Friday, July 27, 2007

Tired Of The Triumvirate

So all day I've been thinking I need to talk about Britney and her troubles in Vegas or Lindsay and her carjacking or even Paris and her 354th new dog. But honestly, I'm tired of the three of them. I haven't checked the labels to see how many times I've written about them in the last 9 months but I guarantee they are there the most. I would much rather rant at Posh or look at Isla Fisher being pregnant photos but honestly, all gossip sites see a huge spike when you have something like Lindsay getting arrested.

It's cool to write about the arrest and the drama that follows but then it just goes on and on and on and then she will probably show up at a party this weekend and then the speculation will be about is she drinking or not and Britney will have a breakdown and flash her boobies to the world and have sex in the lobby at the Westward Ho (insert own joke there). Paris will no doubt try and convince the world who watches Larry King that she's reformed and helping out children's charities and People will be right behind her with their knee pads while the rest of us know she's off doing drugs and still being Paris.

I don't want you to think I'm ignoring the Paris and Lindsay and Britney triumvirate today, but I just don't feel like I have anything to add to what the other million gossip sites have said. Whenever I write about something I try and find the one angle that has been written about the least, or not at all like how did Lindsay put on someone else's pants and then run out to the truck fast enough to get in and chase the assistant? Remember, it has to be someone else's pants because the coke found in the pants isn't hers. The pants above are what she was wearing a few hours before she got arrested. What pants was she wearing when she did get arrested? I guess it's possible that one of the guys in the truck or the guy she ran over with the truck could have reached over to her and stuffed the coke inside her pants because coke in your pants is just a party waiting to happen. Speaking of those guys. They are the most boring guys in the world. I watched that damn TMZ video last night about midnight and it was better than my best friend NyQuil.

Britney is just one mess after another. Have you ever been with kids in Vegas? They don't mix. Sure people pretend they do by saying nice things about Circus Circus and the theme like hotels, but really its about adults going out getting drunk, having lots of sex with their significant other or a stranger and losing your rent money because the guy throwing the dice works for the casino. So she starts off with kids in tow and then goes to the Wynn which just gives me the creeps anyway. You know heebie jeebies? I get them when I go there. But then I'm a downtown kind of guy anyway. I know what I'm in Vegas for and unless I'm on a weekend date with someone I'm trying to impress, there isn't going to be any Mamma Mia or Circus of the Sun.

I just can't understand why she doesn't want to stay home if she's going to be with the kids? If she wants to go to Vegas, then fine, go and have a great time but why take the chance on your kid getting hurt (which he did) by bringing them along when you know you are going to be swarmed? Leave them with their dad, don't violate court orders and then you can relax and go and get naked and marry your brother. That's what Vegas is for. Right Angelina? (Satire people. It's satire)


jlb said...

LMAO Ent on the AJ "satire".

There is an actual town here in Alberta that is called Westward's not far from the mountains....hell, maybe it's close to Brad's cabin (I think I read he bought somewhere by Cochrane)...Brit could VayKay there until she sobers up or whatever it is she needs to do.

GammaGirl said...

Oh Ent, I love you!
As a far more amateur blogger, I have been with the never ending celebutard it goes...

Hez said...

Since you put it like that, yes, Ent, I will go to Vegas with you.

Tracee said...

triumvirate ?! Ent, you teach me something every day! i thought you were refering to a STD, but Merriam Webster told me differently. Thank you teacher! :)

Chris said...

Triumverate soon to become the quadrumvirate.....

Rumors are flying that JAMIE LYNN Spears is preggo by her 19 yo BF - wowzers...can we get a bit more drama here people?

This is according to the National Enquirer which we all know is an impeccable source for the truth *kaffkaff*

Here's one of the blog sites that picked up the story

Unknown said...

If you never ran another item on Parasite again I'd be thrilled. I am sooo over that douchebag.

The trainwreck is still headed for ole LL.

What the hell Brit doin in Vegas? She should be home taking care of that new puppy of hers! She can leave the kids with the nanny anywhere, like she always does.

tara said...

cant someone call child protective services for this sort of thing? isnt she endangering her children? isnt that illegal?

ent... why isnt she staying at home when she's with the kids? i've got the answer for that one... no cameras! remember what warren beatty said to madonna in truth or dare- if its not on camera, then there's no point in doing it!

jamie lynn spears preggers? i've heard this too, but isnt she under contract with disney? there is no way they will let her have that baby. DISNEY will totally make her get rid of it! i've heard this is common practice for them and its in their contracts that they CANT get pregnant. Sick, i know, but i've heard it too many times to thinks its just a rumor.

MnGddess said...

Hez, I want in on the bridal party. You need to have at least 30 bridesmaids or so.

Anyhoo, has a bunch of interviews with the guys that were in the SUV Lindsay was "driving". From what they said, here is a rough list of her violations:

1. Drinking at party, violating court order.

2. Stole car.
3. Kidnapping the two guys in the car who were yelling at her to stop and let them out.

4. Assault. She ran over the foot of the guy whose car she stole. (Say that ten times fast!)

5. Speeding down PCH and making U-turns on PCH chasing her assistant.

6. Running at least a half dozen stop signs. At one intersection she narrowly missed a head on collision with a turning vehicle.

And to top this FINE mess off, she threatened the guys in the car with a lawsuit if they laid a hand on her. (AKA the guys trying to get her to stop driving like an idiot.)

AND when she was finally pulled out of the SUV and questioned by the police, she said the black kid was driving.

Oh, and she also allegedly said that she's a celebrity and can do whatever the hell she wants.

I can't even wrap my head around this....


Unknown said...

Lets wave goodbye to Lindsay why don't we? After seeing the latest regarding her little chase adventure I think this girl needs to go away and stay away for a long long time.

Take away her celeb status.

Unknown said...

And that post is why I am a CDAN addict. :) Thanks ENT

kellygirl said...

it's pretty sad when even the gossip addicts are voting for a ban on Paris lindsay and Brit.
Let's just chalk them all up to "Tara Reid status" - we know their crazy loser addicts, 'nuf said.
Unless one of them commits murder or suicide, there really is nothing more we need to hear about them.

wineaux said...

here's what happened with lindsay (at least this is what her lawyers will say)....'somebody said action and I thought I was on movie set doing my own stunts. I said "line" and someone said "I'm a celebrity i can't get in trouble" and another person gave me an actual line which i put it in my pocket for later.....'


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