Your Turn
LeAnn Rimes says that her stepsons sometimes call her mom. Do you think she should tell them not to?
Tuesday, April 09, 2013
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69 comments:
I don't care, but she is probably making it up.
it's prolly just by accident.
haven't you every accidently (as a small child) called your teacher 'mom' and then got teased about it??
I wld say," I am delighted you think if me that way- you guys are lucky to have a mom and stepmom who love you very much. ". But no, i wldnt tell them to stop. They hv to be confused enough as it is. Ot, anyone else notice all pics of leann lately are solo, no eddie? Mb hes working?
They already HAVE a mom. She is their STEP mom. Sounds to me like she's trying to over-step boundaries with someone else's children and doesn't know her place.
They are like 8 and 10, right? They know that Brandi is their mom and she is the step-mom. If they like Leann, then more power to the family...even though she is a total nut-job.
@Auntliddy he is probably working his cheating scandals! HA. Sorry to laugh as the situation isnt funny but she is the WORST. And an idiot if she thinks Eddie isn't or hasn't cheated on her yet.
This is such a loaded question because I can't stand Falcor and I'm solidly team Brandi! But in general, I think it's fine (and actually good) to call the stepmom some version of "mom," just not the same one that they use for their real mom. Families with two grandmas come up with official titles for each grandma so as not to confuse them (e.g. Meemaw, Nana, Granny. Mine insisted on being called "Grandy"). I think the same rule should apply for step-parents
I think that I called my first grade teacher "Mommy" once. Maybe that's what one of Eddie's kids did.
If this is the truth (I don't believe her), I'd say that there's no problem if the kids call her that as long as they're not being coerced into it. Some kids are lucky enough to have good relationships with their step-parents.
As a mom and step mom I don't care but I wouldn't go telling the world about it out of respect for their mom. Of course respect for their mom is something she lacks...
She can't win on this.
If she lets them she oversteps and if she corrects them - she would be considered cold and setting boundaries for other people's kids.
If its their choice, I say leave it alone
@VIPblonde Ditto
Um... she should stop telling THE PRESS about it. The kids are fine.
Come on, she obviously told them to call her "mom," because that's the way she rolls. In her situation, it's obviously completely inappropriate.
I wouldn't be surprised if she's encouraged/guilted them to call her that. I'd probably feel uncomfortable if my S.O.'s kids w/another woman started calling me mom, unless it was a situation where she died/left when they were very young and I was there from early on. I'd think that's up to their dad and mom to discuss so the mom doesn't feel upset/weird.
I think she would never tell them not to call her mom, because it would f-up her delusions.
I'd never let my son call anyone mom, except for his mom and I would hope to get the same respect.
If I had a step-child, I would not want him/her to call me mom if their mother were still very much alive and in the picture(or vice versa). It just seems wrong.
Leann is probably just trying to push Brandi's buttons for the millionth time with that one so I'll take it with a grain if salt.
Her and her husband have no respect, that's why we hear about this crap. Keep it at home.
If a little one calls their step-mom "mom" it is a natural slip and should NOT be corrected. Imagine how horrible to have your step-mom say "I'm not your mother-don't call me that!".
But it should be private, strictly between the stepparent and the child. LeAnn doesn't know the meaning of "private".
Both women involved need to read the book "Noone's the b$&@@" It needs to be left to the kids to decide what they're comfortable with and these ladies need to just get over it. I have put up with a lot of crap & crazy stuff from my bonus daughter's mom & kept my mouth shut because I love that little girl with all my heart. I have to wonder if LeAnn feels the same if she's willing to publicly cat fight with these boy's mother.
As a step father the kids called me dad, never asked them to, they just did, the were very young. don't think this is even a story, sounds like a lot of emotional baggage on parents part. My wife is adopted as well as her brother, they called their parents mom and dad and each other brother and sister, not step, adopted or anything else, a family is a family, get over the drama.
My kindergartner called me by her teachers name one day, and her teacher is a man. I don't think the child should be corrected but I also dont think that it should be published. I would never do that to my step-son's Mom.
It can be handled, my stepson calls me mom2. He had been calling me mom, and I sent him a card signing it dad and mom2. It has worked out fine for 25 years. I'm also on friendly terms with his mom.
Like MichaelK said over on Dlisted, it's probably more like, "you're NOT MY MOTHER!" Or maybe they're calling her "Smother" and she just has her head so far up her ass, she misunderstood them.
That's what i was going to say! I was always that kid. Just an accident. But she tends to delude herself.
+1
@Shakira. This. Most likely, it's by accident, my Grandma used to call me Vera (her younger sister,) sometimes and Diane (my younger sister,) other times. Sometimes I call my niece, Macy, Gracie (my daughter.) It happens all the time when you're in close contact. But you don't brag to the world about it (or rub their mother's face in it.)
*Accident, I swear. Maeson. Grace. Not thinking about nicknames at the time. OTOH, Maeson basically picked the name Grace by giving us the stink eye when we suggested anything else for her baby sister.
I think LeAnn Falcor rimes needs to keep her mouth shut.
I am a step mom and my step daughter calls me mom. Of course, I have raised her full time since she was 6 (she's now 14) and her real mother lives in another country soooo our situation is very different. I AM the full time mom. But even still I think as a society we have gotten a little over protective of the "mom and dad" titles. My brother's friends used to refer to my mom as "mom" whenever they were at our house. If you love someone and feel they are motherly or fatherly to you how is it disrespectful to your real mother or father to refer to a step parent as "mom?" I have a million "Aunts" that aren't blood relative but I don't think calling them auntie demeans my relationship with my real Aunts.
I agree Turkish Taffy & the Dude. I'm a stepmom & do not correct my stepchildren if they choose to call me Mom. They normally use my name, but if they call me Mom, I certainly don't mind. Especially, knowing that their own mother chastised & fussed at them many times when they accidentally called her by her first name.
I'm sure that upset her, but it was an innocent mistake which a child should not have been punished for. Our youngest child first called me "Mom" when I came to a school function. He was so proud & happy to see me. His own mother never would come to school activities. So, yes, in those instances, I think it's perfectly ok for a child to call their stepmom, "Mom". I always introduce myself to our children's friends as their stepmom. I have two stepdads. They are both very dear to me & I call them both Dad. It should be the child's choice how they are comfortable addressing the stepparent.
I dunno, my kid is twelve and he occasionally calls me mom.
But he calls my gf (we live together) by her name. She would never want him to call her mom because he has a mom he lives with half the time. I don't doubt for a minute there is very genuine affection between kiddo and gf, but he knows who mom is and I could never dream of asking him to call someone else mom. I hate hearing about guys who do try to force it on their kids because it is such an insult to their real mom and it is never cool to involve the kids in your drama as parents.
If the other parent is part of the child's life, that is hugely disrepectful. She calls herself a bonus mom and has been for a while. Poor kids.
That's very mature of you and your lady. Let the kid just be a kid.
I think it's all up to each individual family how this is handled. Everyone involved should be comfortable with the arrangement. My friends step kids call her "Mama Sara" and their biological mother's husband "Papa Jim" and all four parents are happy with this arrangement. Another friend's kid calls both him and stepdad "Dad" and he's perfectly comfortable with this. I think as long as everyone agrees it's all good.
Leann's crazy though, so who knows about this situation.
Oh boy. When I was around 6, my dad found out I was calling my step-dad "dad" and he FLIPPED OUT. I got in HUGE trouble over it. I don't even remember calling my step-dad that, but the memory of my dad finding out is very, very vivid.
I think my dad overreacted, and shouldn't have taken his anger out on me, but now that I'm a parent I understand it. I would be pretty upset if my son was calling another woman "mom." Should it be up to the step-parent to deal with it? I don't know. I guess it depends on all the people involved and how they interact with each other.
Once a 7-year-old kid of a ex-boyfriend called me mom and it freaked me out. In fact the exact words were, "Whatever happens with you and my dad, you'll always be my mom." That saddened me because he was so angry with his mother (who is very much alive and has them 50% of the time), but it also warmed my heart that he held me in that high of regard. Divorce really is hardest on the kids, unfortunately, so I say whatever they call me is what I'll answer to.
It's up to the kids what to call her. They know the difference between Brandi and Leann, it's not a matter of replacing one with the other.
I'm sure there's a sting for Brandi, but she seems to be a loving and involved mom. I'm sure whenever she is with them, she knows that they love and adore her.
After The Short One has spent any significant time with his father, he sometimes calls me by his step-mother's name, so I'm sure he does the same with her (calling her "mom"). Sometimes he corrects himself, sometimes he doesn't. I never think anything of it.
Lucas, our situations sound similar. Mr. Disco and I are't married but are in a long term committed relationship. I call the boys my stepsons for brevity in conversation. The boys and I completely adore each other, but I know it would make their mother VERY upset if they were calling me "mom."
For a bit, the youngest would call me mommy on occasion and I would simply say "Your mommy would be very sad if she heard you call me mommy. I'm your Disco. (obviously i use my real name with them)." If they accidentally call me mom or mommy, they usually catch themselves and giggle and say "I almost called you mommy." and I giggle and I say it's okay. But I certainly don't try to get them to call me mom, nor do I go around yakking about them calling me mom in a passing moment.
More than likely the kids accidentally call her "mom" every now and again and she's trying to make more out of it than there actually is to it.
I call them by each other's names every now and again and they accidentally call me mommy some times. It happens.
Not my problem.
I think people are making a bigger deal out of this than it actually is. And to draw more attention to it only makes the kids self conscious about the whole thing. I've been a step mom, and my son has a step dad. I've been called mom, and my husband (step dad) has been called dad. The kids usually catch themselves and there is no point in making a big deal of it. Just because they slipped doesn't mean that their MOM is gone and forgotten.
All that being said, the step mom who insists the kids call her Mom should be strung out. THAT is all kinds of wrong.
As others said it depends on the situation. My kids have slipped up with names as they spend weekends over at their dad's and have a step parent at both houses but I'm Mommy and their dad is daddy. My stepdaughter once told me she wants to call me mom. I didn't outright say no but I pointed out the fact it may be strange for her real mom. I think I may be okay with my kids calling their stepmom a variation of mom but not mommy. that's reserved for me :o)
It depends. I grew up in the South, and I knew a lot of kids who had a "Mom" who was married to their dad, but "Mama" was their MAMA. Made perfect sense to me.
Whatever the kids feel, my son calls his Step-Mother, Momma and he's grown. We're all one big happy family.
Leanne is doing this just to pick at Brandi.
She's full of shit and incredibly annoying.
This will undoubtedly make Brandi go apeshit.
My nieces sometimes slip and call me "Daddy" but they know their dad. It just happens with kids.
What's funny is my oldest niece, Amaiya who turns 7 in May, feels it's her duty to tell other kids if it;s ok to call me uncle Chris or not. She'll say either "You can call him uncle Chris" or "He's MY Uncle Chris,, you can call him Chris or Mr. Chris" lol
agree she's probably making it up and wishing they would.
My mom used to go through every one of our names when she was yelling at one of us. Perfectly normal slip.
also, if the kids are comfortable, they should call her whatever they feel like.
You know, unless it's bad words inappropriate for their age. haha
My ex's little girl was learning who the adults in her life were when I started seeing her dad. Her mum and I got on very well and I looked after the lil lady often because her mum was having a difficult pregnancy with her new baby (she and my ex broke up before she found out she was pregnant, decided against staying together but decided to co parent, which is successful to this day, 11 years on).
Anyway, I remember phoning her in a panic because lil lady insisted on calling me mum all day, one day. I said things like 'no silly, mummy isn't here' or 'remember I'm *me*' but she didn't let it go. Fortunately her mum was lovely about it and told me she didn't mind as I spent just as much time raising her as she did at that point, but I still worked on not letting the habit become fact.
I'm glad I did that now since the relationship eventually broke down and my ex chose to withhold access, even though lil lady's mum did try to convince him to let me continue to be in her life, I ended up walking away because I didn't want my contact to rely on his mood and maybe confuse her.
I think in this case, knowing of LeAnn's past behaviour, she's trying to twist the knife in.
@saycheese I agree, it was probably by accident.
I called my supervisor 'mom' once by accident. And I was a few years older than her. weird.
Mr Chris .. Too cute!
Leann totally pulled this out of her ass.
"mom" is just a word. very different from throwing your arms around a person's neck and saying "i love you SO MUCH MOMMY!" but even then, kids can love lots of people. she can be an irritating thorn in brandi's ass, and STILL be a loving parental figure. is she, who knows.
The mere fact she openly stated this shows her lack of class and boundaries in this situation. I'm a stepmom and I would never say such a thing in public, even if it were true.
So long as it is respectful let the kids call her what they want. There are bigger issues for step families to resolve.
As a stepmother, I've always been in the let them pick what they want to call you camp.
Kid never called me mom, but his situation was so fucked up that I didn't want to confuse him more than he already was (and sadly continues to be to this day). Grandma raised him; mom abandoned him and started another family.
I seriously doubt they call her Mom.
She's been on a big "make Brandi mad" tour the past few days.
This is the woman who gave Eddie that birthday cake with herself and Eddie in bed and little figures of the boys looking on.
Real "Mom" material. If she wants to be a mom she needs to have her own kid. I'm surprised she hasn't already to try to bind Eddie to her.
My kid calls my husband daddy. It's a different circumstance, but when she was little she did it the first time she stopped short, he told her she could call him whatever she wanted. When she left the room, he did a fist pump in the air and said "Yes, she called me daddy!!!!" He's all kinds of awesome.
Leann, hmm probably is not.
Exactly. My own family calls me the wrong name all the time and sometimes my son calls me Dad after he's spent time with him. You can't replace someone's mom, no matter how hard you may try. She'll learn one day the hard way.
+1
Lying. She's such a shit stirrer.
@ The Dude - thanks. I feel the same way.
Leann actually said that they "slip" and call her mom sometimes. NBD.
My son was almost 3 when I got engaged to my now husband. I remember distinctly him telling his soon to be step sisters "He's my dad too!" So yes, if they want to call her mom, then they should be allowed to without her having to "correct" them. Brandi just needs to chill out and just worry about herself being a good mom instead of focusing her attention on Leann all the time.
My young nephews occasionally call me Mom especially after just leaving their Mom. It is a slip up!!!
Aww, that's cute!
Based on leann's bonus mom crap, this seems forced though. Kids just want to have fun and are trying not to get in trouble. So I can see how it would be easy to pressure them. When they call someone mom naturally it is sweet. I wish my kids had a great stepmom like some of you guys.
No, I don't think she should tell them not to if they are the ones calling her that. I have lots of friends with steps. Some kids call the step mom some version of "mom" (I love "Mom2", that's cute!), some call them by their first name and some probably call them "Bitch" under their breathe. :-/ I think it is entirely dependent on each family's dynamic. Based on what I know about LeAnn and Brandi, I think the kids should probably come up w/ some version of "Mom" as not to enrage Brandi.
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