 2007

ZX-Because If I'm Going To Post On A Holiday, Then I Appreciate Those Of You Who Read It On A Holiday

This is not my normal computer for creating posts and for some reason, when I copy and paste ZX's e-mail the font is out of whack, so I hope it doesn't offend your sensibilities much.

Filming was awesome beans. Got there only to
be told by the director that the locations
people had just found out that they
could not discharge firearms after ten,
so my scene which was supposed to be first up
was now...


Well, they didn't know, but I could just hang
out in my trailer until further notice.
This is just the way it goes sometimes,
and I like being on set, so I chatted with
the teamsters and caterers and ate some pork ribs
and carrot cake and made myself comfortable.
Well, as comfortable as I could be with a
nine-months-ready-to-pop pregnancy belly strapped
to my stomach, which I kept accidentally
ramming into people and equipment.



By the ninth hour, after not having filmed a thing,
I was like, "Get this fucking demon spawn outta me!!!"
I guess if I can't take nine hours, I can't take nine
months just yet, but I think that nine month gestation
is just to get used to the idea of not being a selfish
pig and thinking of someone else's needs.
I think I will be a good mother as long as I don't
forget my baby on an elevator or lose it in a parking
garage.

Rather convenient that I got in two accidents in as many
weeks. The Nissan Lady is going to be alright after all.
I had waited with her after the crash, since her car was
totalled, for the tow truck driver to come. Apparently
the aforementioned tow truck bastard told the woman to
"Sue the shit out of" me, and when I called the wonderful,
kind Nissan Lady the next day to make sure my insurance
was taking care of her, she told me that he and everyone
else told her to go for the millions I don't have, but
I seemed like a "decent person," and this was the kind
of thing that could happen to anyone.

I felt a little dirtier about the cosmetic concealment,
but if she's going to be okay, which is the important
part, then I don't really need the
"shit sued outta" me.

I went to take my convertible in from the 16-yr.-old
-smashup and got lost on the way there, convinced
that Oxnard was an exit off of the 405. Well, I
couldn't find it anywhere and ended up being 45 minutes
late and the guy had already left for lunch.

Ordinarily, especially since it was my fault, I would
have just hunkered down with my scripts in their
waiting room with their free diet cokes, but I had to
get home to meet the OTHER adjuster who was coming over
to my house to photograph my I'm-an-idiot-smashup.

So I told the adjusters "I rescheduled my work to come
here. I have to get back!" The receptionist was nice
enough not to ask what kind of fantastically important
work I could be returning to in a dog-haired covered
sweatsuit, but I could see it in her eye, so I
rescheduled the I'm-an-idiot guy and waited.

Finally, they rented me a car and I tooled home. The
adjuster took photos of the twisted wreckage and I
opened the door to let him photograph the airbag.

There, by the pedals, beneath a piece of the horn which
had ripped free due to the airbag, was the guilty lip gloss.
He snapped away.

I wonder how many pictures the insurance companies have of
wayward cosmetics. I am glad, however, that I was not
putting on mascara.

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

(((thank you, zx, for posting on a holiday))) hope you've had a good wkend.

now wth didn't you take the lipgloss??? you know some mechanic is going to steal and ebay it.

xoxo

Anonymous said...

Love the fake-o belly, ZX!

Can't wait for the reveal!

Anonymous said...

Has anyone ruled out Anna Paquin as ZX?...
Jo

Anonymous said...

Here's a list of celebrities that photo agency Wireimage caught at Cochella. Anna Paquin is not on the list.

http://www.wireimage.com/FeaturedEvents/2486

Anonymous said...

Thanks anon 1:16 -- I subsequently came across a facetious comment that ENT made regarding Paquin's dental issue so I presume that this is not someone who is liaising with him!

Anonymous said...

Could ZX be Amber Tamblyn??

Check out her Wikipedia.. she's a poet (which would explain her great writing abilities). Could definitely see her as the Thora Birch's role in American Beauty. She's very close to her father...

Hmmmm...

Anonymous said...

Tamblyn was ruled out at some point mid last week by ent himself.

Anonymous said...

Damn.

Anonymous said...

Cant you people just enjoy the blog? We're getting a damn reveal in a week. Hello.

BTW, thanks ZX for posting! I hope that you'll continue even after you know that we know who you are. :)

Anonymous said...

So sorry to anon 1:47 -- you forgot to issue the memorandum when the guessing game was to have ceased.
I realize that it is highly offensive to have people still questioning the identity of a mysterious actress who is producing entertaining prose for our enjoyment and discussion.
Note to all to refrain from any further discussions pertaining to the identity of the engaging ZX! Kindly limit all comments to direct pats on the back and ass kissy shows of appreciation cause you know that's good reading!

kellygirl said...

Yikes, some could stand to start Happy Hour a little early.
no, LinZ, not you. I was talking to the posters.

So, does anyone else get the hint: Ali Larter has a bf?
Apparently, her BF is some dude Azazel Jacobs, director of nothing I'd heard of, son of Ken Jacobs (also director of nothing I'd heard of). Are we supposing that Azazel used to be BF of ZX? Wow, that would require some serious inside-Hollywood knowledge. OR does Ali Larter's character on Heroes have a BF????? I don't watch the show.
Any feedback?

Anonymous said...

I think the hint is just stating that Ali Larter, though she been guessed at many times before, is out since she does in fact have a boyfriend where ZX does not.

Anonymous said...

anon 2:08: Excellent. Glad you're all clear now. ;)

Moving on.

O/T, her toes are cute.

kellygirl said...

2:37, thanks for simplifying (perhaps I overanalyzed that one). Time to head out for some fresh air and sun.

Anonymous said...

and a margarita!!!

Anonymous said...

ZX - Happy Memorial Day and Thanks so much for describing your day on a movie set! It's something I will always regret not persuing, so I love to read about others experiences.

And PLEASE DON'T PUT MAKEUP ON WHILE YOUR'RE DRIVING!!!!!

We don't want to lose you.

Cyn - I really don't care if ZX wants to reveal or not. But I DO think she should join us at CDANCON...

Anonymous said...

"allegra coleman"?

Far be it for me to even INSINUATE this may be a gag, but my finals at SMC (yes, the same SMC that ZX wants to take an English class) start on Tuesday... Hmmm, one day after the big reveal. Just in time to wrap up a thesis? I guess we'll find out.

That being said, I sincerely HOPE this is fabricated because I drive in LA everyday and don't want to have to worry about "running into" this actress someday. So if ZX turns out to be real, will you please post your schedule so I can stay far away from your make-up? Hehehe...

Anonymous said...

OMG, that is the scariest glowing-alien-inside belly I've ever seen!!!!!!!
Glad you're not getting sued for a gazillion $$. That would suck.

Anonymous said...

Thanks ZX for your description on your day on the set and for posting on the holiday, thanks EL for doing the same.

Yes 9 mths of pregnancy is long and hard....for some women, LOL.

Anonymous said...

ZX, I'm enjoying reading your blogs. Please keep posting.

And I'm glad to hear you aren't getting sued for millions.

-Miss X :)

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad the Nissan lady was ok, and that you won't be sued. I haven't commented on a lot of your posts, but have truly enjoyed them all. Now i am really looking forward to the reveal. I have no clue who you are,- guess I am still thinking you might be Molly Sims. Or has that been ruled out by now?

F.

Anonymous said...

be careful girlie. a mascara wand will smudge all over the forehead and cheeks... it's the eyeliner pencils that you need to watch out for. poke an eye out.

Anonymous said...

Well, the pregnant belly photo suggests that ZX is of the caucasian persuasion. That's another hint (so probably not Jessica Alba or Eva Mendes).

Anonymous said...

Wow, isnt it sickening how quick people want to sue? It just disgusts me how with every little thing, people are completely sue happy these days. -oops...guess if it were not for those people, ENT wouldnt have a job :) sorry bud, no offense there!
Glad to hear that all worked out for you and for future referance, any eye makeup must be done at a stoplight, gloss, blush and foundation is usually good to go on straightaways :) Usually...

-spressogrl

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