Monday, August 18, 2008

Random Photos Part One

For the top spot today, we have Nicole Patrick. The reason? She would like a couple of minutes to explain to CDAN why she chose to wear the short red dress despite the bazillion bug bites. She told me that the day before this photo was taken, she had been doing a photoshoot in a field. The shoot required she lay down in said field where she was swarmed by various biting insects for several hours. She knew it looked awful, but was contractually required to wear the dress at the premiere of the film. She did have a pair of hose she was going to wear to hide the bites, but her manager told her not to wear them because they didn't match the dress. I know this has been keeping you up at night, so hopefully you will all rest better.

Now, with that out of the way, we can move on to America Fererra, who has been in the photos way too often lately, even for someone I really like.
Normally when the government of Malaysia says that a performer is too sexy or too provocative to perform in front of the Muslim crowd, I tend to agree with them. In this case, I don't though. I think they just assumed that since Avril Lavigne was a western singer that she must dress and act like a ho. I present to you, the people of Malaysia, what Avril usually wears while performing. A more body shy performer would be tough to find, even in her personal life. Now, as for the quality of the performance, well, maybe the ban isn't such a bad idea.
The strangest thing happened at the ALMA awards over the weekend. It was like all of the actors thought that people around the world were idiots and would have no idea what the particular person, or people were famous for. Case in point.

Cheech and Chong - famous for getting stoned on film.

Helio Castroneves - famous for driving
and for dancing.
Oscar De La Hoya - famous for boxing. For your eyesight, I chose to not post the photo where he drops trou and shows off his thong.
Carlos Mencia - I'm guessing this means joke stealer.
I didn't know Luke Skywalker got married over the weekend. Hey, you know I am happy for them. Jealous of Ellen perhaps, but you have to admit, Ellen does look Luke.

Duffy - Telford, UK
Death Cab For Cutie - Sydney
Bill Murray sky diving. It's definitely random.
"Sir Bob. Are you sitting down? OK, since Peaches got married, she has apparently slept with her ex, and was spotted making out and groping some random guy at a club while on vacation with you. As for her husband, he apparently had a female house guest over the weekend who spent the night."

Frank Vincent and Antonio Edwards Suarez on the set of their new film.

It's like taking a step back in time and looking at high school prom photos. The cougar and the freshman basketball player.
Awww, Eric Winter gave Roselyn Sanchez his class ring. Guess they are going steady.
Then there was the guy who came with his cousin. (If you are playing along at home, I would also accept foreign exchange student, guidance counselor who was always volunteering to chaperone, and narc)
And the kid who skipped about 6 grades.Edward James Olmos and his mother. Edward is looking really good.
Want to know when someone has too much money? They get tired of going to a tanning salon, and so have a spray tanner installed in their bathroom at home.

I actually think this is the first time Jorge Garcia has been in the photos. Long overdue Jorge.
The only explanation is maybe there was a PTA meeting after.
You know what? Jessica Alba actually looks frazzled enough where I believe she might be taking care of her kid on her own most of the time.
Girls Aloud - Chelmsford, UK
Couldn't be the DIVA Awards without Maxi Pad making an appearance.

Macaulay Culkin for the first time in a long time. He and Mila Kunis have been together a very long time. Happy Birthday to Mila byt he way. I think she just turned 25 over the weekend.
Do you think the guy carrying LisaRaye Misick's bag has heard about the biting story and if he will complain if she doesn't tip him?
Lostprophets - Telford, UK
I like to check in every four or five months to see how Lisa Lisa is doing.
Rigmar Gustafsson - Her Xheim, Pfalz Germany

The obnoxiously good looking couple award of the day goes to Rande Gerber and Cindy Crawford. Isn't she like 100 by now?
He acts like he isn't getting paid enough.

New Kids On The Block? More like the degenerates down the street who couldn't get a job and are living back at home with their parents. Yeah, I know, I know, you love them. But, if they were just three guys in a photo, what would you think? And I swear if anyone tells me you would f**k Danny Wood if he wasn't who he was, then you are full of crap. He looks like Edgar from Men In Black. You know, the farmer who was taken over by the cock roach and couldn't get the face right.
Will Young - Telford, UK

The Stranglers - Chelmsford, UK
The Pogues - Telford, UK
"I'm Chevy Chase, and you're not."


califblondy said...

OMG, would somebody please give Paula the number for a decent stylist?! What's the boytoy, I thought they broke-up and he was stalking her? Nevermind, I really don't care.

Thanks for the bug bite explanation, Ent, maybe I can sleep tonight. I would hate to be under contract to wear something. If I'm not in the mood for something, no way am I putting it on. Kills my whole night.

Maja With a J said...

It loosk like America Ferrera has lost some weight...I hope it's a just a natural progerssion of things rather than her falling for the Hollywood beauty myth...she's still gorgeous though, love her.

And every time I see a picture of NKOTB '08, I just feel sorry for Donnie Wahlberg. There must be some sort of contractual obligation he has to fulfill. The guy is a pretty talented - and serious - actor...and he has to prance a round in tight t-shirts and baseball hats that are slightly askew. He is TOO OLD for that shit...and HE KNOWS.

Rare Avis said...

Bwahahahaahaaaa Edgar from men in black. rib cracker....

mooshki said...

Props to Nicole for honoring her obligation. Remember Samantha's peel on S&TC? Her manager, on the other hand, bad call. :)

I'm still not sick of seeing pics of America. Speaking of A's, still missing WD. :(

Only Roselyn is good enough for someone as pretty as Eric.

Did you see the "Miami Vice" where EJO went all ninja? It was the hotness.

Is Jorge as awesome as Hurley?

Macaulay/Mila - RANDOM PHOTO REVEAL! :) SMG was at Mila's b-day party. Also random, but awesome!

"He acts like he isn't getting paid enough."
-Um, yeah.

Stranglers & Pogues? College flashback!

Chevy scares me. Fletch lives, and his sharp tongue will cut you open.

irishstayc2 said...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH edgar from Men in Black - damn- I am cracking up on that one! i can't watch Vincent D'Onofrio in ANYTHING w/ out thinking of that movie!

mooshki said...

Harriet, America lost a bunch of weight and the "Ugly Betty" people told her to put some of it back on. She has looked pretty thin the last couple of weeks, so I guess she's currently winning the battle with them. I'm not sure where I stand - it's her body, but I would be so sad to see her waste away like the others.

jax said...

omg i just read that Donnie has a 15 year old kid???

retire dude.

mooshki said...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry to go all off-topic on y'all, but Star says Kate is trying to get back with Owen. I can't stand it.

Murphy Brown 2020 said...

I just read that too, Mooshki. Just let it happen. They're both gigantic, overrated whores. They even kind of look alike, if you squint hard enough.

Avril sucks, and her nose is weird. It's always bothered me, as has her inability to adopt a new look. Amy Poehler does such a fucking great impression of her: "I'm a PUNK! HELL YEAH!"

I truly think that Cindy looks better now than she did a decade ago. I always thought Rande was such a downgrade from Richard Gere, to be sort of honest.

I never liked NKOTB. I still don't. I would much rather see that dead dude from Milli Vanilli rise from the dead or something and get together with Fab (whatever -- the one who ISN'T dead) and lay down some new tracks. I'm cool with Paula sticking around as an eighties remnant, though, because she amuses me so much. NICE DRESS. GOOD GOD.

Nicole Patrick: fire your manager, honey. You were right about the hose. And I'm a girl who LOATHES hose, but you sorely needed it that night. Yowza.

Wow. Rosalyn Sanchez is so gorgeous! Jeebus.

Heigl looks insane. Gofugyourself just fugged her, and I was hoping they would. That hair is HORRID, and so is the fakeass tan.

Chevy looks OLD. :-(

Macauley looks TWELVE.

Brenda22 said...

Does this mean Mila was the actress who is still a virgin?

Lifebeginsat30ty said...

Bwahaha. That Heigl crack was spot on! I sputtered at the chevy chase one too :)

ms snarky said...

Chevy Chase, Andre Agassi, and Rob Thomas in one photo?? It's the definition of RANDOM. assuming my eyes are seeing correctly.

mooshki said...

Ern, but I luuuuuurv Owen. :(

Unknown said...

Heigl looks 40. A tired 40.

Ms. said...

Nicole Patrick should have put make-up on her legs.

Revlon makes ColorStay and it's a good cover up for a drug store brand.

There's good pancake make-up from any professional film make-up artist... Think girl, think. No need to show up with shredded legs.

She sure didn't do anyone any favours by wearing that dress with her messed up legs. I doubt the person/company to whom she was contractually obliged was thrilled.

Ayesha said...

Hey, leave Jodie Foster alone. She is a woman of a certain age and she has kids. What is she *supposed* to be wearing? She's dressed perfectly appropriately for a daytime event.


Ayesha said...

Hey, leave Jodie Foster alone. She is a woman of a certain age and she has kids. What is she *supposed* to be wearing? She's dressed perfectly appropriately for a daytime event.


lutefisk said...

Brenda--I kind of took that for Mila also.

By the way--people dress much better at PTA meetings!

selenakyle said...

We have two skin-tone extremes here--Heigl loooking like Magda from "There's Something About Mary," and Macaulay Culkin looking like Lestat.

Sheesh--get out in the sun once in a while, boy. That big ol' orange ball in the sky won't kill you before you can get some color on that face!

Sorry, but it's gross when people are so pale they look blue-white.

Joanne said...

Wasn't there a blind about a pop singer that wouldn't let her husband see her naked . . . Avril reveal?

Unknown said...

Great suit on Jorge.

Man, The Stranglers look better than NKOTB. Maybe Old Has Beens on the Corner.

Unknown said...

Paula looks like Miss Kitty from Gunsmoke in this picture

Anonymous said...

Ent I'm gonna be your dissenter - Danny Wood was always my favorite in NKOTB. I have odd taste, though. Danny was always the muscley one.

That's cool that Nicole Patrick wrote in to clarify.

I wouldn't mind seeing Oscar drop trou, he's always been a handsome man.

Jorge seems like such a good guy. Read his blog:

Jodie looks like Nicole Richie in that photo.

Maxi Pad - scary, never seen her before.

And I'm with califblondy; I thought JT was stalking Paula (who looks seriously crap here)

Stacy said...

Who is that gorgeous hunk of man meat from Lostprophets and why haven't I seen his fine ass before?

Unknown said...

Damn, so I guess that virgin blind item with the past tense couple is no good for Mila Kunis? :( I felt so sure about that one.

hromaki said...

MORE JORGE! I love that guy.

marie said...

@stacy: That hunk of a meat is called Ian Watkins. A fine man from a fine band!!

Also very happy to see Will Young, and my old favourite Donnie wahlberg :)

Unknown said...

Shane McGowan! I love him!

DetroitRocker said...

Sir Bob to my count was on his 4 glass of wine and that was before breakfast. He'll learn like me that having a teenage daughter, it's cheaper to get your wine by the brown bag bottle than the glass.

It's the only way to get through those teenage years feeling warm and fuzzy.

mooshki said...

Ooh, nice catch Joanne!

Megan, why do you say that? I thought this WAS a reveal for Mila & the virgin item. (Culkin is the current "boyfriend," Wilmer was the Ex.)

Amber said...

Jorge's a sweetie pie! and Will Young was SOOO funny on Sunday Night Project

Ella said...

That Chevy Chase caption should really read "I'm Rob Thomas and you're not!"

By the way, Rob gave a smoking hot performance to help raise money for Agassi's school, so props to him. My connections tell me he was HOT, HOT, HOT! Those East Hampton women, and a lot of the men, were reportedly pretty weak-kneed by the time he was done. One fabulously dressed fellow was left moping his brow as he asked his partner if anyone had known a hurricane was predicted. Pretty funny stuff.

Unknown said...

Mooshki, was it revealed? I read the blind like the couple was past tense and when ent posted that they are still together that took them out of the running?

Jungle007 said...

Who is Maxi Pad? That thing scares the shit outta me.... please, please...
someone make it go away....

and what ent-- are you saying that Edward James Olmos' mother DOESN'T look good?

But Jodie looks sweet... it's pretty damn casual but who cares? She's put it her time, she deserves to be comfortable...
she's at a daytime event in another country anyways...

Paula= the daughter of lucifer...
That dress/hairdo/pathetic neck ornament makes me want to cry... How is it that not even her doorman just happens to mention to the cracker that she looks like a lampshade from morticia's powder room??? She needs to go to rehab or.... some shit...


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