Scarlett Johansson Is A Clone
I get all kinds of e-mails from all kinds of people from all over the world. Sometimes, the e-mails tend to be a little on the "I bet this person lives alone" side, but they are all still fun to read. Speaking of living alone, this e-mail came from Serge. I ignored it the first ten times that Serge sent it to me, but obviously it is important to Serge and it is about a celebrity, so I guess we can give Serge a chance to express his opinions. Plus, Scarlett is on the cover of Paris Vogue anyway, so it gives me an excuse to post the photo without having to write something about her. I just let Serge handle the writing part.
Oh, and I wouldn't dream of adding or deleting anything. This is all Serge. If Serge is to be believed, Ryan Reynolds is also under the control of clones.
IT IS NOT A SPAM, but if you received that message second and plus time JUST CLICK DELETE button and have a nice day. Don't feel bad, please understand original Scarlett's family very desperate to shut down that humiliating antichristian "actress" clones line career development. Hello dear Ladies and Gentlemen! I would like inform you that Scarlett Johansson ?actress? actually is a clone from original person Scarlett Galabekian last name, who has nothing with acting career, surname Galabekian, because of adoption happened in 1992. Clones was created illegally by using stolen biological material. Original person is very nice (not d**n sexy),most important - CHRISTIAN young lady! I'll tell you more,those clones (it's not only one) made in GERMANY - world leader manufacturer of humans clones, it is in Ludwigshafen am Rhein, Rhineland-Palatinate, Mr. Helmut Kohl home town. You can not even imaging the scale of the cloning activity. But warning! Helmut Kohl clone staff strictly controlling all their clones (at least they trying) spreading around the world, they are very accurate with that, some of them are still NAZI type disciplined and mind controlled clones, so be careful get close with clones you will be controlled as well. Original person is not happy with those movies, images, video, rumors and etc. spreading on media in that way it would be really nice if we all will try slow down that ''actress'' career development, original Scarlett will really appreciated that. Please remember that original Scarlett's family did not authorize any activity with stolen biological materials, no matter what form it was created in it was stolen and it is stolen. It all need to be delivered to authorize personals control in Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles. Original Scarlett never was engaged, by the way!
Her close friend
Serge G.
P.S. CONTROLLING ACTIVITY OF ANY CLONES IS US MILITARY OPERATION.
41 comments:
I'm sorry Enty that you have to deal with the crazies. You and Katie have something in common, sorta.
BEST POST EVER! This is sort of like those SPAM con emails from Zimbabwe. Also, what was that movie Scar did a few years ago with Ewan McGregor where they WERE clones... maybe this dude's meds + acid confused him after watching that movie...
camel, I agree it's similar to the Zimbabwe scams but Serge didn't ask for money. LOL!
To "The Camel":
The movie that you're thinking about was The Island...GOOD flick!
hahaha, this post totally cracks my shit up!
I always thought there was something a bit "off" about her. Now I know wahy. Damn those germans and their cloning activity.
wahy = why. My clone can't type.
Has anyone seen my tin foil hat. . .
Won't we all feel stupid when Woodward and Bernstein prove Serge was right! All the President's Clones. . . .
I hear she's now filming "The CLONE Ranger."
[rimshot]
My Monday just perked up. Thanks Ent. Now I know I'm not the only weirdo magnet.
I love this guy! He posts on our Web site anytime we mention Scarlett in an article. I thought he was just a local crazy but I'm glad the crazy is spreading!!
This guy's been telling the ladies over at Jezebel.com the same thing.
Hey Serge....I'm having a party and I want to invite you to be the entertainment. Please contact my spirit guide Magnolia Thunderpussy to rsvp. Cheers.
Enty, you need a new weekly "from Enty's inbox" feature. :)
lol serge! wheeeeee! maniac mondays! i love it. enty, you should totally give us a loony post to start the week every week. :)
made my day that much better! i love it
Hey, Serge - here's another secret:
Soylent Green is PEOPLE!
Ahem, if Scarlett IS a clone could you ask Serge for the address so I can order one?
KThanxBAI
sometimes i can't help but think, what if these crazy conspiracist emails are true and the poor things are basically talking to the wind b/c no 'sane' human being would ever believe such an outlandish idea? Really the main reason they get ignored is b/c the grammar is so horrible that we automatically dismiss them as dumb. If you're going to try to convince me that Scarlett Johanssen is a clone I'm going to need you to try proofreading, learning how to spell, and eliminating the run-on sentences and errant punctuation marks.
i'm not that far gone (yet). I just get bored and start wondering. Like, what if we replaced the name Scarlet with Katie? Would as many of us be so dismissive then?
This explains so much.
So THAT'S what he's been up to since those Beverly Hills Cop movies! Too many espressos with a twist of lay-man went to his head...tsk tsk...
If I send those nice German folks my hairbrush and toothbrush, can they crank out 2 or 3 more of me? I'll send one to my job, another one can clean up around here, and the third can go run errands while I sleep....
Awesome!
Serge Darling,
Could you clarify as to whether the Germans or US Military are controlling the clones? Just want to know how to search on ebay when ordering one of my own.
XOXO
i saw this somewhere else.
hmmm.. maybe if you switch the word "clone" with the word "zombie".....
Where can I order a clone of Hugh Jackman? I mean if they can clone a blasted sheep ---.
Serge, Why pick ScarJo? Why not say Marilym Monroe? Has the original Scarlet met her clone? Can they be in the same place at the same time?
Are the clones only Christans? Are there no Jews,Muslim, Atheists?
Babs, "Clone Alone" would be a nice project for the non-original Scarlett.
I hope both original Scarlett and Clone Scarlett have excellent security. That goes for Enty, as well. Eghads.
LOL @ comments...
WOW, I had no idea clones were actually productive. I thought they just stood there like manikins not knowing what to do, think or say. Hmmm...Amazing! We learn something new everyday folks!
Now, what I'm really wondering is, is this guy:
A. Joking (Cause it's pretty darn hilarious)
B. Crazy and out and about in somewhere in the world (Scary)
C. Crazy and in an institution (Do they have computer access nowadays?)
What a dumbass. Everyone knows Scarlett Johanssen's a Jew, not a Christian.
Dammit, Joaquin! I hope you kept your tin hat from Signs!
I KNEW IT!! That was fuckin' awesome! Thanks for sharing Enty!!
Have no words.
serge as in serge gainsberg?
it is signed serge g. and this is from a french person, right?
that would be wicked cool.
serge as in serge gainsberg?
it is signed serge g. and this is from a french person, right?
that would be wicked cool.
Crazy people are fun!
Reminds me of the movie It's All About Love, starring none other than Joaquin Phoenix. hehe
Believe it or not, this is not the first time I've seen this... I write for another entertainment site and this was sent to me several months ago. If cloning technology has been perfected so as to create creatures as gorgeous as Scarlett, I say cheers to them! : )
Best.Letter.Ever. I love it.
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